Chapter 68: No Work Tomorrow

Two hours later, Gan Ling started looking at the travel guide I’d sent her, quoting parts of it one by one to give her opinions.

Basically, it was all “This one’s good, that one’s good, this one is good too.”

The heart that had been lodged in my throat finally dropped back into my stomach. Had Gan Ling gone home to recharge? Where had she gone during the day? I thought, if she and I ran off to another city, I’d definitely find myself a job right away, and learn something to fill my time. Otherwise, sitting at home waiting would turn me into a nagging wife for sure.

There were no Zheng Chenggang-shaped storm clouds in other cities. I definitely wouldn’t be as anxious and insecure as I was now.

Gan Ling couldn’t wait until the next day. When she saw that I’d just finished washing up and wasn’t asleep yet, she suddenly said she was coming over.

It was already 11:30 at night. When Gan Ling appeared at the door, I was about to open it when the lock clicked, and she walked in carrying the key. That’s when I remembered I’d already gotten a key made for her. There was a bit of that fresh “wife” feeling as I rubbed my hands and stood by, waiting.

She wasn’t carrying anything. She kicked off her shoes, leaned against the door, and stuck her foot into the shoe cabinet to slip on her slippers. I caught the fragrance on her, and only then noticed her hair ends were still damp. Her clothes were new too—ones I hadn’t seen before. A gray thin jacket over a beige empire-waist top, and dark gray nine-minute pants that looked ironed, crisp and clean. I glanced down as Gan Ling lifted her arm, and that short tank top obediently rode up, revealing a sliver of waist, though it was blocked by the jacket.

I lifted the jacket to get a proper look, but Gan Ling stomped her foot to settle into her slippers. Before I could see clearly, she pressed her hands to my cheeks, tilting my face up to meet hers. She leaned in for a kiss and hooked the door shut with one leg—boom.

My face burned as I clung to her neck and kissed her back, thinking to myself, oh no. I hadn’t built up good stamina from running yet, and here she was pulling this on me—I really couldn’t keep up. My breathing couldn’t match the rhythm of her kisses. When she pinned me to the sofa, I was still dazed. Gan Ling slowed down, brushing her hair back behind her ears. That’s when I finally said, “You smell so good… What body wash do you use?”

“It’s perfume,” Gan Ling said.

I’m a country bumpkin who only knows the overpowering scents in elevators—I’ve never had a good impression of perfume. I never imagined it could smell this nice. I leaned into her neck for another sniff. Gan Ling said, “I showered before coming over. The perfume’s cheap stuff—I got it for twenty bucks at the two-yuan store.”

But wouldn’t she get dirty on the way? She might as well have showered at my place.

No sooner had I thought that than Gan Ling sniffed my neck too. “Baby lotion scent.”

“You’re teasing me,” I said, feeling itchy but still defending myself. “It’s fig essence conditioner.”

Gan Ling’s hot breath enveloped me as she kissed me in fits and starts, murmuring words like silken threads tugging my nerves toward her. I had a vague sense of the changes in her body. In the chaos, I touched her taut lines with a novel thrill. She was so different from me— I was all soft and slick, delicate and weak, while she was full of power, her lines flowing smoothly, a marvel of creation.

And right now, this body seemed to be speaking to me, with a thousand words tangled all over me.

Before I even asked, I considered it seriously—really seriously—even recalling my experiences with Lu Jinshi, which made me dizzy right away. I confessed honestly, “I’m a little scared…”

“Of what?”

“What do you think?” I was too embarrassed to say it outright.

Strangely, the mood was perfect right now, the romance at this point—there’s no way I meant anything else in this context. But Gan Ling suddenly wasn’t on the same wavelength. She furrowed her brows, clearly very worried, like I’d ruined the moment by saying I was scared of cockroaches. Perplexed and concerned, the physical changes faded, leaving only a gentle, careful embrace.

“It’s okay.”

We were talking past each other again! What could possibly be wrong with me? I was confused—clearly Gan Ling’s thoughts had jumped to another dimension.

I had no choice but to say, “I just… um… it’s not that I’m afraid of pain, it’s just… that experience wasn’t very… pleasant… not painful exactly, just… weird… I can’t twist my mindset around it right away. But I-I’m not forcing myself, I… um… I want to, if it’s you… um… then, then I’d be willing to try…”

I mangled the sentence so badly it nearly broke my heart. Gan Ling lowered her eyes to look at me, stroking my shoulder as she waited for me to continue.

I steeled myself: “Because… because with… with a guy, it’s different… With a guy, I was conservative… like, only after engagement, marriage… But you—you can’t marry me. Anyway, I’m not… um, not that devout anymore. It’s just some inertia in my mindset…”

The sentence trailed off messily, and the rest was too shameful to say. I closed my eyes, going all in: “If you always… always respect my opinion… I might just… just keep refusing forever… If you… um… force me the moment you come in, if you want to, I… whatever, just forget about me.”

I’d given up on words—they were fragmented wreckage. But Gan Ling understood, her voice dropping to a breathy whisper with a hint of amusement. “You mean, you want me to force you?”

“Forget about me!” I snapped in embarrassed fury, not sure if I was mad at my own clumsy mouth or at Gan Ling. I’d waited for her all day—my heart was full of her. She barged in all aggressive, and now she was playing the gentleman. At this point, she still had to ask? Asking what? Shame was tearing me apart—let me fend for myself!

Look at this woman. She’d done all this prep—showered at midnight, sprayed perfume, changed into new clothes. Clearly here to do something. And now she was asking me to sign a consent form?

But beyond the anger, my heart was stuffed full of gratitude. She cared about my feelings, wanted me to voice my intentions myself.

That made sense, but with shame surging, I wasn’t being reasonable.

Gan Ling stood up, and I froze. She wasn’t seriously going to lecture me on tuning into my feelings right now, was she? My feelings were utter mortification! This woman! She was always so domineering and direct, drawing conclusions without giving anyone room to argue or equivocate. From start to finish, she was unyieldingly tough. Her soul had edges and corners—even her gentleness didn’t make her roundabout. Her gentleness was “Mommy knows best!” Might as well kill me!

I watched wide-eyed as Gan Ling walked around the sofa toward the bathroom.

Fine, today I had to graduate from Gan Ling’s selfishness class. Like breaking the ice at a new job, I had to shamelessly state my demands—just like her, righteous and unreasonable. I had to express my feelings, regardless of what anyone else thought.

So I sat up against the sofa back. Gan Ling was heading to the bathroom.

“Gan Ling, listen up. I, Jiang Xiaohui, my demand today is—” I took a deep breath. “You’re already here, and I think you’re so sexy. I want you to bully me—anytime. If you want to, don’t worry about whether I refuse or not… on this matter.”

Water rushed as Gan Ling whipped her head around in shock. The soap slipped from her hands—splat—down the sink.

She fished around a few times before grabbing it, looking away with a low laugh. “I don’t have work tomorrow.”