Chapter 29: Perfect. It’ll Be More Convenient for Me to Abandon Her Soon.
As Qingming approached, Jingcheng was shrouded in a continuous drizzle.
The night was rather cool. Under the dim yellow light of the street lamps, the raindrops glistened with a faint silver light. Most of the pedestrians on the street held umbrellas and had switched to long sleeves.
Huai Xing was a bit sensitive to the cold. She had been wearing long sleeves when she went out these past two days, but after returning home and taking a shower, the pajamas she wore would soon be stripped off.
She had, after all, started living the kind of life Gu Rufeng had once complained about in novels.
Working at the company during the day, and having sex with her “superior” when she got home at night.
At this moment, her fair skin was tinged with a light pink, her eyes moist as she lay on top of the mature woman, letting out sensual gasps.
Every part of her body had been thoroughly explored by Chu Wantang. Chu Wantang had completely mastered the rhythm of her every climax.
As a result, she could only cling to and rely on Chu Wantang during the process.
Otherwise, she would have no direction, drifting and wandering on the sea.
The comforter lightly covered them, their body temperatures having long since entered a shared mode.
Chu Wantang turned her head slightly to look at Huai Xing’s reaction, then leaned over to kiss her with a look of pity, swallowing all her passionate responses, her hand on her waist slowly rubbing.
A scented candle was burning in the room, and their intimate figures were once again cast on the wall.
After a long while, Chu Wantang finally released her lips and tongue, ending the ambiguous sound of their kissing.
She stroked Huai Xing’s cheek and asked softly in a reluctant tone, “Do you have to go back to Yuncheng tomorrow?”
Tomorrow was the start of the three-day Qingming holiday. A few days ago at Yuelan Wu, Huai Xing had already bought a plane ticket back to Yuncheng.
“I’ll be back soon,” Huai Xing’s lips were rosy as they parted and closed. “I have some things I want to say to my mom. Besides, don’t you have to go to the cemetery in Jingcheng to see Auntie?”
Chu Wantang was a local of Jingcheng and would also go to the cemetery where Chu Lingyi was buried during the Qingming Festival in the past.
Chu Wantang’s eyelashes fluttered, and she replied, “Mm.”
She then pinched Huai Xing’s waist and reminded her, “Do you still remember what you promised me?”
“Don’t worry, Chu Chu. I’ll go back at a different time from Sister Shiwei. When I get to Yuncheng, I’ll meet with Auntie Wen and the others.” Huai Xing stroked her beautifully curved eyebrow and quickly changed the subject. “Am I too heavy, pressing on you like this?”
Chu Wantang couldn’t help but laugh. “No.”
She then slowly raised an eyebrow. “What if I said you were? Would you prop yourself up again?”
“No…” Huai Xing immediately refused. Just now, she had been propped up on top, kneeling and lying forward on Chu Wantang’s body while being taken.
As she spoke, she took a finger cot from the side and put it on her slender middle finger in front of Chu Wantang.
Then she went to kiss Chu Wantang’s chin and asked, wanting praise, “Have I improved a lot?”
“If you haven’t improved after so many times,” Chu Wantang’s lips curled up, her tone lazy, “then I should consider taking a break.”
The word “break” was said very lightly by her.
Huai Xing’s breath caught, and she almost couldn’t breathe. She quickly lightened her breathing, hid her thoughts, and her eyes curved.
The end of her words lifted. “Good thing my learning ability is very strong. Thank you, Teacher Chu Chu.”
She slowly inserted her finger.
And didn’t neglect the outside.
She learned from Chu Wantang.
She used the pad of her thumb to press, rub, and twist.
Chu Wantang turned her head, her breath slightly chaotic.
She closed her eyes, bit her lip, her palm on Huai Xing’s shoulder, her pink fingertips trembling.
The person on top of her slowly moved down, and fine lip prints landed on her delicate skin.
The gradually rapid breathing drowned out the sound of the light rain outside the window.
The candlelight flickered, and the night grew thicker.
…
On Saturday, the day of the Qingming Festival, Wen Ruyu had originally wanted to take Wen Shiwei and Xia Yi to the cemetery with Huai Xing, but Huai Xing had politely and tactfully refused with a smile. “Auntie Wen, I have some things I want to say to my mom alone.”
Hearing this, Wen Ruyu understood. She took out her car keys and agreed gently, “Alright then. You can take Auntie’s car.”
“Do you want me to drive you there, Xingxing?” Wen Shiwei asked, taking the opportunity.
“No need, Sister Shiwei. It’s too much trouble to make a trip,” Huai Xing said, taking the car keys. She had wanted to say thank you, but then she was afraid that Wen Ruyu would think she was being too distant, so she held it in.
“What’s so troublesome between us?” Wen Shiwei frowned slightly. “Have you really grown distant from me?”
Huai Xing shook her head. “How could that be!”
But she could only refuse. “Really, no need, Sister Shiwei. You guys just wait for me.”
Wen Shiwei could only smile. “Alright, alright.”
Huai Xing drove to the cemetery. There were many people at the cemetery today, unlike the trip she and Chu Wantang had made in February.
The sky was overcast, as heavy as a lead plate, pressing down low on their heads, making the cemetery feel even more oppressive.
The smell of burning paper money floated in the air, and someone was wailing loudly, their cries dissipating with the wind.
But the pain would not be diminished in the slightest.
The area around Huai Zhao’s tombstone was still very clean. Huai Xing placed a new bouquet of white chrysanthemums, knelt down, and reached out to wipe the photo of her mother on the tombstone.
There were many people in the cemetery, but the family next to her had already left after offering flowers, so her area was relatively quiet.
She pressed her lips together, slowly retracted her hand, and said softly, “Mom, I didn’t write a little essay in advance this time, but I still have a lot to say to you.”
“I remember when I was in the eighth grade, you once found a love letter from a classmate in my schoolbag. A male classmate had secretly slipped it to me, but you found it first. I was very angry. Why couldn’t he just tell me openly instead of secretly slipping it into my schoolbag? But you told me that there will always be some people in the world who are not so brave, and that it’s okay to just politely refuse them later.”
“And now, I’ve also become a coward who only dares to secretly slip love letters. No, I don’t even dare to slip love letters. I don’t dare to let her know a single bit of my feelings for her, otherwise, I’ll make things difficult for her. She’s raised me for so long. I shouldn’t make things difficult for her.”
The tip of Huai Xing’s nose soured, and a teardrop fell from her eyelashes.
She wiped it away with the back of her hand and continued, this time forgetting the honorific. “Mom… if you were still alive, you wouldn’t mind that the person I like is of the same sex, right? Because you once told me that love between the same sex should be respected, not strangled by all sides…”
She remembered her mother’s expression when she said that, serious and heavy.
“But Mom…” Huai Xing sat on the ground, her tears flowing down the corners of her eyes. “The person I like is Chu Wantang, the older sister who was supposed to be on the same household register as us.”
“Is that okay too?”
As soon as she said that, the white chrysanthemums moved with the wind, and a petal swayed twice before falling onto the stone slab.
As if giving her an answer.
Huai Xing stared at the petal. A few seconds later, she picked it up preciously and placed it in her palm.
She then turned to look at Huai Zhao’s photo and smiled through her tears. “Is it okay? You’re right. My mom is the great lawyer Huai Zhao. I’m her daughter. You taught me that I can’t lack the courage to love.” Her eyes were sparkling as she sniffed. “Mom, I like her very much. I think she likes me too. Otherwise, why would she care about me so much, and even get jealous and unhappy… Mm, then let’s continue with this relationship for now. I’m willing. She has her own difficulties. I’ll protect her well!”
“She likes me very much.”
On the other side, in a cemetery in Jingcheng, Chu Wantang was also talking to Chu Lingyi.
But she didn’t know how to say the word “Mom.”
Unlike the cloudy day in Yuncheng, it was still drizzling in Jingcheng.
She held an umbrella and knelt down with a heavy expression to wipe Chu Lingyi’s tombstone. She paused here and then continued, “Perhaps, in her eyes, I also like her, because I act like I care about her, get jealous of her childhood friend, and get unhappy…” She twitched her lips. “Let me declare to you: it’s not the love of family, but the love of romance.”
Chu Lingyi’s photo became clear after being wiped.
Chu Wantang looked at her own similar features, gently stroked them with her fingertips, and then sighed. “It’s strange. I don’t want to dream of you. After all, you didn’t love me. My birth was a heavy shackle for you…” She blinked her red-rimmed eyes. “But I dreamed of you a while ago.”
“I dreamed that you were preparing a 22nd birthday gift for her that you would never send, just like you had for the past ten years. I couldn’t help but question you why you loved her so much. She’s not your daughter. I’m your child, right?”
“You didn’t answer me in the dream. Actually, I know the answer. Because she is Huai Zhao’s daughter.”
After taking a deep breath, Chu Wantang held the umbrella forward to shield Chu Lingyi’s tombstone from the rain.
She flicked her hair, her gaze falling on the name carved on the tombstone. She thought for a moment and continued, “I remember when I was seven, you took me to Yuncheng for the first time. We sat in the coffee shop opposite the law firm for a long time. After we came back, I found a chance to ask Xu Zhixun. He said that you and Huai Zhao used to be very good friends, but you both loved him, and in the end, you parted ways because of him. What did you do to not even have the courage to see your former friend? Or, what did she do?”
At this point, Chu Wantang closed her eyes, and memories flooded back.
When she was seven, Chu Lingyi had taken her from Jingcheng to Yuncheng. She didn’t know why, but she had obediently followed her mother all the way and finally found Huai Zhao’s law firm.
But Chu Lingyi had hesitated to go in. She had first paced around for a long time, and finally, she had taken her to the coffee shop opposite to sit down.
After sitting for more than half an hour, a little girl who was still stumbling came out of the law firm. Huai Zhao followed behind, holding a toy and smiling brightly, bending down to tease her.
Chu Lingyi was already on edge. Seeing this scene, she covered her face and both cried and laughed. “So you have a child…”
She asked the air, “What’s her name, Ah Zhao?”
Chu Wantang looked at her mother’s state and made a decision on her own.
She went out of the coffee shop, pretended to walk around, and then came to the law firm’s entrance from the direction they had come from, and asked Huai Zhao, “Auntie, your little sister is so cute. What’s her name?”
Huai Zhao looked at her face, heard her obvious Jingcheng accent, and was stunned for a moment. After looking around to no avail, she smiled and answered, “Her name is Huai Xing.” She then added, “The ‘Huai’ in ‘huainian’ (to miss), and the ‘Xing’ in ‘xingyun’ (lucky). Born on July 17th. Come on, Xingxing, call her Jiejie.”
The little girl, who hadn’t even grown a few teeth, hid behind Huai Zhao, hugging her mother’s thigh, looking a little timid.
But she still tentatively said, “Jie… Jiejie.”
Huai Zhao looked at Chu Wantang and asked back, “What’s your name? Where are your parents?”
“My name is Wantang,” Chu Wantang only answered her name.
“Is your surname Xu or Chu?”
The seven-year-old Chu Wantang didn’t have time to think about why Huai Zhao would know so clearly and answered, “…My surname is Chu.”
Huai Zhao held her daughter’s hand tightly and smiled nervously. “Don’t tell your mother I asked this, okay?”
“Okay.”
Chu Wantang replied, her gaze falling on the little girl’s face.
Then she heard the little girl call her in a soft voice, “Jiejie.”
“She’s still calling me Jiejie now.” The memory paused. Chu Wantang lifted her eyelids and twitched the corners of her lips. “I sometimes regret it. If I hadn’t gone up to ask her name that day, you wouldn’t have missed her so much, right? You transferred your guilt towards Huai Zhao to her. From then on, my birthday became July 17th in your eyes, even though you had never spoken a word to her. But you watched her grow up. You did love her.”
“But she’s being tormented by me now. I can see that she’s struggling, not wanting to make things difficult for me on one hand, and wanting to get my love on the other, trying to breathe freely in this twisted relationship… She’s so naive and easy to deceive.”
“I feel a little more balanced in my heart, maybe more than a little.”
Chu Lingyi couldn’t give any response. The tombstone stood quietly under the umbrella.
The wind suddenly grew stronger, and the rain slanted in, fine raindrops sticking to Chu Wantang’s black pants, soaking them bit by bit.
Chu Wantang stood up straight, her expression cold.
She gripped the handle of the umbrella tightly, her fingernails turning white. She lifted the brim of the umbrella slightly and looked up at the gray sky.
Her mind flashed with images of Chu Lingyi asking her in the past if Huai Xing would like this birthday gift, and then with fragments of her time with Huai Xing over the past four years.
The images were very jumpy, covered with a not-so-real filter, making one feel dazed.
After a few minutes, she gave Chu Lingyi a smile. “In short, it’s okay.”
She still couldn’t say the word “Mom.” “Ms. Chu, I’m not the only one in pain now.”
“She actually fell in love with me. So, now she likes me, relies on me, and trusts me more than I imagined. She only has eyes for me, and she’ll listen to whatever I say…”
At this point, Chu Wantang suppressed the hint of reluctance that had appeared in her heart. She turned around with the umbrella and strode away.
Her voice mixed with the wind and rain, a very indifferent sentence—
“Perfect. It’ll be more convenient for me to abandon her soon.”
