Chapter 96
In early January, the filming of Dust World wrapped up, and Bo Muyu returned to Qinzhou with Su Man.
She first went back to her own place to put away her luggage, and then went to her parents’. Having been away from Qinzhou for several months, she planned to stay with her parents for a while, since the Spring Festival was also coming up in a little over a month.
She had brought back some gifts from her trip. For her parents, it was snacks, for Lin Chuwan, some preserved fruits, and for Mother Lin, some tea. These were all bought before she came back. She had wandered around that unfamiliar city, and whenever she saw something that caught her eye, she would buy it for her family and friends.
Sometimes, she would have the impulse to buy something for Jiang Chenyin too, to have her parents pass it on, or when she went to Jiang Gaojun’s restaurant for dinner, to have him take it to her on the weekend when he went back to the old residence.
But she would always give up the idea. What was the use? Jiang Chenyin would know at the first opportunity that it was from her. She couldn’t even imagine Jiang Chenyin being unwilling to accept those things, or even putting them away on a high shelf.
Bo Muyu was organizing the gifts in her suitcase, and she let out a low sigh. She still couldn’t control her emotions, couldn’t not care about Jiang Chenyin’s reaction. It was still not suitable for them to meet now. At least she still couldn’t see Jiang Chenyin without any emotional fluctuations.
After she got home, she rested for a day, and the next day, she went to the Lin family’s house to visit, bringing the gifts she had for Lin Chuwan and Mother Lin.
Bo Muyu and Lin Chuwan had not seen each other for several months, and they had a secret between them that no one else knew. She had already told Lin Chuwan the gist of it on the phone a few days ago, so she had invited her to her house for dinner. It just so happened that Lin Chuwan had not been to her house for a long time either.
After parking the car, Bo Muyu took Lin Chuwan home. She sized up her thin body and said, “Sister Chuwan, you don’t seem to be in a good state. What’s wrong?”
Lin Chuwan was taken aback for a moment, then smiled. “Not at all. You have the nerve to say that to me? You’re the one who’s not in a good state.”
Bo Muyu looked down at her feet and smiled. “During this time, it’s better for me to be far away from Qinzhou than not. If possible, I’d even like to be away for a while longer.”
Lin Chuwan said with worry, “You can’t not come back forever. And if your abnormality persists for too long, your family will definitely notice.” She thought for a moment and asked, “She probably hasn’t let your family and friends know, right?”
“Mmm, she really hasn’t let anyone know.”
After that day, Bo Muyu had imagined many of Jiang Chenyin’s thoughts. She would distance herself from her, and even avoid her. But she had never thought that Jiang Chenyin would let her be hurt because of this. On this point, even if they could no longer be close, she had always firmly believed.
Lin Chuwan was at a loss for words for a moment and let out a soft sigh.
Seeing her sad look, Bo Muyu couldn’t help but laugh. “Sister Chuwan, why do you look so worried? I’ve already gotten over it, and you’re even more troubled than me.”
Lin Chuwan changed the subject and chided Bo Muyu, “If you had gotten over it, you wouldn’t still be thinking of running away.”
“There are many other important things in life,” Bo Muyu’s footsteps paused, and then she suddenly smiled. “I can’t be immersed in this emotion forever. She wouldn’t want me to be like this either.”
Lin Chuwan gazed at her. Those words clearly had a hint of no longer being attached, but the Bo Muyu who had said those words still had a deep sorrow in her eyes, and her smile was not as lively as before.
“Alright, let’s not talk about it. It’s almost time for dinner,” Bo Muyu said, stopping the topic from continuing, and reached out to take Lin Chuwan’s wrist, the corners of her lips curving up. “My dad is cooking personally. My mom just told me to hurry up and take you back for dinner.”
The change of topic almost made Lin Chuwan unable to keep up. She quickly followed her quickened pace and smiled. “Alright, alright. You walk slowly.”
At home, Ye Xialan pulled Lin Chuwan over and started to chatter, leaving Bo Muyu aside.
“Ah, Xiao Wan, you haven’t been here in a long time. You haven’t come to see your auntie since Xiaoyu started working.”
Lin Chuwan smiled. “I’ll definitely come often when I have time in the future.”
Ye Xialan cleared her throat and waved her hand. “That’s not what I mean. You’re older than Xiaoyu. You have more things to consider. I was just saying.”
“I don’t actually have much to do,” Lin Chuwan said with a soft laugh. “I usually just keep my mom company, or sometimes I’m just lazy and don’t want to go out.”
“You don’t have anything else?” Ye Xialan winked.
“What?” Lin Chuwan looked up at Bo Muyu, who was sitting on the single sofa, with a puzzled look. Bo Muyu shrugged.
“Oh, you don’t have a boyfriend?” Ye Xialan was even more puzzled than her.
“I…” Lin Chuwan laughed out loud. “Auntie, I don’t. You’re overthinking it.”
This time, the question mark above Ye Xialan’s head grew even bigger. She turned to look at Bo Muyu, and then back at Lin Chuwan. “What’s the situation now? Why are so many people not dating? I knew your Uncle Bo before I was even an adult.”
She hadn’t even finished, and Jiang Chenyin, who was in an almost otherworldly state, was one thing. Lan Yuxin, a woman who was at ease in the world of love, was also unwilling to date. And then there was Bo Muyu, well, she was busy with her career. Lin Chuwan was also at the right age, so beautiful, yet she was staying at home all day? Well, the Lin family’s detached villa was very large.
Lin Chuwan looked at Bo Muyu, then smiled at Ye Xialan. “Auntie, it’s not like that. There are still many people who are dating. It’s just that the people around you might just happen to be not planning to for now, just like me. I don’t have that thought yet either.”
“I feel like my thinking might not be able to keep up with you guys…” Ye Xialan patted her cheeks. “I think you don’t have to get married early, but you should start dating early. That way, you can get to know each other and see if you’re suitable for marriage.”
Lin Chuwan nodded thoughtfully and agreed, “Auntie is right. That’s the right way.”
Just then, Bo Muyu suddenly said coolly, “So, Mom, you didn’t plan to get married so early when you were pregnant with me, right?”
Ye Xialan blinked in a daze. “Uh…”
Lin Chuwan raised her hand to cover the smile on her lips. Bo Muyu’s way of changing the subject was very clever.
Ye Xialan reacted and leaned over to pinch her ear. “You little brat, you dare to mock your mother for getting pregnant before marriage! You’ve gotten a lot bolder after being away for a few months!”
“Hey, hey, hey… I didn’t… Mom, let go!” Bo Muyu was in so much pain that she grabbed Ye Xialan’s hand, which was pinching her ear, with both hands and kept begging for mercy.
“That’ll teach you to be so smug!” Ye Xialan let go with a pained heart, rubbed her ear for her, and softened her tone a little. “Does it hurt? The next time you’re so smug, I’ll pinch both your ears.”
How could it not hurt with such a strong grip? Bo Muyu didn’t dare to say another word and mumbled a couple of “mmms.” She didn’t want to be slapped on the back by Ye Xialan like her dad. Her bones would fall apart.
After rubbing it a couple of times, Ye Xialan asked, “We should ask your Auntie Yin over in a while.”
“Ah…” Bo Muyu was taken aback for a moment and didn’t answer. She couldn’t think of a way to change the subject for a moment.
Ye Xialan let out a couple of “tsks” and said, “I was originally going to ask her over today. I said that you were back and had rested well, so I wanted to ask her over for a meal, but she said she didn’t have time during this period.”
Bo Muyu instantly froze on the spot, a multitude of emotions surging like a tide.
If it were in the past, Jiang Chenyin would not have been so busy that she didn’t even have time to see her. On the contrary, she would have cleared her schedule to meet her. Just like when she was on a business trip in Lingzhou and had returned to the hotel to see Jiang Chenyin waiting there, and also the time she had been framed for plagiarism, Jiang Chenyin had changed her flight as soon as she had heard the news and had returned to Qinzhou early.
But now, Jiang Chenyin was unwilling to see her. Only she could feel this obvious avoidance.
Would they not even be able to have a normal conversation in the future? If they couldn’t avoid being alone under the same roof, would Jiang Chenyin be unwilling to even look at her?
Bo Muyu lowered her head and sniffled, her eyes stinging. She gripped her knees, at a loss.
Just then, Lin Chuwan’s smiling voice came over, “Auntie, although I don’t have any plans to date yet, we can discuss it.”
“Oh? You have a boy you like?” Ye Xialan’s attention was attracted, and she sat back on the long sofa.
“It’s hard to say yet. I don’t know yet.”
Bo Muyu raised her eyes slightly and saw that Ye Xialan had her back to her, while Lin Chuwan’s gaze would occasionally drift over. She understood what Lin Chuwan meant, gritted her teeth, and suppressed the pain in her heart, and then wiped away the little bit of moisture at the corners of her eyes.
After dinner, Bo Muyu made an excuse and went back to her room.
After chatting with Ye Xialan for a while, Lin Chuwan went to her room to find her, knocked on the door, and after getting permission, she opened it.
The lights in the room were not on. The curtains of the floor-to-ceiling window were drawn back. Bo Muyu was sitting on the edge of the bed, facing the window, the moonlight casting a cold light on her figure. The whole scene exuded a chilling coldness, quiet and lonely.
Lin Chuwan gently closed the door, walked over, and stopped in front of her. “Xiaoyu.”
Bo Muyu wiped her face and looked up with a smile. “Sister Chuwan, have you eaten your fill?”
“Mmm,” Lin Chuwan sat down beside her, hesitated, and then said softly, “Don’t be sad. If you really can’t help but think about it, we can go out for a walk and relax.”
Bo Muyu took a deep breath, and suddenly laughed, the laughter turning into a bitter smile. “Sister Chuwan, I never thought it would turn out like this. I don’t want this… I forced myself to be a little further away from her, a little further away from this city, just so that when we meet again one day, we can still smile at each other. But I’ve been away for so long, and now that I’m back, she’s still unwilling to see me…”
Her hands were clasped together, so tightly that her knuckles hurt. The tears that she had desperately suppressed in the living room just now were welling up in her eyes.
“Xiaoyu, she might have her own considerations,” Lin Chuwan said, hugging her with a pained heart and murmuring, “From the many things you’ve told me about you two, I really don’t believe that she would suddenly hate you after she found out that you like her. I’m more willing to believe that she has her own thoughts. Perhaps she is also keeping a distance between you two. She also needs time.”
The two of them, who had been so close before, had become like this. The river between them could not be crossed no matter what. Seeing Bo Muyu sad, Lin Chuwan’s heart also ached.
Bo Muyu shook her head, her eyes moist, her voice hoarse. “She won’t. She won’t see me again… she’s using this way to let me know that she’s unwilling to see me. She knows very well that I can feel it…”
“She will. She will see you,” Lin Chuwan’s eyes also turned red. She hugged Bo Muyu a little tighter, but other than that, she couldn’t do anything, couldn’t help with anything.
“Do you know? I sent her a message on her birthday,” Bo Muyu said, closing her eyes and hugging Lin Chuwan, her lips trembling violently, her voice a nasal murmur. “I considered it for a long time. Even if she replied with just one word, it would have been fine. But she was just like the day she left me. She didn’t give me a single word. She didn’t want me from that day on…”
They couldn’t go back. Jiang Chenyin would not let her get close again.
She had never regretted it more than now. How good it would have been if she could have hidden it better. In that case, she would still have what she would never lose. She could learn from Jiang Chenyin and then be with her forever.
Even if they did not have the title of lovers, at least she could still hold love in her heart and stay by Jiang Chenyin’s side.
Lin Chuwan gently stroked Bo Muyu’s head, closing her eyes to try and hold back her tears. This was the scene she least wanted to see. She hoped that Bo Muyu’s love would be smooth and happy, but in the end, it had still come to this.
