Chapter 11: Confession

Miao Zhu understood the implication in Sheng Xingran’s words, but she pretended not to.

Many times, she and Sheng Xingran had been just one step away from breaking through that final layer of window paper. But every time, Sheng Xingran had backed down.

Perhaps this time was no exception.

Sheng Xingran unconsciously tightened her grip on Miao Zhu’s hand, her lips parting and closing as if the words that followed were hard to voice.

“It was just one unpleasant incident, and it’s in the past now.” Miao Zhu deliberately glossed over the main point. Years of interaction had already exhausted her, and she had no desire for any entAngelment with Sheng Xingran beyond friendship.

But it backfired. Sheng Xingran’s eyes filled with grievance in an instant. She said urgently, “Longlong, you’re still mad at me, aren’t you? Those awful words—I lost control. I was jealous, so I spoke without thinking and hurt you. I just… I like you. I don’t want anyone else to appear in your world who could replace me!”

The words that had seemed impossibly difficult to say were finally out.

Sheng Xingran hadn’t had a good time these past couple of days.

Miao Ling was adept at flattery and currying favor with the powerful—Sheng Xingran had always looked down on her for it—but Ni Xiaoying, her own mother, wasn’t much nobler. Sheng Xingran had seen it all: how Ni Xiaoying fawned over the elders of the Mu Family, how she groveled before Mu Shanyi.

Because she wanted to study business, Ni Xiaoying didn’t speak to her for weeks. Because she wanted to visit her grandmother first during the New Year instead of the Mu Family’s matriarch, Ni Xiaoying cut off her credit card… There were too many instances like that, and each time, Sheng Xingran compromised, paying the price for her mother’s lowliness.

Many times, she looked at Miao Zhu like she was looking in a mirror—the two of them were like a pair of awkward clowns. Reason wouldn’t allow Sheng Xingran to fully open her heart to Miao Zhu. She couldn’t choose the family she was born into, but she could choose her future partner. She didn’t want her life to become a complete joke.

Yet she truly liked Miao Zhu.

Their relationship couldn’t advance further, and Sheng Xingran wasn’t content with that.

Nor could she distance herself, and Sheng Xingran wasn’t content with that either. She could accept her feelings remaining in a prolonged state of cooling, but she couldn’t accept Miao Zhu belonging to someone else. However, the current situation was that if she let go, Miao Ling would intensify her efforts to force Miao Zhu to “please” He Zizhou.

No one understood Miao Zhu’s predicament better than she did. For the first time, Sheng Xingran felt a real sense of crisis—she might truly lose Miao Zhu.

And Miao Zhu, aside from herself, had no one else to rely on.

Sheng Xingran tossed and turned sleeplessly until she received that call from Miao Ling the night before.

In the call, Miao Ling explained to her that the so-called date between Miao Zhu and He Zizhou was all a misunderstanding. The Miao Family had never intended to form a marriage alliance with the He Family. And Miao Zhu, distraught from their argument, had fallen seriously ill. At that moment, the scales in Sheng Xingran’s heart tipped.

What had Miao Zhu done wrong? Everything was beyond her control; she couldn’t choose who her mother was either.

Sheng Xingran kept asking herself: Could she give up her pride for Miao Zhu?

“Tulips are out of season, so they were hard to find… I thought I still had time, but time passed too quickly. I was afraid that if I was even a little later, you’d leave me.” Sheng Xingran seemed to fall back into that anxious state from not long ago. She rested her forehead on Miao Zhu’s knee, her voice muffled. “In the past, I was too willful. I didn’t give you any promises but demanded you stay by my side. I never considered your feelings. It’s right for you to be angry at me.”

“…Let’s start over. This time, I’ll be the one to please you.” Sheng Xingran lifted her face again, tears shimmering in her eyes. She had never shown weakness to Miao Zhu or been this honest with her. “Longlong, you can feel it—I like you. All these years, I’ve only liked you. Will you be my girlfriend?”

Miao Zhu’s eyes reddened too. Sheng Xingran had compromised her long-held knots for her sake. But she couldn’t bear it—that was Sheng Xingran’s self-indulgent emotion, not what she wanted.

Miao Zhu clearly realized that once the balance was broken, she and Sheng Xingran truly stood at a fork in the road leading to separation.

“The bleeding has stopped.” Miao Zhu withdrew her left hand from Sheng Xingran’s palm. “Xingran, don’t do this. Let’s just be friends, okay?”

Sheng Xingran believed Miao Zhu was just speaking out of anger. She had just said so many things that trampled on Miao Zhu’s dignity; of course Miao Zhu wasn’t over it yet, not to mention the debts from all these years that hadn’t been repaid. “I know the timing isn’t right. You’re still sick… We can take it slow. Starting from friends, I’ll pursue you. I—”

Knock, knock. Two unhurried knocks came from the door, interrupting Sheng Xingran’s heartfelt confession.

Miao Zhu was stunned.

The door was pushed open from outside two seconds later.

“Sorry, did I interrupt you two?” Facing the scene in the ward, Li Baozhu raised her brow with evident interest.

Sheng Xingran quickly wiped the tears from her eyes and stood up. “Sister Baozhu?”

Li Baozhu leaned against the doorframe, leisurely swinging the takeout bag in her hand. “I came to deliver a meal to Miss Miao.”

Sheng Xingran was puzzled. “You’re delivering her a meal? How do you two know each other?”

Li Baozhu: “A couple of days ago, you left her at my place. How do you think we know each other?”

Those words hit Sheng Xingran’s sore spot, leaving her speechless.

“She was getting treated at my place, so of course I had to take good care of her.” Li Baozhu smiled ambiguously. She walked to the dining table, moved the tulips Sheng Xingran had brought aside to make space, and set down the lunch she’d brought.

From the moment she appeared, Miao Zhu’s gaze hadn’t left her. Now with her back to Sheng Xingran, Li Baozhu winked at Miao Zhu.

“I don’t know if this food suits your taste, Miss Miao. Give it a try.” Li Baozhu opened the takeout bag. “Oh, I forgot to prepare a bowl of soup. I’ll go get you a glass of water instead. Make do for now, Miss Miao.”

“I’ll do it.” Given her closeness with Miao Zhu, Sheng Xingran certainly wouldn’t let an outsider handle this.

Having successfully sent Sheng Xingran away, Li Baozhu leaned over the table edge and said in a voice only she and Miao Zhu could hear, “She had an urgent assignment—an early morning flight. She probably hasn’t landed yet.”

Who “she” referred to went without saying.

Miao Zhu said nothing. Li Baozhu smiled again and returned to normal volume. “Miss Miao, I wish you a speedy recovery. I have another appointment next, so I’ll head out first.”

Things between her and Mu Shanyi hadn’t progressed to anything illicit, but Li Baozhu’s series of actions made it seem like they were sneaking around behind Sheng Xingran’s back.

Fortunately, thanks to this interlude, after Li Baozhu left, Sheng Xingran didn’t continue with the confession. But no matter what, she insisted on staying to take care of Miao Zhu.

Miao Zhu had originally planned to go straight home and rest after leaving the hospital, but she had to change her plans on the fly and say she had work to handle at the orchestra.

“And this.” Sheng Xingran drove Miao Zhu’s car to take her to the orchestra. While driving, she glanced a few more times at the Jade Peace Amulet hanging from the rearview mirror. “You like jade now?”

“For safety.” Miao Zhu nestled listlessly in the passenger seat.

Miao Zhu had just been rear-ended, so Sheng Xingran nodded in understanding but still nagged worriedly, “Tell me when you’re done with work, and I’ll come pick you up.”

Miao Zhu looked at her. “Xingran, you don’t need to do this.”

“You’re sick. No matter what decision you make, we’ll discuss it after you’re better. Until then, I’m still your closest friend, right?” The smile lines at Sheng Xingran’s lips deepened. “And Longlong, you’re rejecting me now. Don’t you think there’s something wrong with me? I like you like this even more—real, not hiding your emotions from me.”

?

…

Miao Zhu was certain she’d made a wrong move. She shouldn’t have handled things that way at the art exhibition party, and He Zizhou wasn’t the perfect choice she’d hoped for either.

Miao Zhu got out of the car outside the orchestra. Jiang Jingjing came over sipping freshly squeezed orange juice from a fruit shop. Catching sight of Sheng Xingran in Miao Zhu’s car out of the corner of her eye, she chased after and hooked an arm around Miao Zhu’s shoulder. “My ride-or-die bestie—turns out it was this young lady taking care of you?”

Having worked with Miao Zhu for two years, Jiang Jingjing had sensed the ambiguous, indefinable relationship between her and Sheng Xingran.

At that moment, her phone buzzed repeatedly. Miao Zhu flipped the screen.

[Mu Shanyi: Sorry, I broke my promise.]

[Mu Shanyi: How are you today? Feeling better?]

Author’s Note:

Others as the third wheel, Li Baozhu: Moral police [angry]

Bestie as the third wheel, Li Baozhu: Love nanny [cheer on]