Chapter 34: Eaves
The sky suddenly turned gloomy. The heavy clouds were like a ball of dough, and they were rising. The light was swallowed by the darkness, and the rainwater was accumulating. The feeling of being on the verge of falling was tormenting and was suppressing.
“When are you leaving?”
Xia Qiange was staring at the gloomy sky outside the window, and her toes were hooking her shoes and were gently swaying.
“I’ve booked a ticket for tomorrow. In the morning.”
“It seems that it’s going to rain heavily.”
She lowered her head and dealt with the thick porridge in her bowl. Her tone was a little schadenfreude. She used to deliberately bury her schemes, but now that she had seen through them, it was better to be direct. But she didn’t dare to be too much, for fear that he would really get tired of her.
“I’m not taking anything with me.”
“Haha.” She sneered twice, and the wooden spoon was stirring the porridge, which was mixed with minced meat. The rice grains were crushed into fine pieces, and she still had no appetite.
“Be careful, it’s hot. Blow on it before you drink it. It’s better for your stomach.”
“Yeah.”
“Are you tired of it?”, Su Yu saw that she had not taken a few bites and put down his bowl. “Then I’ll go to the wet market in a while. I’ll cook something else for dinner. I’m mainly worried that your stomach is not good…”
“Don’t be like this.”
She sat up, and her long black hair, which was up to her waist, was fluffy like a waterfall, which made her shoulders look even more thin and slender. “Su Yu, you’re just too good to me. You don’t owe me.”
“What do you mean, I don’t owe you? Are you not feeling well? Or is your stomach problem acting up again?”, he ignored the other party’s emotional outburst and stood up and walked over. He touched her forehead. “You always talk nonsense when you’re sick. This will only torture yourself.”
She closed her eyes and let him caress her cheek. The gaze that was on her eyelids was hot and gentle.
“People are spoiled. The better you are to me, the more I feel that this is what I should get. That’s why I can’t control myself like that. I’m like a time bomb. Maybe one day, we’ll die together.”
When she had said that, her tone was particularly fierce, like a lone wolf that was baring its fangs. Her whole body was covered in sharp thorns, and she had hurt him and had also hurt herself. The cold and distant look was slowly separating him.
Su Yu inexplicably remembered the time when the girl had held a knife to his chest. He thought that perhaps there was no need to go through this life again. The vitality had always been hidden in a certain turning point. If he had been able to control his emotions and had found the right one at that time.
“You’re really sick.”
“So you should leave quickly. Leave me. Before I change my mind.”
She suppressed the raging black emotions and looked up at him. Her face was as pale as a patient who had been sick for a long time and could not be cured. “I’m hopeless. Don’t waste your time.”
“If you’re sick, you should be treated. It will always get better.”
The rain suddenly fell, and the wind was making a fuss, and it was hitting the glass window with a pattering sound.
“But can you wait?!”
She suddenly lost control and flung away his hand, which was on her cheek. Her emotions were like a floodgate, and they were pouring out like a flash flood. The rain was pouring outside the window, and the wind was bending the branches. It was as if it were a sacrifice for the end of the world.
“People will always get annoyed, and they will get tired. It’s the same as my mother back then. Even the words you say are the same as the person my mother loved. I’m really about to go crazy like her. Sometimes I even hate myself for being so annoying.”
“I don’t want to be like her. I told myself to be good.” Xia Qiange lowered her head and covered her face with her hands. Her voice was muffled. “But I really don’t know… what’s wrong…”
Su Yu was stunned for a moment. His hand was in mid-air. He was not used to the girl’s rare and rough behavior. He sighed. “Why… don’t you always believe me?”
She didn’t want to answer him. They were like two intersecting lines. The temporary intersection was for a more cruel separation. He was good and kind, and she was terminally ill. They were completely two extremes, and neither of them could accommodate the other.
Xia Qiange lowered her eyes, and her head was buried between her legs. She didn’t want to hear a single word from him. It was as if the rain had seeped into the ceiling, and a thick and heavy curtain of rain was between the two of them. The sound of the rain was rushing past her ear, and she couldn’t hear the other party’s words clearly.
The clothes were still hanging outside…
“You be good first. I’ll be right back.”
He suddenly remembered, and the words were stuck at the tip of his tongue. He rushed to the balcony. He really didn’t have much luggage to take with him tomorrow. A bag, with a few seasonal clothes, was enough.
But the originally closed balcony window had been opened at some point, and the rain was blowing in with the wind. The clothes that were almost dry were already half-wet, and they were dripping down from the hem of the clothes. In this kind of weather, it was clear that they couldn’t be worn.
Su Yu suddenly understood. He sighed helplessly and roughly closed the window.
He turned back the way he had come, and he didn’t see her shadow in the living room. The bowl was on its side, and the porridge had spilled over half of the table.
…
The wind was mixed with the rain, and it was like a needle pricking his body. The fierce wind had brought the malice of this city, and his soaked clothes were bending his spine. The rainwater was flowing from his eyebrows and eyes, and it was over the bridge of his nose, and it had blurred his vision. Xia Qiange couldn’t see the road ahead clearly.
Why was she always afraid that he would leave, and that he would suddenly disappear?
The fear of losing was spreading over her, and it was far greater than the cost of believing. She was afraid of her mother’s fate. Her mother was a person who had no umbrella and had been kicked out of the eaves, and she could only be in the rain. The past had often warned her not to repeat the same mistake, but the future had come and had told her that it was okay.
She thought, it would be great if she were still the her of the past, the Xia Qiange who was looking up at the sun and was looking forward to everything, the her who had never liked anyone. She would definitely not be so cowardly. But what was that like? She seemed to have forgotten.
Xia Qiange turned her head in a daze and saw a person who was riding a bicycle and had fallen into a mud pit. She subconsciously walked a few steps in that direction and then saw that the person had quickly stood up from the rain and had lifted the bicycle and had crossed the mud pit. He had fallen in a mess of mud, and he had continued forward.
So she had wiped the water from her face and had looked at the passersby on the side of the road. Some were hiding under the eaves, waiting for the rain to stop. Some were holding umbrellas and were walking slowly. But more of them were people without umbrellas, and they were holding their heads and were running in the rain. They were stepping on the mud, and they were rushing into the misty and hazy road ahead.
Her body was trembling from the cold, and her face was cold and blue. She hugged her arms and curled up, and her consciousness was gray and white.
Later, the rain above her head had stopped, and an umbrella had stopped in front of her. Then his smell had come like a tide, and a warmth had rubbed against her forehead.
Xia Qiange raised her head with some bewilderment and met his wet eyes. He was also soaked to the skin, and his thick and smooth black hair was drooping in a mess, and he was breathing out a white mist when he was panting.
Su Yu fiercely wiped the water from his face, and his rushed breathing was in a mess in his chest. He looked at her almond-shaped and round eyes, which were slightly red. His hands were tightly held in his arms because of his guilt, and his slender shoulders were also shrunk, like a white rabbit that had lost its group.
“Let’s go back. You’ll catch a cold if you stay in the rain.”
She looked at him deeply, as if she wanted to engrave him in her heart again. Her pale lips were slightly parted, and her voice was soft and gentle.
“Oh…”, Xia Qiange lowered her head in a muffled voice, like a naive ghost who had been caught doing something wrong.
“Huh?”, Su Yu seemed to have not heard clearly. He smacked his lips and said, “The food I made is really not very good. You don’t have to be so angry next time the porridge is bad.”
She was stunned for a moment and tilted her head to look at him. There was suddenly a light in her eyes, and she couldn’t help but laugh.
Xia Qiange lowered her head and took a breath. Then she stood up in the rain and snatched the handle of the umbrella. She made half a space and pulled him, who was half in the rain, into the not-so-big umbrella.
The umbrella he had bought for her was a pale yellow, like a not-so-big eave.
She continued to look at the people who were running in the rain. Perhaps she was already lucky enough. Since the two of them were born to torture each other, why should they be so stubborn about the temporary instability? Even if they fell and were covered in mud, they could still live a good life after they had stood up.
“Let’s go home.”
She pulled at the corner of his clothes and said.
