Chapter 60: Jiangnan
The end of July, stuffy and humid.
Another sudden downpour had fallen last night. The raindrops, which were dripping from the eaves, were hitting the glass window with a patter, which was a little annoying. The stuffiness was blocked outside by the closed doors and windows. The air conditioner was set very low, and the cold and damp air was falling with a weight, and the limbs were a little stiff from the cold.
The sound of the mouse clicking on the screen was crisp and dull. He Mu Qing stared at the computer screen with a blank expression. The pale and cold light fell on her exquisite and beautiful face, creating a hazy halo.
Today was the day to fill out the university application after the college entrance examination. Tens of millions of college entrance examination students had to finalize the results of their three years of hard study today. It was a day that almost everyone was looking forward to.
Mother He had specially taken half a day off to stay at home and accompany her daughter to fill out the university application. Her rough palm was pressed heavily on her knee, and it was covered with sticky sweat. The congratulatory letter that the community had sent a while ago had not been opened for too long. The daughter, whose grades had always been mediocre, had now quietly taken the first place among the graduating students of Yangming High School. The red list that she had always envied in the school’s notice board now had her daughter’s name.
The bright red numbers that were printed on the screen on the day the results were released, now that she thought about it, it was like a dream. Father He was so happy that he went downstairs to get some wine. The person who had not touched wine for a long time could not be persuaded, and he was drunk.
She didn’t want her children to bear too much pressure, but which parents didn’t want their children to be successful? The next day after the results were released, Mother He saw the large patch of dark water stains on the pillow next to her, and the wrinkled bedding. The little bit of joy in her heart was instantly washed away by the tears that were seeping from the corners of her eyes.
Yes, how could the daughter who had not even been willing to do a set of practice questions before suddenly become so sensible? How could there be such a coincidence in this world? It was just that the seed had long since fallen into the soil and had taken root and sprouted. It had just broken through the soil at this time and had opened a fresh and naive flower bud, but it had died in a sudden rainy night.
He Mu Qing gently clicked the mouse and stopped at the first choice column. Her slender and fair hands were on the keyboard. She stared at the empty column for a long time, and the corners of her eyes were sore. Her vision was distorted and became a little blurry. She typed in the few words that had been repeatedly kneaded and re-glued in her heart.
First choice, Jiangnan University.
She turned her head and looked at her haggard mother behind her. She held the other party’s increasingly wrinkled palm and smiled, her smile still sweet and lovely, but it was a little less lively. Perhaps it was because she had grown up, but people always had to grow up.
“Mom, don’t worry. It will be fine.” He Mu Qing opened her arms and hugged her mother, and she let out a sigh of relief. “I want to go to Qingchuan to see him for the last time, to see the place where he lived.”
…
It was getting hotter and hotter as it was about to enter autumn. The rain was still drizzling, and it still couldn’t dispel the thick and stuffy heat in the air. She was holding a transparent umbrella and was walking on a long and gravel path. The hair on her forehead was soaked with sweat, and it was a little uncomfortable to have it stuck to her skin.
The boy was buried in a cemetery in the suburbs of the city. It was not far, but she had been unwilling to come, as if she were escaping. Something fresh and alive in her heart was still struggling and panting, wanting to get a little bit of hope, but it was deprived of its life the moment she had filled out the college entrance examination application, and it had died in an almost silent silence.
The cemetery was surrounded by tall and straight pines and cypresses, which were washed green by the rain. The raindrops hit the muddy ground on the side of the road and gathered into a larger stream of water, washing away the loose soil. The yellow and dim muddy water was flowing, as if it would roll up a turbulent mudslide, to completely wipe this piece of land from this world, to let everything return to good, including his cold tombstone.
He Mu Qing slowly stood in front of the tombstone. The new stone tablet was standing in front of her, and it formed a sharp and dazzling contrast with the old and dilapidated surroundings. She half-squatted down, but her gaze was always fixed on the column of almost cruel and profound inscriptions on the stone tablet.
She had practiced the smile countless times in the mirror in the taxi on her way here, but it was still a little deliberate and stiff when she put it on her face.
She didn’t know why she was acting for a person who was already buried in the yellow earth. But she just didn’t want to look too sad. The other party had always laughed at her for looking ugly when she cried. And she was really too fond of beauty at that time. She couldn’t accept a single flaw, and she had once stubbornly refused to cry in front of him.
Her fair and slender fingers gently caressed the dark gray stone tablet, as if it were separated by a chasm that crossed the yin and yang. She smiled, but her voice was a little trembling.
“Hey, I’ve graduated. I did pretty well. Um… I can go to Qingchuan University. But I suddenly don’t want to go to Qingchuan anymore. So I’m the one who didn’t keep my promise. I’m sorry.”
The square inscription in her field of vision suddenly became a little blurry, and the area around her eyes was clearly red. She didn’t care and continued to speak to herself in a muffled voice, as if she were being chased by time and was particularly urgent.
“And Old Mo, he didn’t come back for the summer vacation. You’d never guess. He found a training institution to be a painting teacher. He said he was going to start saving money to get married. He said he wanted us to be his best man and bridesmaid. But he still doesn’t know about you. I can’t believe that a person with such a free and easy personality would one day meet someone who would make him stop. By the way, and also…”
It was as if a floodgate had been opened. The things that had happened recently or that she hadn’t had time to finish saying before were all pouring out. She was talking and talking, and she curved her eyes and smiled again, which was a little contradictory with the redness in her eyes.
“I’m going to Jiangnan when school starts. I heard that the rainy season there is very long, and it rains for one-third of the year. I’m too lazy to go out on rainy days. But what if there’s a good milk tea shop nearby? I used to always ask you to go out and get me milk tea on rainy days. Now that I think about it, I was quite willful back then…”
“But you said that wasn’t willfulness, just that my thoughts were too direct and I couldn’t hide my words, which was why I always made people unhappy.”
He Mu Qing stared at the eye-catching name on the tombstone for a while longer. Her cherry-pink, thin lips were bitten a little white, and she was choking with a cry. “I’m not the one who can’t hide things. The ‘like’ in my heart, I’ve hidden it for so many years. You still couldn’t tell, right?”
A gust of wind, wrapped in a water mist, blew through the remote and cold mountain path. It lifted her hair, which had been cut short to her neck. The strands of hair gently fluttered with the wind and then slowly fell down. A patch of plain white skin was faintly visible in her dark hair, and the wetness at the corners of her eyes was also dried.
“Alright, I’m leaving. If I talk any longer, I’ll miss the train to Qingchuan.”
He Mu Qing slowly stood up. The corner of her eye caught a glimpse of a faint shadow at her feet. She followed the direction of the swaying figure and saw a pair of clean and white sneakers. Her gaze passed over the slender and straight legs, and she was stunned to meet the other person’s gaze.
“Xia… Qian Ge?”
“Yeah, you’re here to see him too. I just came back from Qingchuan, so I thought I’d come and see him first.”
Xia Qiange stood quietly behind He Mu Qing. Her old jeans were washed white, and her clothes still looked monotonous and boring. Her face was always a little sickly pale, and her frail figure was as if it couldn’t withstand a gust of wind in the mountains. Her eyebrows and eyes were lowered, but her eyes were as deep as the dark sky, and they were so dark that they were a little creepy, and not a single emotion could be seen. “Oh, then… then I’ll be going now.”
He Mu Qing came back to her senses. She was stammering and didn’t know what to say. There was not much of a conflict between the two of them. The secret rivalry had been shattered by this sudden car accident. But she was still unwilling to show weakness and wiped the red marks at the corners of her eyes before she lowered her head and prepared to leave.
“Um…”
Xia Qiange stood there without moving. When the girl brushed past her, she slightly pulled at the corner of her clothes. She moved her thin, red and pale lips and whispered in the girl’s ear. Her tone was a little cold, but it was filled with an indescribable sadness.
“My condolences.”
