Chapter 43
There was some distance from the main house of the Jiang family to the garage. Fine snow drifted in the sky. Meng Yi’an walked in front of Jiang Chenyin, the two of them moving one after the other.
They stopped together at the garage entrance, and Meng Yi’an turned to face Jiang Chenyin.
In the moonlight, Jiang Chenyin was dressed in a white wool coat, her figure still straight and slender, her face as stunning as a peach blossom, her aura elegant. A single glance was enough to leave a deep impression.
This scene reminded Meng Yi’an of Yu Kwang-chung’s poem “Peerless Beauty,” and the line that best reflected his mood at this moment was: “Between the moonlight and the snow, you are the third kind of peerless beauty.”
He looked at Jiang Chenyin deeply, his eyes filled with obvious affection and a hint of nostalgia for the past.
“Be careful driving on the road,” Jiang Chenyin said with a smile. “Although the snow scene is beautiful, snowy days are always a hassle. So, as a friend, I’m very grateful that you could come.”
Meng Yi’an’s eyes were filled with her, and even his tone softened. “I should also thank you for the invitation. I was very lucky to experience that Brother Jun’s culinary skills have improved again.”
“Is that so?” Jiang Chenyin said with a slightly surprised smile. “I’ve probably been coming back to eat my second brother’s cooking so often lately that I haven’t even noticed.”
“Oh? Then I’ll have to speak up for Brother Jun,” Meng Yi’an chuckled in a low voice. “As a famous chef, it’s so sad that even his own sister can’t tell that his culinary skills have improved.”
Jiang Chenyin thought for a moment and said softly, “Then perhaps it’s because his cooking was already very delicious before. You haven’t had it in a long time, so you feel that it has improved.”
As her thoughts shifted, she had pursed her lips and blinked, a hint of playfulness in her expression.
“Chenyin, can we only be friends?” Meng Yi’an finally couldn’t help but take a step forward. “You know very well that I still love you. It has never changed.”
The smile in Jiang Chenyin’s eyes faded a little, and she shook her head gently. “Yi’an, so many years have passed. We should both look forward. No one can go back to the past. Besides, the problems we didn’t solve back then still exist. Even if we get back together, it’s inevitable that it will happen again.”
A look of guilt appeared on Meng Yi’an’s face. “No, if I hadn’t said what I shouldn’t have said that year, we wouldn’t be like this.”
“Do you think I would never have understood if you hadn’t brought it up?” Jiang Chenyin’s lips curved up slightly, her gaze unwavering. “Even if you didn’t bring it up, I would have understood sooner or later that I don’t love you. My feelings for you did not deepen during our time together, not enough to support our relationship continuing. I believe you are also very clear about this.”
“Chenyin,” Meng Yi’an’s eyes were filled with pain. “I don’t want this. Can you please reconsider?”
Jiang Chenyin smiled. “What I’m telling you today is the final result of my consideration.”
Meng Yi’an’s voice was a little hoarse. “Chenyin…”
Jiang Chenyin looked at him. “I’m very sorry. It was like this back then, and it’s the same today.”
Meng Yi’an could only smile bitterly.
Her gaze was gentle, as if she were treating every friend, as if she would never get angry, like a perfect listener. She treated him as just another friend, nothing special, and would not treat him with any particular gentleness.
Perhaps he was not even as good as a friend. Lan Yuxin and Ye Xialan could at least listen to her thoughts and share her life with her. But he was in an awkward position, still holding the title of “friend.”
He suddenly felt a little annoyed. If they hadn’t gotten together back then, would things not have turned out like this?
“You should go back. The roads are not safe at night. I should go back too. Muyu is probably waiting to wish me a happy birthday,” Jiang Chenyin said, reminding him. The conversation was over. It was time to end it.
“Then I’ll be going. If there’s a chance, let’s meet again,” Meng Yi’an sighed deeply, realizing that he couldn’t take another step forward.
“Okay,” Jiang Chenyin agreed with a smile.
But there would be no more opportunities to meet after today. She had already said this much. There was no need for her and Meng Yi’an to meet for work, and their so-called friendship was a bit awkward.
Jiang Chenyin watched Meng Yi’an drive away and only then breathed a sigh of relief.
She and Meng Yi’an had made things very clear long ago. Unfortunately, Meng Yi’an’s feelings were deeper than hers. She had let go, but Meng Yi’an had never let go, and it had gradually become an obsession from which he could not extricate himself.
She didn’t know if this time would be enough to make Meng Yi’an stop trying to win her back. If he still didn’t relent, the situation that would follow was something no one wanted to see.
Jiang Chenyin returned to her room in deep thought. When she opened the door, she saw Bo Muyu sitting on the edge of the bed, her hands on the mattress, her legs swinging slightly, her eyes fixed on the door.
Seeing Jiang Chenyin come in, the corners of Bo Muyu’s lips curved up. “Auntie Yin.”
“Did you just come from your parents’ room?” Jiang Chenyin asked as she took off her coat and hung it up.
“Mmm, I took a piece of cake over to eat,” Bo Muyu said, licking her lips as if reminiscing about the taste of the cake.
Just now, in Bo Mingliang and Ye Xialan’s room, after Bo Muyu had said that Jiang Chenyin would not be with Meng Yi’an, Ye Xialan had turned her head in surprise and asked her how she knew.
She had briefly told Ye Xialan that Jiang Chenyin did not love Meng Yi’an, so they couldn’t be together. It was like this before, and it was the same now. And Jiang Chenyin had said that she didn’t dare to try again, for fear of hurting others.
After hearing this, Ye Xialan had murmured to herself, “Still not willing to try… so it’s really like this.”
Bo Muyu had not said any more. After finishing the cake, she had been shooed out of the room by Ye Xialan, who had told her to go to another guest room or to find Jiang Chenyin.
After hanging up her clothes, Jiang Chenyin sat down beside her. Her hands, having just come in from the outside, were a little cold. When they touched her hand, it felt extremely warm.
Bo Muyu turned to the side and sat, holding Jiang Chenyin’s hands in her own, trying to wrap them in her palms as much as possible.
Jiang Chenyin glanced at her, who had her head slightly lowered, and said with a smile, “Was the cake good tonight?”
“It was good. Very sweet,” Bo Muyu said, looking up with a smile, like a cat that had successfully stolen a fish.
Jiang Chenyin reached out and pinched Bo Muyu’s cheek. “You little glutton. All you think about all day is eating sweets.”
She was not as fond of sweets as Bo Muyu, but seeing how happy Bo Muyu was after eating them, she felt as if she had also eaten something sweet, a sense of satisfaction welling up in her heart.
It was as if she didn’t need to taste the sweets herself. Just seeing Bo Muyu’s joy was enough. Compared to the sweetness her taste buds felt, she preferred this kind.
Bo Muyu continued to touch her hand with her head down, her thumb gently stroking her knuckles as she asked, “Did that uncle really bring it up with you?”
Jiang Chenyin sighed softly. “Mmm, he did. And I told him my answer.”
Bo Muyu’s thumb stopped moving, and her other four fingers slipped into Jiang Chenyin’s palm.
As their hands were clasped, Bo Muyu looked up with a calm expression. “I wonder if this rejection will work. It’s been so many years since you broke up, but he has never given up trying to win you back. I’ve heard people say that it’s very difficult to wait for someone for a long time.”
Listening to Jiang Chenyin’s slightly melancholic voice, she could imagine that the conversation between her and Meng Yi’an just now must not have been very pleasant, otherwise she wouldn’t be like this.
But at the same time, she was also very relieved by what Jiang Chenyin had said. From the way she had seen Jiang Chenyin being distant with Meng Yi’an, she could tell what her attitude had been just now. She just didn’t know how much this would hurt Meng Yi’an, and if it would hurt him enough to let go.
When Jiang Chenyin heard her first two sentences, her brow furrowed. After she finished, she was silent for a moment, then her brow relaxed, and a faint smile appeared on her lips. “It probably won’t happen again. I made it very clear.”
Bo Muyu’s expression was placid. “Hmm?”
Jiang Chenyin said, “I told him that the problems from before have not been solved. Even if we get back together, it will happen again.”
Only then did Bo Muyu’s expression relax, and she nodded.
Jiang Chenyin reached out and stroked her head. “If I had liked him enough back then, we wouldn’t have broken up, and he wouldn’t have felt unloved.”
Bo Muyu was relieved. “So your feelings for him were not deep enough.”
Jiang Chenyin nodded. “Mmm, there were feelings, but not deep enough, and they didn’t deepen during our time together.”
Her hand was on Bo Muyu’s head, and the fragrance of her hair wafted over. Bo Muyu couldn’t help but lean forward and hug her.
Jiang Chenyin naturally wrapped her arms around her and asked with a smile, “Were you worried just now that I couldn’t handle it well?”
“Of course not,” Bo Muyu replied without hesitation. “I was just afraid that he wouldn’t be willing to leave just like that. After all, he’s waited for so many years.”
“So that’s also why I’ve always felt a little guilty towards him,” Jiang Chenyin understood in her heart the principle of pulling away in time if she couldn’t give what was wanted, but after all, she had left Meng Yi’an alone for many years, so there was still some psychological burden.
“What about me?” Bo Muyu looked up and gazed at her. “I started waiting for you to come back from the moment you went abroad. I even thought you would never come back. During the holidays, the news I wanted to hear the most was never about who had sent something to our family, or what you had sent me. I just wanted you to come back. But while I was waiting for you to come back, I also felt that you might not. As time went on, disappointment always outweighed hope.”
Jiang Chenyin’s heart trembled almost at the same time as Bo Muyu spoke. Bo Muyu rarely told her about her emotions during those years. Although she knew that Bo Muyu must have been very sad, she couldn’t think about the details.
Now, pondering these words, the thought that every time she had sent something to Bo Muyu in those years, it hadn’t made her happy but had been like sending a knife, made Jiang Chenyin’s eyes sting.
She thought of how after every phone call, Bo Muyu would always be thinking in her heart about when she would come back.
She thought of how every time she showed concern for Bo Muyu, this child would always reminisce about the days when she hadn’t left.
She thought of how after she had been away for a while, Bo Muyu could have directly asked Ye Xialan about her return date, but because she had asked too many times, she had become hesitant.
She couldn’t think about it anymore. It was as if a blunt knife was slowly grinding at her heart.
“I’m sorry,” she said, tightening her arms around Bo Muyu, her voice a little hoarse. “How could I not feel guilty towards you? I’ve thought about coming back countless times, but I couldn’t. I could only hope that you would make more friends after you went to university and share the time you had for me with others.”
“That’s impossible,” Bo Muyu couldn’t help but pull away from her embrace, her gaze cold.
“I know,” Jiang Chenyin’s lips curved up.
“I’m not telling you this to make you feel guilty,” Bo Muyu suddenly said. “I just want you to know that everyone has their own choices. No matter what decision you make, you can’t blame it on others. So don’t feel guilty for that uncle. You’ve already done what you should have done.”
Jiang Chenyin looked at her in surprise, once again feeling that she was being very sensible about this matter, and even the principles she spoke of were very clear and explicit.
Bo Muyu paused, then continued, “Just like me. Waiting for you to come back was also my choice.”
Gao Yan had persisted in his pursuit despite Jiang Chenyin’s rejection back then. Meng Yi’an had been alone for many years trying to win her back. It seemed he didn’t care if Jiang Chenyin still liked him now. And then there was Yang Qian at the company. She had been accused of “hurting” him just for rejecting his invitations.
But in the years Jiang Chenyin was away, she had never made a fuss, because what she wanted was for Jiang Chenyin to be willing to come back on her own.
Letting nature take its course was the most comfortable. Bo Muyu finally understood this deeply at this moment.
After hearing her speak with such a serious face, Jiang Chenyin was taken aback for a moment, and then her eyes were filled with tenderness. She pinched her nose and said, “Why are you so good with words tonight? Is it because the cake was too sweet?”
Bo Muyu, whose heart was at ease, smiled, and her cute little canine teeth appeared before Jiang Chenyin. “It was indeed very sweet. You didn’t eat much.”
Jiang Chenyin lamented, “Can you imagine how old I am after this birthday? How can I eat so many sweets?”
Bo Muyu’s gaze didn’t waver. “No matter how old you are, you’re still the same as before. I told you that last time. I don’t know about others, but this is the you in my eyes.”
Jiang Chenyin’s eyes were filled with warmth, and the corners of her lips couldn’t help but lift. She felt that she was about to be so charmed by this girl, who didn’t even know the meaning of the word “subtle,” that she wouldn’t know which way was up.
“Alright,” Jiang Chenyin sighed and said with a laugh, “I feel like you’re even sweeter than the cake.”
Bo Muyu said no more and obediently leaned against her shoulder.
A thought stirred in Jiang Chenyin’s heart, and she said, “I told that uncle just now that you were waiting in the room to wish me a happy birthday.”
Bo Muyu looked up in understanding and said in a clear, gentle voice, “Auntie Yin, happy birthday.”
Jiang Chenyin’s lips curved up in satisfaction. This birthday was perfect.
