Chapter 63

Out of Control

Shen Han described this characteristic to Li Zhao.

Li Zhao tsked, propped both hands on the railing, and said, “She’s still so young, her thoughts aren’t mature yet, who she likes isn’t certain. I think she’s pretty special to you too… Or why don’t you try being kiss buddies with her?”

At this, Li Zhao turned back with a completely unserious look and smiled at Shen Han. “I think it’s doable. Anyway, you’ll suffer at most a minor loss. You’re not officially together, so no need to worry that if you break up, your relationship with the Su Family might change.”

Shen Han: “…”

Her throat moved slightly. She couldn’t help but recall the two times she had touched her, but she still averted her eyes and looked into the night, saying faintly, “This is very irresponsible.”

Li Zhao sighed. “Got it, you iron tree blooming—truly rare… Go after her, for real. She’s also very special to you. At most, there are some misunderstandings, which can all be resolved. Try asking her out to play more. I’ll be your Dog Head Military Advisor, give you some ideas, and by the way, help hold Xu Nanqiao back. The pay only needs to be a quarter of a private doctor’s salary.”

Shen Han didn’t quite understand several of the messy phrases in Li Zhao’s words and felt she wasn’t reliable.

Li Zhao paused, still very curious. She leaned in to gossip. “Impertinent question: how did you realize you like her?”

To be honest, Li Zhao had never thought Shen Han would actually fall for anyone. According to the test results from the psychological intervention before, Shen Han seemed to have completely cut love out of her world. Li Zhao had been the helper who freed her from that pain.

She hadn’t expected such an everyday person like Su Mi to break through it.

Li Zhao really couldn’t figure out what Shen Han liked about Su Mi. No matter from which angle, Su Mi didn’t match at all. She was pretty, sure, but Prime City was full of pretty girls. Her personality didn’t have any particularly outstanding highlights either. That dazed, cute, and fun personality, plus just turning adult without any stability, made her better as an amusing little sister by one’s side than as a partner.

Especially since, in Shen Han’s eyes, she probably hadn’t been exposed yet as a Beta. Li Zhao had always believed that the last thing Shen Han would choose was a Beta—not to mention that crazy Old Madam Shen. If she found out… Terrifying.

She shuddered just thinking about it.

Li Zhao asked curiously, “How far have you two gone? I just remember you princess-carrying her last time. Or did something happen in Haicheng?”

She rambled on, her words full of the familiarity and trust toward a longtime friend. “Forget it, I’ll give you free advice. With the upbringing your family gave you, chasing that kind of lively little girl will definitely be hard. Do you even wait for her to agree before kissing? That’s why I think you might be mistaken. Sometimes, when you see someone whose personality is very opposite to yours, the feeling in your heart isn’t necessarily like…”

Li Zhao kept babbling on. Shen Han listened in silence.

Her lips slowly pressed into a straight line, suddenly feeling a bit awkward.

She turned her head, interrupting her friend’s nagging, and said uncomfortably, “…Not exactly.”

Li Zhao looked at her in confusion.

Shen Han coughed lightly and closed her eyes. Though she was used to confiding her recent situation to Li Zhao in the treatment room, out here in the breezy university campus at night, it was still a bit hard to speak of.

She said slowly, “…I realized that I would… sometimes lose control.”

Just as the Shen Family had educated her as the heir with everything they gave her—from the etiquette, conduct, morals, and rationality drilled into her bones from childhood.

Sometimes, looking at Su Mi made her lose control. She wanted to do impolite, uncontrolled, barbaric things.

These impulses manifested in various unusual behaviors, whether deliberately suppressing herself from paying attention, abnormally fixating on her unexpectedly, or releasing mental power laced with pheromones to touch her—or like tonight’s rudeness and loss of control.

Shen Han didn’t know if this was the Alpha’s instinct for plunder and possession at work.

Faced with these instinct-like feelings that suddenly appeared in her heart, Shen Han felt some deliberate suppression, some anxiety, and some indulgence.

She only gave this one sentence, then suppressed the other thoughts, lowered her eyelashes, and said no more.

She couldn’t say more.

Actually, she knew how Su Mi saw her most of the time.

There was some fear, but also trust—perhaps even more than her trust in Uncle and Aunt. Often, the fear toward her was fake, just putting on a show. Like a little beast familiar with and trusting this territory, frolicking freely.

Of course, there were other things that made her think it was like.

In short, she was unguarded toward her, always like a puppy frankly exposing its belly and wagging its tail.

Part of it might be trust—in her upbringing, character, and morals. No matter what, she wouldn’t do anything excessive.

Uncle and Aunt probably had no intention of marrying Su Mi off. With the Shen Family as a big backer, they likely supported Su Mi’s free love and hadn’t taught her much about gender or lineage education.

But Shen Han knew. As the sole heir of a top-tier family like the Shen Family, she had undergone detailed private gender testing very young, confirmed as 100% Alpha with extremely high mental power. Her different accelerated study path and early rich gender knowledge education.

If all went smoothly, after finishing university and coming of age, she would differentiate into an Alpha, take over Shen Corporation affairs, and like most upper-class Alphas, start interacting with different Omegas. Everyone did it. The ABO equality concept, already a societal norm, didn’t apply to the upper class. Alphas were still dominant, and how to play was a required course.

So Shen Han knew a lot. Before, this knowledge had just been ignored, tucked in a corner of memory. But after Su Mi differentiated, sometimes looking at Su Mi—her curious probing look, or her ignorant subconscious dodging—would abruptly bring up things she had learned, stirring some inferior Alpha thoughts. How to bind the Omega one wanted, like dressing her in tight leather, breaking her shame, dark confinement or caged placement, completely isolating her from the outside, occupying her mind, turning her fully into one’s possession. Southern Garden had such perfectly equipped basements.

When Alpha plunder and possession instincts surged, she would bite the flesh inside her mouth, using the pain to slowly dispel the inappropriate thoughts. For example, if she really did something, treating her like a saintly little sister or pretty puppy eyes should well up with tears, lips and eye corners water-red, looking at her in disbelief and brokenness, then slowly trained into a real little dog.

But there was no need.

Not long ago in the private washroom, Su Mi, trapped in front of her, had carefully shifted sideways to escape. The speed was like a turtle to an Alpha’s eyes. She turned to slip away, her bare hollowed back—completely controlled during the dance—rubbed red marks by the marble counter. Shen Han’s gaze lingered, then she looked down at the handkerchief in her hand, still bearing some wet traces.

Like Su Mi’s tear tracks. At the time, Shen Han had thought she didn’t want to see Su Mi cry.

Of course, that was just a thought. Shen Han knew her actions so far were limited to petting a puppy’s belly. Anything more was unlikely.

Li Zhao was very interested in the loss of control Shen Han mentioned.

She looked at Shen Han with keen interest, interrupting her own rambling topic, clearly interpreting it in another direction.

“Out of control? What kind? Pheromones? Mental power? Did you release your pheromone scent in front of her? Can you smell her scent?”

A barrage of questions hit Shen Han.

Shen Han: “She’s a Beta. How could she have a scent?”

There were surgical methods to make Betas emit pheromones via glands, but pure natural Betas had no scent.

Li Zhao hummed, not planning to preemptively expose someone else’s privacy. Instead, she said obliquely, “Betas with strong mental power might be able to smell pheromones.”

At this, Shen Han remembered something and said, “That Barrier Earring she wears—is it a mental power issue?”

Li Zhao: “…I don’t think she wears the Barrier Earring necessarily because of mental power.”

Shen Han said seriously, “I had Secretary Zhuang check her differentiation results. Other info has traces, but the mental power test report is blank. Might be an issue. After she does the mental power test, I’ll bring it to you. We can do relief and repair together?”

Li Zhao: “How will you get her to do it? Will she agree?”

Shen Han shook her head faintly. “They test mental power upon entering the professional lab. Shen Corporation collaborates with their lab. I’ll have someone watch ahead of time.”

Li Zhao let out a “whoa” and asked, “When does she enter the lab? Want me to get her Class Schedule from Xu Nanqiao?”

Class Schedule. After saying it, Li Zhao pondered and found the term quite novel.

Shen Han: “…No need. I’ll ask her myself.”

Li Zhao snickered. “You basically confessed already, and she’ll still give it to you? Fine, I’ll send you some good date spots first…”

.

When the Light Brain notification popped up asking for her Class Schedule from Shen Han, Su Mi had just finished her shower and was lying on her back at the bed’s edge, spacing out.

Her freshly washed hair draped wet over the bed edge. The world in the dorm looked upside down to her.

At the opposite desk, under warm yellow light, Xu Nanqiao was preparing for tomorrow’s classes.

By rights, Su Mi should preview like Xu Nanqiao before bed.

But facing the blank writing board on her Light Brain, she couldn’t sort out a single idea.

Where exactly did she go wrong…!

The moment the message popped, Su Mi nearly jumped in fright, almost leaping off the bed.

It also drew Xu Nanqiao’s attention. She turned back strangely and said, “Su Su, you okay?”

Su Mi: “…N-No, nothing.”

Looking at Xu Nanqiao now, she felt an odd guilt.

She subconsciously ignored Shen Han’s message.

Her words to Xu Nanqiao came out stuttered. After hesitating a while, she still couldn’t hold back and asked, “Nanqiao, um… Do you have anyone you like?”

Xu Nanqiao blinked and said naturally, “No.”

Su Mi: “…What about my sister? You’ve been meeting frequently lately. Any sparks when alone?”

Xu Nanqiao touched her face hesitantly. “No… Isn’t this just another part-time job?”

Anoth-er part-time job.

Su Mi struggled desperately, climbed up, gripped the bed rail, and asked, “But she’s special to you. Really no thoughts at all?”

Xu Nanqiao thought seriously. “No thoughts.”

Su Mi: “…”

Xu Nanqiao said puzzled, “Didn’t you ask something similar before… Su Su, you don’t think I’d suit your sister, do you?”

Su Mi: “Pretty suitable…”

Xu Nanqiao chuckled. “Where? An Alpha raised in that kind of family has surely gone through plenty of Omegas and Betas, seen it all. How could she look at me? Besides, I don’t have those intentions. You know me—right now, just focusing on studying well, saving money, and later finding someone well-matched.”

Su Mi subconsciously retorted, “Don’t sell yourself short. You’re excellent. This era has no talk of matching or not. I’m from a rich family too. When we go out, you handle it so naturally…”

Xu Nanqiao: “You playing matchmaker?”

Su Mi muttered softly, “…And my sister might not be the ‘seen it all’ type you say. In the time we’ve known her, no one’s been around her.”

Xu Nanqiao chuckled, stood, walked to her bed, and soothingly patted her head.

“Might be my preconceptions. Su Su, my birth father was probably that kind of upper-class Alpha, so I… yeah, I do resist such families.”

Not sure where she got the info, but Xu Nanqiao simply told Su Mi about some classmates’ family marriage situations they both knew.

Su Mi was stunned. She hadn’t expected Xu Nanqiao to suddenly open up like this.

She opened her mouth and said softly, “Sorry, I didn’t mean anything else.”

Xu Nanqiao chuckled and patted her again. “Sorry for what? Don’t think about this nonsense. Dry your hair and sleep early.”

Su Mi obediently said okay.

She shrank into her bed.

Her mood was totally wrecked.

Wrecked! Wrecked!

She had thought it through so well before. With Shen Han’s Blackening Value dropping smoothly and Xu Nanqiao not too resistant, the two could smoothly get together in university.

As a result, Xu Nanqiao’s progress was refreshingly zero.

If Shen Han could be enlightened and willing to pursue her, the task might actually be pretty easy to complete.

But the problem was, Shen Han… was inexplicably going nuts.

Xu Nanqiao had spent plenty of time with Shen Han—probably even more than Su Mi, the latecomer—and understood her better. Was she serious?

Su Mi reviewed everything in her mind. The more she thought about it, the more she felt that Shen Han really wasn’t all that serious.

Before, she’d been so rash with her pheromones… on Su Mi’s tongue.

Even in the Southern Garden, she’d hugged her and invited her to sleep together.

It seemed like Shen Han never lacked for beauties around her either—like that beautiful host in Haicheng. The two of them had stayed so close for most of the evening. When Su Mi walked in, Shen Han was still helping her try on jewelry.

And today, she’d even kissed Su Mi in the dark, then acted like nothing happened afterward. She’d wanted to keep kissing in the private washroom… probably.

Was it really that Su Mi didn’t understand Shen Han well enough? When Su Mi had followed Su Ciyu to some banquets, she’d been introduced to plenty of peers, men and women alike. Looking back now, none of them had been particularly serious. It seemed like in Prime City’s upper circles—or really, in the ABO world—being casual about relationships was just the norm. People from Lolan Academy were even worse.

Which meant Shen Han’s good friend Li Zhao was the same kind of unserious type. As the saying went, birds of a feather flock together…

Su Mi’s thoughts were a total mess. Then she remembered that Su Ciyu and Wen Zisu seemed pretty decent—their relationship was stable, no messing around. She couldn’t just paint the entire Prime City upper circle with the same brush.

Sigh. What exactly did Shen Han mean? Had she lost interest in Xu Nanqiao so quickly?

Su Mi was already very close with Xu Nanqiao and considered her a good friend.

If Shen Han was really that fickle, Su Mi would feel guilty trying to matchmake them again.

Su Mi didn’t even dare to open her light brain, afraid she’d see another message from Shen Han.

She lay on the bed and silently covered her face. After hesitating for a long time, she called out the System.

Su Mi asked tremulously, “Sys… If—I mean if—the Female Lead can’t end up with the Antagonist, is it still possible to complete the task?”