Luo Qingmeng stayed at her place for a long time. Qiu Shuxue always found ways to lure her to whatever spots she desired. With just a few words, she would coax her into looking here and there. At first, Luo Qingmeng resisted strongly, but once she started turning a blind eye, she grew accustomed to it. It was truly awful.
In the end, Luo Qingmeng still fled because she had dirtied the floor. She thought Qiu Shuxue had gone too far, while Qiu Shuxue thought she was excessively beautiful. The two of them simply couldn’t see eye to eye.
When she slipped away, she did so furtively, inwardly cursing her a pervert.
Back in her room, Luo Qingmeng remembered her promise to Qiu Shuxue and began selecting a gift to give her. Luo Qingmeng didn’t have as many books as Qiu Shuxue, but they filled an entire wall of neat shelves. Most were trial copies from the bookstore; sometimes the boss would tell her to dispose of ones that were too worn. Others were ones she had loved so much that she bought an unopened copy just to display on the shelf. She stood before her bookshelf, making her selection.
She owned no hardcovers because she had always rented places, and lugging books around when moving was inconvenient. With her limited finances, she couldn’t afford fancy editions either. She only brought along her absolute favorites, the ones she reread countless times—even the ones she bought for collection eventually grew worn with age.
She pondered what to give Qiu Shuxue. As a translator, perhaps foreign books like 1984 or Animal Farm, or other Nobel Prize-winning literature? After mulling it over, she settled for the second time on a book tucked away in the farthest corner of her shelf: Mr. Toad Goes to See a Psychologist.
Why was it suitable?
Luo Qingmeng recalled Qiu Shuxue’s earlier sob story—how no one at home looked after her, how the nanny fed her cold leftovers while bringing her own child over to enjoy the comforts and making Qiu Shuxue suffer.
Qiu Shuxue’s odd, prickly personality was probably tied to her childhood, Luo Qingmeng figured. She believed Qiu Shuxue should read it—not necessarily to heal herself or forgive anyone, but simply to make peace with her own past.
Luo Qingmeng had filled the book with notes from her school days, her handwriting far messier than it was now. It had accompanied her through all of high school and then through a decade of ups and downs in the city.
Whenever she felt worn out, she would pull it out to read. The notes ranged from fresh to faded.
She slipped the book into a dust bag. Then she opened a mini-program and ordered a hardcover edition of The Wind in the Willows. Luo Qingmeng always felt it wasn’t right to give only a used book—who sent someone a secondhand birthday gift, after all?
After resting for the night, she headed to work very early the next morning. She didn’t wait for Qiu Shuxue’s car and took the subway instead. She felt queasy and unsteady the whole way, thoroughly off-kilter.
When she arrived at the bookstore, she went straight to redeem her coupon for the book.
She rose up on tiptoe—and then it hit her.
It was as if she’d been played to the point of breaking.
Chen Xin was busy shelving books and noticed her standing there frozen. Something seemed off about her, though her complexion and aura were vibrant—unlike the lifeless pallor of the past few days.
Luo Qingmeng returned to the cashier counter. Chen Xin sauntered over, plucked the earbuds from her ears, and popped them into her own. Luo Qingmeng frowned, shooting her a displeased look. Chen Xin tsked and asked what she was listening to. Then she went, “Oh, English? I’ll find you some study materials—my roommate specializes in business English.”
Luo Qingmeng had been about to snap at her for taking the earbuds, but considering the offer of materials, she said instead, “Thanks.”
“I’ll recommend some movies too—British short animations. Simple and practical. I watched them a lot while prepping for CET-4 and CET-6.”
“Thanks.”
Chen Xin didn’t ask why she was studying it. Luo Qingmeng figured it was probably because the whole world had gone mad with competition—nothing suspicious about her picking up a skill too.
From her very first day on the job, Chen Xin had held Luo Qingmeng in high regard. She thought she was hiding her light under a bushel, pure gold. She kept urging her to find work with room to advance—maybe start as a shift lead, then move up to manager or even store manager during interviews.
Sometimes she even suggested taking the civil service exam, or at least applying for a low-level government position. Contract work was pretty good too.
Luo Qingmeng wasn’t stubbornly resistant to change. She just genuinely loved books. A high-achieving recent grad like Chen Xin probably couldn’t understand her preference for a quiet, stable little life.
More importantly, she had no home of her own in this city, nowhere to truly settle down. Everything had veered wildly off course from her original plans—marriage had upended her life completely.
Who knew where she’d drift after turning twenty-eight, twenty-nine, thirty? Would it still be this city?
“Sis, have you actually gotten divorced or what?” Chen Xin started prying again.
Luo Qingmeng glanced up at her. She sat down in her chair. Since she’d bought a book, she could help herself to the freebies—mostly bubble stickers that kids and college students liked. She grabbed a few and tucked them into the box, along with some postcards. She planned to give it all to that childish ghost.
Chen Xin watched her wrapping it up. “A gift…?”
“Why are you so nosy?” Luo Qingmeng shot back.
“I’m just curious, that’s all.” Chen Xin replied. “Mainly because last time, you only told half the story. I couldn’t figure it out. And… Qiu Shuxue hasn’t come back either.”
Luo Qingmeng looked up, fixing her with a stare. The second half of that caught her off guard—she had no idea how Chen Xin had pieced together that the three of them were connected. Had she been that obvious?
No, that couldn’t be right…
Chen Xin’s words left her in a bind—speak up, and it sounded like there was something to it. Stay silent, and it felt awkward too. It would be cleaner if there were nothing between them, but in truth, there was something illicit.
“Mind your own business.” Luo Qingmeng kept her head down and pulled a star-shaped card from the store’s giveaway stack. She glanced at Chen Xin and shot her a glare. Once Chen Xin had wandered off, she picked up a pen and wrote on it.
【Happy Birthday. May fortune fill your days.】
She added another line: 【Rejoice always, and may your days endure forever.】
As she wrote, it suddenly occurred to her that Qiu Shuxue was twenty-five, right? So last year had been her birth zodiac year. From Luo Qingmeng’s experience, those years weren’t terrible overall—just the lead-up and aftermath tended to be rough.
At noon, Luo Qingmeng stepped out for a quick browse and bought a red pendant with a little tiger charm—Qiu Shuxue’s zodiac animal.
Qiu Shuxue didn’t really seem like a tiger, though.
More like a little snake.
Luo Qingmeng was a dog by zodiac. She figured she wasn’t fierce at all, but… well, she could certainly bite when it counted.
She tucked the red cord in alongside it. For about twenty yuan, it came with a box. Luo Qingmeng didn’t have much money, but she was practical and gentle at heart, with a strong sense of ceremony. Since she’d promised, the birthday gift naturally had to be thoughtful and complete.
Though giving a gift to one’s mistress was downright strange!
Luo Qingmeng went back and forth between why she was giving her mistress a gift—whose birthday fell on March 31st—and her plan to move out in April.
To steel her resolve for April, she asked another coworker, Xiao Tang, “Your neighborhood still has rentals available, right?”
The two of them weren’t close—Luo Qingmeng didn’t care for Xiao Tang’s ways and had no intention of rooming with her. Xiao Tang nodded; it was no trouble at all to help out. She finished shelving a stack of books and said, “Yeah, I saw one yesterday. It’s the owner’s own place—you could rent direct from them and skip the subletter. Three rooms; you could find someone to share with.”
She added, “It’s like 2,200, cheap for a reason though—stairwell only, sixth floor. See if you can handle the climb. Nice place otherwise. I’ll tear off a flyer for you later.”
“Good. Thanks.”
Stairs to the sixth floor would be a workout, but she only had to do it once a day. Back in school, her dorm had been on the sixth floor too, and she’d climbed them every day.
She could handle hardship.
“Oh, and if you lock it in for April, the landlord’s parents will be gone by mid-month. First month free.”
As Xiao Tang spoke, she pulled out her phone and opened the photos she’d taken. Luo Qingmeng scrutinized the details and asked her to send the pictures. She’d only rented her current place for a single month—Li An wasn’t giving her any money, so she couldn’t afford to stay on anyway. The landlord wouldn’t let her sublet either. The catch here was that she’d need a roommate for this one.
“Why move so soon? Didn’t you just move once already?” Xiao Tang clocked out right after her shift and stayed out of the grapevine, so she probably didn’t know about Luo Qingmeng’s saga as the desperate widow next door. Luo Qingmeng just said she’d run into a creep and needed to get out fast.
“Moving back and forth is so exhausting.” Xiao Tang long-pressed the screen to send the pics, then remembered something. “Sis, we haven’t added each other on WeChat yet.”
Luo Qingmeng hummed in acknowledgment. She opened WeChat on her phone. Xiao Tang scanned the code to add her, and Luo Qingmeng tapped to accept. Below Xiao Tang’s request, she saw a new friend request with additional information.
Qiu Shuxue: [I’ll pick you up tonight—go out for grilled fish, or come to your place to make it?]
Do?
Luo Qingmeng frowned.
Luo Qingmeng replies to her: [Let’s go out for grilled fish!]
After sending it, under Xiao Tang’s gaze, she accepted Xiao Tang’s friend request. Xiao Tang couldn’t help but ask, “Who with? Which place? The new Aunt Su Fish one? Don’t go there and step on a landmine—it’s just tailored to local tastes, no flavor at all, purely fishy. Suzhou people’s tastes are surprisingly sweet, I’m done, you get me? The tofu puffs from the side dishes, I ate until I was sick of them, speechless.”
Luo Qingmeng was left dumbfounded.
She thought, “Why do I have to go eat fish with the mistress?”
Why?
/
