Chapter 55: Answer
“Hold me.”
The silver chain made Lina’s bloodless fingertips look even paler.
She was trembling. In a few breaths, the gloom in her eyes had completely dissipated, and a fragile aura poured out. Every strand of fur on her two ears was begging for her master’s favor.
Adele was stunned for a moment, unresponsive.
Lina held the chain closer and repeated, “Hold me.”
The two words “please” were already on the tip of her tongue. Only by being held by Adele could she confirm that she had not been abandoned.
Hold me.
I’m really begging you.
The moment she learned that Lina had not received the letter, Adele felt as if she had been plunged into an ice cellar, because she knew that Lina’s childhood trauma had not yet healed.
How could a person who already lacked love accept being abandoned again?
On countless nights, in their intimate moments, Lina had been streaming with tears, her choked words of love repeating “don’t leave me” the most.
Not “love me,” but “don’t leave me.”
Don’t leave me alone, don’t let me curl up in a cold corner by myself again, don’t abandon me.
Adele’s heart ached for her. Lina’s tears were still swirling in her eyes, but her own tears had already fallen.
There were too many such moments. It was no exception during lovemaking. She couldn’t bear to be too rough with the rabbit ball. If they were to play BDSM games, she would even be the first to call out the safe word.
But today, her “unannounced departure” had clearly really hurt Lina.
She didn’t know what had gone wrong, why Lina hadn’t received the letter. But she knew that her baby must be hurt.
“Lina, I really didn’t want to leave you.” Adele closed the carriage door with a backhand motion and took the initiative to move closer.
Even though she knew that an emotionally unstable person might go mad the next second.
Even though she knew that a person with immense power, if they wanted to trap her, had plenty of ways. Perhaps she would be locked in a completely soundproof room, her hands and feet shackled, and even, she would be forced…
Adele understood it all.
But the pain of being close to Lina was far less than the pain of seeing her cry.
Adele was willing.
She was willing to be “caught” and brought back by Lina.
“Is that so?”
Lina stared at her. The anger and resentment of being abandoned had disappeared without a trace the moment their eyes met.
Her gaze was filled with only grievance.
She hated the whole world, hated herself, but she would never hate Adele.
Even if Adele had really wanted to run.
She couldn’t bring herself to hate her.
Lina’s eyes were moist and red. She said stubbornly, “I don’t understand love. I’m vicious, I’m extremely greedy, I want everything. I want you to tolerate me in every way. Don’t you hate that?”
“I don’t.” Adele was resolute.
“Love is not innate. If you don’t know how to love, I’ll only feel sorry that you haven’t been loved well.”
Adele paused and said, “Baby.”
The moment these two words came out, Lina’s tears immediately rolled down.
“I’ll go home with you. Let’s go home now, okay?” Adele deliberately skipped over the chain.
How many times in the past had she politely refused? To be led like a dog was too humiliating.
“Then you hold me.” But Lina was exceptionally stubborn.
She needed a sense of belonging.
The gorgeous palace gown could cover her scarred skin, deeply hiding the gloom of the past.
But this was self-deception. She had only covered the wounds. The festering sores were still oozing pus.
Power had indeed given her a sense of security. But the moment Adele disappeared, the safe harbor built by power instantly collapsed.
Even though she was already a high-ranking official, second to one, and her fame was unparalleled, it was still not as reassuring as being Adele’s dog.
“Are you abandoning me?”
Adele hesitated for a long time, then took the chain and said, “I’m not…”
Being held in Adele’s hand, Lina immediately retracted all her sharpness. She nuzzled Adele’s arm and said, “Take me home.”
Adele knew in her heart that this was far from over. When they got home, there would probably be more trouble…
*
The afternoon sun enveloped the entire palace. Outside the French windows, the dripping sound of melting snow had been going on for a day and a night.
Spring had quietly arrived.
A faint, calming medicinal fragrance filled the room. Huaguang was leaning against the headboard. It was lunchtime, but she was not resting. She was holding a few official documents.
On the bedside table were two stacks of files. One was to be reviewed, the other had already been reviewed. On the top one, the ink was not yet dry.
The palace door was gently pushed open a crack. Yuan You’s face was beaming, her steps also much lighter than usual.
Huaguang’s gaze was still on the official documents, but her furrowed brow relaxed the moment she heard Yuan You’s footsteps.
Her voice was tinged with a hint of fatigue, but more of a wicked teasing. “You’re getting more and more unruly. You don’t even knock now?”
Yuan You was stunned.
The person before her had just ordered her not to knock when she entered last night. Now?
“Please, Your Majesty, punish me.” Yuan You thought Huaguang’s hand was itching.
Huaguang didn’t look up and said with a laugh, “Bad dog. I just rewarded you yesterday.”
Yuan You touched her burning ears and hurriedly changed the subject. “The bishop has been captured. The remaining nine elders have all been caught in one fell swoop.”
Huaguang finally moved her gaze to Yuan You’s excited face.
“These people have been brought back to the palace through a secret passage and are locked in the dungeon, waiting for your disposal at any time!”
A smile appeared on Huaguang’s lips.
It was not a pretense to maintain composure and elegance, but a real, from-the-heart smile.
Her attitude toward the Sacred Cult was the same as Lina’s—eradication. But she did not agree with the plan of a large-scale killing. The hopelessly extreme elements could be killed, but to maintain stability, she could not carry out a large-scale massacre of the people.
She had an invincible ghost army in her hands. She was not worried about public protest. But a considerable number of the people involved in the Sacred Cult were young and strong. The country needed to develop. She had to preserve the labor force. From a long-term perspective, she could not kill too many people.
She had long since realized that she and Lina would definitely have disagreements. She didn’t think Lina would openly contradict her, defy her, but it was inevitable that a rift would form. So she had to pull Adele in.
The inherently good-natured Adele would certainly not want to see her lover become a killing machine, would not want to see bloodshed and a river of blood.
So she would definitely stop Lina from killing. In this way, the main conflict would be shifted to the two of them…
Huaguang could then continue to be a monarch and a subject who were in step with Lina.
What’s more, a merit that shakes the master.
Huaguang was also naturally suspicious. She had to have a way to hold Lina, a bargaining chip.
Fortunately, she had now confirmed that Lina’s weak spot was Adele.
“Very good.” Huaguang put down the official document in her hand and beckoned to Yuan You. “Come here. Tell me the details. I want to hear…”
However, before she could finish, her movement abruptly froze. The smile that had just appeared on her face froze, and then a blatant pain appeared.
Huaguang abruptly pressed her temples, so hard that even her fingertips turned white.
“Your Majesty!” Yuan You rushed forward in one step and said urgently, “Is your headache acting up again?”
Huaguang did not answer immediately, just pressed her temples forcefully. After a long while, she let out a very light muffled grunt and said weakly, “…It’s fine. It’s an old problem anyway. I just remembered some strange memories again.”
“What memories?” Yuan You massaged her head, her movements skilled, the force just right, with an obvious cherish.
“For example, the Shadow Guard.” Huaguang said in confusion, “In my memory, you were a shadow guard, staying by my side silently. Wherever I was, you were there, like my shadow. You could even die for me.”
“Shadow Guard? I’ve heard of it from the eastern emissary… I think it should be similar to a guardian knight.” Yuan You paid attention to her fingertips and blurted out, “But I can also die for Your Majesty.”
Huaguang slapped her bottom with a backhand and warned, “Don’t talk nonsense.”
Yuan You, having been hit, secretly curved her lips. “Yes.”
“In my memory, I also became moody, bullying you every day, hitting you without a reason. You would come back from a mission, covered in wounds, and I would still punish you by making you kneel in the snow. You couldn’t bear the pain and fainted. The first thing you said when you woke up was to apologize to me.” Huaguang’s eyes were a little unfocused. “I was so bad.”
“It’s fine. As long as it’s from Your Majesty…” Yuan You wickedly moved closer to Huaguang’s ear and said audaciously, “Your subordinate will gladly accept it.”
“Is that so?” Huaguang asked.
“It is.” Yuan You, halfway through being wicked, began to confess her love deeply. “No matter if those memories are real or fake, and no matter what my identity is, knight or shadow guard, I will always stay by Your Majesty’s side, always accompany you…”
Huaguang’s eyes grew hot. After a long silence, she said, “I love you.”
Yuan You turned red from head to toe in an instant.
The fingertips on her forehead were clearly getting hot. Huaguang didn’t need to look to know that Yuan You was cooked again. She pulled her in front of her, her gaze inadvertently sliding down and settling on her neck.
The top three buttons of Yuan You’s outer garment were all undone. The collar was slightly open. The snow-white shirt inside was also only casually buttoned. As she breathed, her chest rose and fell, her skin peeking through.
A hint of understanding and playfulness flashed in Huaguang’s eyes. She said wickedly, “My Lady Yuan You, what’s with your clothes? Why aren’t they properly buttoned? This is not like your usual style. Dressed like this, coming to my palace, what are you trying to do?”
Yesterday, the quill pen had been too much fun. In the heat of the moment, she had made her swell.
Yuan You almost took out a mask from her pocket and put it on. She stammered, “Ah… this… I… maybe… uh…”
She was so embarrassed she was incoherent. Was she supposed to say that it was because the bite marks from yesterday hadn’t healed, and it was very uncomfortable for them to rub against the shirt fabric, so she had secretly loosened the buttons for relief?
How could she possibly say that…
Seeing her wish she could find a hole to crawl into, Huaguang very considerately changed the subject. “If you can’t button it, then don’t. It looks good open too. What about Lina and Adele? Are they back?”
Yuan You let out a sigh of relief as if she had been granted a pardon. “Yes. They have returned to the manor. But the informant said…”
As Yuan You spoke, her tone became a little subtle. “…said that he saw Lina being led off the carriage by Adele… on her neck, there seemed to be a… collar.”
Huaguang’s expression was surprised.
Shouldn’t it be Adele who was wearing it?
The experience of being oppressed in her childhood had given Huaguang an obsession with being the one on top. Even when she was lying down, she had to be the one in control.
When she had just gotten together with Yuan You, she had even precisely controlled Yuan You’s speed.
Lina’s growth trajectory was largely the same as hers. How had she become the opposite?
This little rabbit…
After a long moment, Huaguang sighed with deep meaning, “Playing so big?”
*
Adele was tidying her pajamas, walking out of the bathroom. As she walked, she brought a wave of warm fragrance.
She looked up at the bed, and her footsteps paused.
Lina was not wearing the pajamas made in the palace, but the ones Adele had made.
She was kneeling in the center of the large bed, her two hands clasped together, whether consciously or unconsciously. Her entire body was curled up into a small ball, her golden-yellow ears also drooping at her sides, extremely obedient.
Completely non-aggressive.
But the leather collar on her neck was too glaring.
The lop-eared rabbit’s skin had been nurtured to be very delicate. Just now on the road, there had been some pulling. At this moment, the skin around the leather was already clearly red.
If it rubbed any more, the skin would definitely break.
Adele walked over, pondered for a moment, and said, “We’re home. You should take it off. You’ll hurt yourself again in a bit.”
Lina looked up at the sound, kneeling straight, her eyes vacant, without focus, a blank slate.
After a few seconds, she seemed to have come to her senses and said softly, “Only when I’m wearing this do I feel… a little bit of security.”
As she spoke, she tilted her chin up slightly, revealing the bound neck. The red marks were even more obvious.
“You haven’t held me for a long time.” Her eyes were dependent. “Come on, hold me. Hold me and don’t let go. Let’s sleep together.”
The little rabbit was so insecure. Adele’s chest felt as if it had been hit, a dull ache.
She didn’t dare to go against Lina now. A forceful refusal would only provoke a more intense reaction.
Adele sighed quietly in her heart. A thought emerged:
I’ll just go along with her for now. When she’s fast asleep, I’ll secretly untie it.
“Okay.” Adele climbed onto the bed, gently pulled the chain, and carefully pulled the person into her arms. “Let’s sleep.”
Lina seemed to be finally satisfied. She was being held. Like a little puppy who had gotten its master’s permission, she immediately snuggled into Adele’s embrace.
She hugged one of Adele’s arms tightly, her cheek nuzzling her arm. She had finally found the home she wanted.
“Will you always love me?” Lina’s voice was very soft, an obedient and careful probe.
Adele’s heart raced. That obedience wasn’t pure, because she heard Lina subconsciously clench her teeth to hold herself back. Beneath that calm emotion, there was probably a turbulent, extreme undercurrent.
“I will,” Adele said. “I will always love you.”
She had to, just like calling Lina ‘baby,’ express her feelings to her countless times.
Until Lina was no longer apprehensive.
Neither of them spoke anymore. They closed their eyes, as if they had fallen asleep together.
All of Adele’s attention was focused on the breathing of the person beside her. She pricked up her ears, carefully distinguishing Lina’s movements.
After a long time, so long that her arm had gone numb from being pressed, so long that it was past midnight, so long that even the moon was starting to get sleepy.
Lina’s breathing finally became even.
The force of the arm around her loosened slightly. Adele thought, Lina must be asleep.
She waited patiently for a while longer, confirming that the rhythm of her breathing was steady and correct, before she cautiously opened her eyes.
Adele very slowly pulled out her numb arm.
Lina grumbled but did not open her eyes.
Adele’s heart was pounding like a drum, like a thief.
She propped herself up, gently brushed Lina’s hair aside, and reached for the nape of the rabbit ball’s neck. Just as her fingertips were about to touch the leather—
Lina’s eyes snapped open.
There was not a trace of sleepiness in her gaze, clear and cold.
She looked straight into Adele’s eyes and said coldly, “What are you doing?”
“Ah!” Adele let out a short, startled cry. Her body instinctively shrank back, her hand recoiling as if burned.
She instantly lost her balance and fell back onto the bed in a pathetic heap. The huge panic of being caught on the spot made her mind shut down.
Lina did not speak immediately. She got on top of her, her knees spread apart, pressing on either side of Adele’s body, completely trapping her in her shadow.
Lina looked down at Adele, her face no longer showing a trace of obedience or softness. Her blue eyes held only a bone-chilling cold.
She gently traced Adele’s cheek with her fingertips, taking in all of the person’s panic and discomposure. Her voice gradually grew deeper, every word wrapped in a dangerous aura.
“After you fall asleep, your breathing rate is 15 times per minute. From the moment you got on the bed until now, you haven’t been asleep at all. From beginning to end, you’ve been waiting for me to sleep, right…”
“Answer me!”
