I’ll Butcher Pigs to Support You! 90

Chapter 90: My 100% Blackened, Broken Wife [2]

Sensing her wife’s silence, Song Yugui almost jumped up. She quickly got up and awkwardly made up a lie. “I… I just wanted to warm you up. You’re so cold. I’m afraid you won’t be able to warm up on your own.”

But after a short while, Shen Xizhi had already composed herself. She knew that she wanted to live, no matter what, she had to live. She had originally planned to exchange her body, hadn’t she? Then what difference did it make if it was a man or a woman?

It was just that in her heart, she particularly loathed it.

A pale smile appeared on the woman’s face. She didn’t know how used she was to living a life of pretense. This smile actually seemed sincere.

Song Yugui was silent, looking at her in silence, and heard her say, “It’s alright. As long as the young lady likes it, I’m willing. For the young lady to save me is truly a great kindness…”

A feeling of pity uncontrollably began to spread.

“It’s alright. You can also say it if you don’t like it. You don’t have to be so restrained with me.”

Although she knew that she couldn’t make Xizhi let down her guard all at once, she still couldn’t help but say these words, hoping that Xizhi could… lower her guard against her a little, just a little bit was fine.

Sure enough, Shen Xizhi’s smile was flawless, but she didn’t say anything, just quietly, with picturesque features, looking at her.

So beautiful. My wife is so beautiful. That dead male lead has no taste. Hmph, I’ll dote on my wife.

Song Yugui couldn’t help but reach out, wanting to touch her wife’s face. This was something she was used to touching before.

But this time, her wife looked up at her with a pair of cool, doe-like eyes, as if she were someone to be very wary of. That hand paused in mid-air, unable to go any further.

Shen Xizhi belatedly realized, her small face turning pale, afraid that she would be angry. She then brought her own face closer, little by little, using the little strength she had in her body, and pressed it against her palm, then smiled at her gently, doing her best to please.

She was afraid that if she displeased her, she would be chased out. On such a cold day, she would die outside.

Song Yugui felt even more sorry for her and was about to cry again. She had already lived a lifetime and should be very strong, but seeing her wife so cautious, so broken, her heart ached so much.

The wife I held in my palm and doted on, has suffered so much here. If I had known, I would have died earlier, so I could have come over earlier to dote on my wife.

Song Yugui followed her heart and rubbed Xizhi’s smooth cheek, saying warmly, “You can lie down for a while. I’ll go and cook you a bowl of noodles to line your stomach. You definitely haven’t eaten…”

The more she thought, the more her heart ached. My wife, besides fooling around with me in bed and forgetting the time, when has she ever gone hungry? Damn it! My poor wife.

Shen Xizhi had been driven out of Songjia Village early in the morning and had indeed not eaten all day. But she hadn’t expected this woman to cook for her.

She had thought that coming here was just to live a miserable life. She had said she would raise her, but she must have also heard of her reputation and would not like her very much, and would even be on guard against her. It was already good enough to be given a mouthful of food on a daily basis. How could she… specially cook for her?

Shen Xizhi’s expression was dazed, but her face, which was pressed against her hand, did not move at all.

It wasn’t until the other had withdrawn her hand and had pressed her into the quilt.

“You can rest for a while.”

She got out of bed and saw her curled up alone in the soft quilt, a small ball. Song Yugui felt that it would inevitably be a little boring, so she turned around and picked up Xiaobao, who was entertaining herself on the small bed, and bundled her up and stuffed her into Xizhi’s quilt, her expression at ease. “If you’re bored, you can play with her.”

Shen Xizhi was dazed. She lowered her head and only then did she realize that there was actually a child in her arms.

The child was wrapped in a quilt, pale and tender, and had been raised very well. Her pair of grape-like eyes were darting around. She’s actually at ease leaving the child with me? Shen Xizhi was surprised. “You… you know who I am?”

Could it be that she doesn’t recognize me at all and just randomly picked me up?

But the next moment, the other looked at her with a bit of confusion. “You’re Xizhi, aren’t you? What’s wrong?”

Shen Xizhi was silent. She knows me and even calls me so intimately. She must know what I’ve done. In that case, how can she still dare to leave the child with me? Is she not afraid that I’ll hurt her?

Song Yugui was just about to go to the kitchen when she suddenly remembered something halfway there, turned around, and quickly explained, “This is not my child. She’s my younger sister. But my parents have passed away, so I’m raising her now.”

She’s my younger sister.

Xiaobao was grinning at Shen Xizhi, without a single tooth on top, looking pink and tender and very cute, and she didn’t seem to be shy with strangers.

Even if Shen Xizhi’s heart was as cold as iron, she couldn’t possibly lay a hand on a small baby, so she just silently held the child in her arms.

Seeing this, Song Yugui went to cook the noodles. She couldn’t cook very difficult dishes, but she could cook noodles. This was something she had specially learned when she was bored.

When she was cooking, she also fried an egg for each of them. She hadn’t had dinner either.

When the water touched the oiled protein, the soup base was a thick, milky white. When it was time to add the noodles, a faint yellow-orange color floated on the surface of the soup, which was very appetizing.

Song Yugui served the noodle soup, and most of the shredded meat went into one bowl. Then she went to ask Shen Xizhi if she could get up.

Shen Xizhi had long since smelled the fragrance of the food. She was so hungry she could barely stand it, her eyes constantly looking out.

Receiving a gentle inquiry, as if she were a little impatient, she immediately nodded. But after she reacted, she was a little anxious, her voice gentle and reserved. “I’ll just have a little.”

I won’t waste too much of your family’s food. Let me stay. I’ll serve you well.

Although she hadn’t said these thoughts out loud, that was undoubtedly what she meant.

Song Yugui’s heart ached. She could only say in an even gentler voice, “It’s alright. You can have a little more. I’m a butcher. I’m very rich.”

She’s very rich.

Only then did Shen Xizhi have the time to glance at this room. It was countless times better than her small, dilapidated hut that couldn’t even shelter her from the rain and wind. It was the most expensive green-brick house in the countryside.

She was a little surprised. A family with such a fortune, how could they have taken a liking to her? How could they have thought of picking her up and bringing her home?

“Can you get up? There are no clothes for you at home. I’ll take you to town tomorrow to buy a set. You can wear mine for today.”

She took out a few fluffy, good-quality outer garments from the wardrobe, thinking, The original owner was quite good to herself. Every piece of clothing was bought with good fabric and was not cheap. No wonder she was still a butcher and only had a little over five taels of silver at home.

“You can put them on first.”

When she brought the clothes over, Shen Xizhi was stunned. She couldn’t quite believe that these clothes were for her. She had never touched such thick clothes before.

Even when she had been at her own home before, Shen Yaozu couldn’t even wear such good clothes.

Her heart immediately had a new concept of her being very rich.

This should be the wealthiest family she had ever come into contact with besides Chi Xiangyue. And she was also interested in her. If she could seize this opportunity well… she would be able to survive, and she could also live a stable life.

As long as life was a little more peaceful and she was bullied a little less, she would already feel very happy.

Shen Xizhi cautiously took the clothes, held them to her chest, and looked at Song Yugui with a hint of allure in her eyes.

Having been with her for decades, Song Yugui clearly knew that she was probably seducing her.

So tempting, so nice. I really want to kiss her. I haven’t kissed my wife in so many days. Aiya, how sad. Oh, that’s not right. I stole a kiss this afternoon, but that doesn’t count. I didn’t even get to her mouth.

“Do you know how to wear them? I’ll help you.”

Seeing her not moving for a long time, Song Yugui couldn’t help but go closer and say.

Shen Xizhi had a plan in her heart, her expression shy and timid as she nodded slightly, tacitly agreeing.

She just fiddled with the woman’s limbs and put her in the clothes.

Her body instantly warmed up. She had never worn such thick and comfortable clothes before.

Then she heard the woman say, “Come down and eat.”

Shen Xizhi pressed her lips together, deciding to listen to her as much as possible in the future, to never resist her, and to have to make her happy.

She walked to the table and saw two bowls of noodles on it. One bowl was full of ingredients, with an egg, meat, and green vegetables. The other bowl, although not as full as that one, was still quite full, with a fried egg and a handful of small green vegetables.

Is… is this for me to eat?

Shen Xizhi was bewildered, hesitating whether to sit down.

Song Yugui had been following her all along, because this way she could secretly look at her wife.

Seeing her standing at the table without moving, she couldn’t help but say, “Sit down. Why are you standing?”

Shen Xizhi was about to subconsciously sit down in front of the bowl without meat when she was quickly called out to. “Aiya, wait.”

Her eyes widened slightly, and her already broken heart fell to the bottom of the valley in great disappointment. Sure enough, such good things, how can I be worthy of eating them?

This world’s Shen Xizhi was not that fragile and prone to crying. She endured it and didn’t show a single bit of it. She lowered her head, revealing her snowy white neck, her expression gentle and submissive. She thought, She called me over for dinner. She’ll give me some food, right? Just a little is fine. Those sweet words, I don’t have to take them to heart.

She comforted herself like this.

But Song Yugui just walked over and pressed her down in front of the other bowl of noodles. When she saw the bowl full of ingredients and the fragrant hand-pulled noodles, she was so flustered she was about to get up, but the hand behind her was a little strong, and she was pressed down so hard she couldn’t move. “You can have this bowl. I’ll have that one. You’re so thin. You should eat more meat to replenish your strength.”

Her voice was gentle, as if she were doting on her.

Shen Xizhi was stunned, her mind a blank. She could never have imagined that this bowl of noodles, covered in meat, was actually for her.

She didn’t even know how long it had been since she had seen meat. For a moment, she didn’t even dare to pick up her chopsticks.

Song Yugui was puzzled. “Why aren’t you eating? Do you want me to feed you?”

Only then did she barely come to her senses.

She quickly turned her head away. “N-no need. You… why aren’t you eating?”

The meat was almost all in this bowl.

She didn’t say it clearly, but Song Yugui understood. “I’ll eat tomorrow. I’m not eating today. Look how thin you are. Hurry up and eat. You can rest after you’re done. Today… I came too late.”

Shen Xizhi’s lashes trembled slightly. She was very clear about what had happened today. Perhaps she had been watching her for a long time. But why… had she never felt it?

“Hurry up and eat.”

Seeing her not moving, Song Yugui urged her again.

Only then did Shen Xizhi frantically pick up her chopsticks and take a mouthful of noodles. Her hands were trembling, but she ate very, very quickly, stuffing large mouthfuls into her mouth, as if she were afraid she wouldn’t be able to eat in a little while.

Song Yugui knew she had been hungry for a long time and couldn’t bear to stop her, so she could only comfort her from the side. “You can eat slower. It’s all yours. It’s not good for digestion if you eat too fast. Don’t be anxious.”

The young woman ate several mouthfuls fiercely, her cheeks puffed out, and her speed finally slowed down. She specialized in picking out the meat, which showed how much she wanted to eat meat.

Song Yugui was still coaxing and persuading her. “Slower, eat slower. There’s plenty of meat. We’ll have meat at home again tomorrow. Don’t be anxious.”

Our home…

What a novel word. She had never heard it before.

Can I still eat meat tomorrow? With her, there’s so much meat to eat. But I really hate lesbians. Lesbians are always so pretentious. Lesbians might be good when they’re good, but when they’re bad, they’re worse than anyone. I’ve never met a good lesbian, but I’ve met a bad one, a very bad one.

Shen Xizhi’s heart did not waver in the slightest. She lowered her head and quietly ate her noodles. At first, she had eaten very quickly, but now she was not so anxious anymore. A beautiful woman eating noodles was also a pleasing sight. It was just that these clothes were a little unsuitable for her. Her figure was frail, and they were too loose on her. She had to roll up the cuffs to see her fingers. She was a little shorter than in her previous life. The original, vicious Song Yugui had not raised her well.

The more Song Yugui thought about it, the more her heart ached. She really wanted to touch her wife’s face, but she also knew that she was afraid of her now.

In the end, she didn’t reach out and just lowered her head to eat her own noodles.

The noodles were hand-pulled by her, the noodles were chewy, and the soup was fresh and delicious. It was really delicious.

It was also possible that she hadn’t eaten anything today either, so it felt delicious when she ate it.

After finishing a bowl of noodles with a slurp, it was just enough to line her stomach. On the other side, Shen Xizhi already had a difficult expression on her face, her brow furrowed tightly, but she was still very seriously stuffing noodles into her mouth.

Based on Song Yugui’s understanding of her, she was probably full but was reluctant to waste it, or she was afraid that she wouldn’t be able to eat such good things tomorrow and was forcing herself to eat.

So she snatched the other’s chopsticks and said warmly, “If you can’t finish it, then don’t eat it. We can eat it again tomorrow, hmm?”

Her words were exceptionally gentle, making one want to drown in them.

But Shen Xizhi had at least experienced a lot of human ugliness and managed to hold on at this time.

She touched her slightly bulging stomach. She had eaten her fill today, and it had been a long time since she had eaten so much. She was even a little full.

Uncomfortable, but also very comfortable.

Shen Xizhi nodded, her eyes lowered as she looked at the empty table in front of her. The next moment, a slurping sound came from her ear. She subconsciously looked over and saw the other holding the noodles she hadn’t finished and eating them.

How could this kind of thing happen to her… she had already eaten from it.

She actually didn’t mind.

Others loathed her for being ruthless and even said she liked to seduce men and was unclean. They wouldn’t even want the things she had touched. She had already lived to the point where everyone looked down on her, but now, this person was willing to eat her leftovers.

Even if it was more likely that she didn’t want to waste it, her heart still couldn’t help but beat faster.

But she hated lesbians.

If this person weren’t a lesbian, it would be fine.

After they finished their noodles, the empty room was so quiet it was scary. The woman was tidying up the bowls and chopsticks. This should have been her job, but the other had snatched them from her without a word and had even told her to sit down and not move.

Shen Xizhi was now completely dependent on this person to survive and didn’t dare to disobey her in the slightest.

She sat on the chair in silence, quiet and obedient, not moving.

It wasn’t until a baby’s wail came from the room that she was startled, her dark eyes looking back in a fluster.

She both felt that she should go and coax the child, lest she get angry, and was also afraid that if she went to coax the child, she would be angry that she was disobedient and had moved around casually.

So she was extremely anxious where she stood. The child kept crying. If she was unhappy, she could also use this to vent her anger on her. The young woman’s brow furrowed tightly with annoyance.

What should I do?

Fortunately, Song Yugui heard the crying and came in. Seeing Shen Xizhi standing there with a helpless expression, not moving at all, she almost burst out laughing. She managed to hold it in, quickly walked over, and picked up the child who was crying so hard from being ignored for a long time from the quilt, stuffing her into Shen Xizhi’s arms and asking softly, “I haven’t finished washing yet. Can you help me with Xiaobao for a little while?”

Shen Xizhi looked at her and nodded timidly.

She knew that many people liked this frail and weak act.

But she wasn’t sure if this person liked it.

Seeing her like this, Song Yugui’s heart softened again and again. Even though she hadn’t fallen in love with her yet and was still afraid of her, she still couldn’t help but reach out and touch her head, rubbing it again.

“So good. I’ll reward you with a kiss in a little while.”

When she was happy, she couldn’t help but habitually say these things to her wife.

Shen Xizhi: …

This… is this also considered a reward?

Seeing the other lower her head and not speak, she finally realized how speechless her words had been. She was so angry she bit her tongue. You’re going to die! My wife is still afraid of you, and you’re saying such frivolous things to her! What’s the difference between that and a libertine!

Song Yugui didn’t dare to stay by her wife’s side any longer and took a deep breath.

“I’m going to wash the dishes. You can coax her. If you can’t, then just let her cry.”

I feel like a child crying for a little longer probably won’t die. And besides, we didn’t provoke her. Why is she crying so hard?

Song Yugui hugged herself in fear.

Shen Xizhi replied in a low voice. She then went out to wash the dishes, thinking as she washed about how to sleep with Xizhi at night. Separate beds or together? If we sleep together, Xizhi will definitely be very scared. But separate beds… damn it! I’m not separating, I’m not separating! Why should we separate beds? My wife and I have been sleeping together for decades! It’s impossible to separate rooms, absolutely impossible!

After Song Yugui had finished washing the dishes, she still decided that the two of them had to sleep together. Otherwise, when would Xizhi ever fall in love with her?

When Song Yugui entered the room, Shen Xizhi was gently teasing the child with her fingers. The moment she saw her come in, she quickly pulled her hand back, her expression nervous and anxious. The villagers disliked her for being dirty…

“Mmm? What’s wrong? You look like you’ve just been caught stealing.”

Song Yugui walked over with a smile. Seeing that the child was no longer crying, she waved her small fist at them. “You’re still the one who knows how to coax a child. I have no way with children. I don’t even know how to coax them when they cry.”

“Children are very easy to coax.”

She said softly, her side profile against the candlelight, strikingly pale.

Song Yugui took a deep breath and looked down at the very energetic Xiaobao. Seeing her wave her fists at them again, she was silent for a while and couldn’t help but ask, “When can she fall asleep?”

Shen Xizhi shook her head. “I don’t know either. Children sleep a lot. They should be able to fall asleep soon.”

Alright then.

Song Yugui touched the child’s face and said again, “I’ll go and boil some hot water. You can wash up, okay?”

Washing with hot water…

The young woman nodded in silence. She was a frail woman living alone. She had to worry about her own meals every day and couldn’t even gather a few bundles of firewood. How could she bear to boil hot water? She had always just wiped herself with cold water.

By the time Song Yugui had finished boiling the hot water and returned, Shen Xizhi was already sitting on the edge of the bed, holding her clothes, which she had taken off, in her arms, her eyes staring blankly at a spot, out of focus.

She walked up and waved her hand. The young woman looked up blankly and saw her frowning. Her heart skipped a beat, and she quickly said, “The child… I’ve already coaxed the child to sleep.”

She pressed her lips together and looked at the quiet Xiaobao lying on the side, thinking that the other was blaming her for being lazy.

Song Yugui shook her head. “No, that’s not what I’m asking you. I’m trying to say, why did you take off your clothes? Aren’t you cold?”

Shen Xizhi was stunned. The hand holding her clothes tightened, her voice as faint as a mosquito’s buzz. “I… I was afraid of getting them dirty.”

Her clothes had been soaked by the wind and snow outside. When she had woken up, she hadn’t expected to be fully dressed, just lying on someone else’s bed. She had also been commanded by her to wear her clothes. Just now, she had remembered in a hurry and had quickly taken off the clothes, afraid of getting them dirty and making her unhappy.

My wife is so cautious.

Besides the heartache, Song Yugui’s voice became even more gentle, so gentle it could have dripped water. “What are you afraid of? Don’t be afraid. It’s alright if it’s dirty. I’ll pay someone to wash it. It won’t be hard on you.”

She had originally meant to say that she didn’t want her to live such a hard life, but she hadn’t expected to arouse the other’s vigilance. She just heard a light, frail voice from that side say, “I can also wash them. There’s no need to hire someone else. You’re so good to me. I should do something for you.”

These words were insincere, but in order to please her, she could only say so.

She just hoped that this woman was easy to coax and not like that Song Xingchuan, who had agreed with her on the surface but had done other things in private.

Trying to have it both ways, it’s really disgusting.

“You don’t have to do anything. If you really want to, you can let me kiss… no, you can just help me cook in the future. You’ve also seen that there’s only me and a milk-fed baby at home. I’m also quite rough, so I can’t take good care of the house.”

She also didn’t want to let Xizhi do nothing. With Xizhi’s personality, she would definitely be anxious again. It was better to find something for her to do, to make her feel a little more valuable.

Even though this person had changed her words very quickly, Shen Xizhi still heard what she had wanted to say at first.

The woman lowered her eyes, hiding the deep color in them, thinking, This is a lesbian, lecherous and horny.

“I can also wash the clothes. I can do anything.”

As long as I can stay, I can do anything.

“No need. It’s so cold in winter. Why bother? You can just stay at home and wait for me to bring you food every day. If you want to go to town with me for a walk, that’s also fine, but you have to bring that milk-fed baby.”

Otherwise, if the child is left alone in the village, she might really be taken away by some bastard.

Shen Xizhi didn’t want to go to town. Her reputation was ruined. Every time she was in a crowded place, she always felt that they were looking at her with a strange gaze.

She had clearly not done anything at first, yet it was as if she had already been wrong. If she was wrong, she couldn’t help but go along with the mistake.

So she didn’t like to go to places with people.

But she couldn’t say this to this person.

So Shen Xizhi just nodded, agreeing on the surface, and then said, “You… since there’s no one in your house, I’ll stay and help you clean up.”

Zhizhi looks so good even after she’s blackened.

The two of them had both rolled in the snow and were not very clean. After they had each taken a bath, they lay down on the bed together. Shen Xizhi had washed first. She had told her to wash early to warm the bed, and she had obediently gone.

Song Yugui washed later. When she returned, Xizhi was lying obediently on the bed.

They clearly slept in the same bed every night, but now she was a little anxious, gripping the corner of her inner garment tightly. After a moment, it was Shen Xizhi who turned her head first and said softly with her head bowed, “Aren’t you coming up?”

It was unclear if it was a mistake, but that voice seemed to carry a hint of seduction…

Song Yugui suddenly straightened her back and obediently got on the bed. But she hadn’t expected that the moment she got on, a frail, soft body would wrap around her, her arms holding her waist. That little bit of displeasure had all dissipated when she had looked up, and she seemed very natural, as if she were willing.

Song Yugui was also used to it. She reached out and held the woman’s slender waist.

Her waist was even thinner than in her previous life. Her heart ached.

Seeing her actions as she had expected, Shen Xizhi couldn’t tell if she was relieved or what in her heart.

A lecherous person is the easiest to satisfy. In the past, she had still cared about her face, her dignity, and had been unwilling to easily give herself away. There was also the reason that she really couldn’t accept Song Xingchuan. But now, after experiencing a near-death experience, she couldn’t care about anything anymore. She just wanted to live, to live well. What was dignity? She had long since lost it.

Just as Song Yugui was about to hold her and lie down, Shen Xizhi suddenly spoke, a seductive smile on her face. “Didn’t you say you were going to reward me?”

The reward was a kiss. Song Yugui remembered, but she hadn’t expected her to also remember and to have even said it. Her palms immediately started to sweat with nervousness. Wait, is she willingly giving me a kiss?

She lowered her eyes to look at Xizhi but couldn’t see any flaws on her face, as if she were sincerely willing to be kissed by her.

Little liar, your lying skills are getting more and more proficient. But this can’t be blamed on her. It’s all the fault of that group of people who bullied her. My poor Zhizhi.

Song Yugui sighed deeply in her heart, held Shen Xizhi’s round head, and then, with great preciousness, placed a kiss on her forehead. “Alright, let’s go to sleep.”

Shen Xizhi was a little dazed. Is this a kiss? Why does it feel so strange?

She was held in her arms and didn’t speak in silence.

Such an intimate embrace was something she had never had before. She had even thought… she would be sleeping on the floor, with no chance to sleep on the bed.

Song Yugui held her slender waist and suddenly remembered that she hadn’t introduced herself yet. The Xizhi in front of her didn’t know her.

Therefore, she held her and said with a bit of seriousness, “By the way, my name is Song… no, my name is Li Shuhe. I’m a butcher from Lijia Village. My parents passed away a while back. Now there’s just me and Xiaobao at home. Oh, after today, there will be you too. You can call me… Shuhe in the future.”

She had originally wanted to say ‘wife’, but she was still too concerned about her face and quickly changed her words.

Only then did Shen Xizhi know her name.

Li Shuhe…

She recited it in her heart and again felt that she had no impression.

They had never met, yet she had brought her home when she was on the verge of death. What was she after? Just this appearance and body?