287: Something Heavier than All of Humanity
The Parlor.
A simple name for a common space, along with the dining room and the bath.
It was a relaxing space, with low tables, sofas, and chairs, a fireplace, and a window overlooking the garden.
I thought the furniture’s value had probably dropped a bit, due to the kittens’ claw marks, but since I had no plans to sell it, it wasn’t a problem. I’d heard it could be repaired, but the new scratches still held memories, so I was hesitant to have them fixed.
A wagon was now in the room.
I had prepared some snacks, in anticipation of the end of the ‘negotiations’—Liz’s cookies and a pot of milk. They were all cold, partly because it was summer, even in the cool climate of Listrea, and partly because I had thought I would be too exhausted after the negotiations to even bother with making tea.
While I wasn’t that exhausted, I was mentally drained. A fruitless conversation with an unreasonable opponent was tiring.
“…Was that… alright?” I muttered.
“Alright, in what way?”
Liz deftly poured milk into each cup and placed them in front of us, along with a plate of cookies. Samarkand had declined, whether out of consideration for me or Harken, I didn’t know, so there were three servings. And as she did, the plate clattered, a rare occurrence for the usually graceful Liz.
“…The future where we make peace with the humans… did I just crush it?”
The terms presented in today’s ‘negotiation,’ including the personal ones, were all unacceptable.
And yet, the fact that the other side had even mentioned the word ‘negotiation’ was a huge step forward. If we were to continue to negotiate patiently… perhaps.
“I think we should have just killed him.” Liz said, her voice filled with a dangerous edge.
“…Liz?”
“Is that an envoy? Is that a negotiation? …Is that?!” Liz was clearly irritated.
In truth, it had been a negotiation in name only. I had thought it was just a way to buy time, or to probe for information… I even thought that their hope had been to provoke us into tearing the envoy to shreds.
“And on top of that, to say that you started this war, Master? How dare… how dare they…”
She sat down on the sofa with a rough movement that made the springs creak, stuffed a cookie into her mouth, and crunched on it. But even that didn’t seem to be enough to quell her anger, and she breathed heavily, like a wounded tiger.
Her angry face, which I rarely saw, was cute, and the thought that she was angry for my sake made my heart skip a beat.
“There, there, Liz. Have some milk.”
“Master, why are you so calm? To be told such things by a bunch of fools who don’t understand anything…”
“Well, I just screamed. And when they said that, you all got angry for me, right? I thought it would be a bad balance if I got angry, too.”
“Is that the issue?”
“Yes. And besides, that kind of thing doesn’t even make me angry.”
“…Master, have you always been so… mature?”
“Because I no longer expect anything from humans.”
Liz was speechless. Rebecca sighed.
“Well… that’s probably for the best. At first, I felt sorry for the messenger, who didn’t even know the contents of the letter, but in terms of being in a fantasy world, he’s no different. And since he seems to be dreaming a strange dream, it’s no wonder he lost in the political struggle.”
“Rebecca, you think… those terms were stupid, too?”
“They were.” Rebecca nodded lightly.
“…I can understand why they would want to play the victim. We are both victims and perpetrators. We can’t even talk to each other until we’ve reached the end.”
Rebecca drained her cup of milk in one gulp. She was a good drinker.
“And then… can we talk?”
“I doubt it. …Nothing will change. Nothing will disappear. What has been lost. The blood that has been shed. …What has been taken.”
A strong light glinted in her red eyes. An anger… and a hatred… even more intense than Liz’s.
Crack, the handle of the ceramic mug shattered. The mug, pulled by gravity, fell and shattered at Rebecca’s feet. Fortunately, it had been empty.
“Ah… I’m sorry.”
“Rebecca-sama, I will…” Samarkand, who had been standing by, quickly approached and began to clean up the shards. He, who was so skilled at fine mana control, was also in charge of cleaning the mansion, along with Liz.
…To use a greater demon as a vacuum cleaner… even if the firepower of a powerful mage like a demon was excessive in peacetime, I wondered if this was alright. But since he himself would ask for work whenever there was an opportunity, in a way that went beyond black and into the abyss, I had been gradually increasing his (unsuitable for his abilities) work, with the absolute condition that he take regular breaks.
“But Rebecca, you’re saying some pretty extreme things.”
“What do you think I am? …The third princess of the elf kingdom, on her deathbed, wished. That even if the country were to fall, a future where as many elves as possible would survive—and that wish was not granted, and everything was lost, and so ‘I’ was born. I chose revenge, and I used the mindless undead, one after another, and I destroyed a city-state that had chosen to oppose me. …That is me. The Living Dead Princess, the Walking Army, ‘Rebecca Stagnet.’”
Her past, told in a flat, emotionless tone. I had heard fragments, and I had guessed, but this was the first time I had heard it in full.
“Even though I knew that it would not bring anyone joy, that nothing would come back, I still did it. …I am a bloodthirsty avenger.” Rebecca muttered, her eyes dark, her voice filled with self-deprecation.
“What’s wrong with that?”
“Huh?”
“…To kill someone… is still a bad thing, I think. But it’s no longer a matter of good or bad. …Right or wrong. It’s no longer a stage where we can use that kind of logic.”
What was needed was…
“What kind of a future do you want? What kind of people do you want to live? …That’s all, right?”
“That’s all?”
“Yes.” I nodded.
“That’s all.”
If possible, a world where no one died. A world where there was no reason for anyone to die. This world was not that. Probably, no world was.
How much you could tolerate… depended on the person. There were probably people who would say that the reason and the dignity of a person were more important. People who would say that it was better to be killed than to kill.
I was not one of them.
“…Master, it’s a little late to be asking this… but…” Liz looked at me.
“Isn’t it… painful?”
I placed a hand on my chin and thought.
“Logic and emotion are two different things. I decided on it myself, and I’ve come to terms with it, so if you say it’s painful, it’s painful, and if you say it’s not, it’s not…”
“What kind of a vague answer is that?”
“Alright. Then I’ll be less vague. Liz, come here.”
“Huh? Will I understand if I go?”
“Yes.”
I took Liz, who had come closer, and gently turned her around. Then I stood up and hugged her from behind, and sat back down.
“…Um?”
I was now in a position where Liz was on my lap, and our eyes met, her gaze a little higher than mine. Feeling her weight, I smiled.
“I’ve decided that you all are heavier. —Than all of humanity.”
That was probably an arrogant way of looking at it. There were kind people who didn’t have to draw a line in the world. But in this world, a line had already been drawn. The world was divided into humans and demons. And to erase that line… was probably impossible. And even if it were possible, it would take a long time, and I couldn’t even imagine how long that journey would be.
So, I would make that line meaningless. I would destroy everything on the other side. Because everything precious to me was on this side. Of all the precious people I had met in this world, not a single one was human.
“…I’m honored, but why am I on your lap?”
“Liz, don’t underestimate me.” My tone was composed.
“I am not so incompetent as to miss an opportunity for skinship with my lover.”
“Even if you’re not incompetent, I think you’re an idiot.” Liz cut me down.
“I’m honored.”
“That wasn’t a compliment.”
For now, I squeezed the arm I had wrapped around her waist. And I rested my cheek on her back.
“…To have someone who can do this for me… it would be a sin to say it’s still painful.”
Liz wriggled free, and I thought she was going to stand up, but she knelt on the sofa and took both of my hands, and we looked at each other.
“It’s okay to say it’s painful when it’s painful. That’s a different matter.”
“…Really? Well, I’m fine, probably.”
“Coming from a master who is the type to bottle things up and then explode, I can’t trust you.”
“I haven’t been bottling things up lately.”
“Really?”
“Because you told me to talk to you. So, I have a question. What should I do when my lover is so cute my heart hurts?”
“That is outside my job description.” Well, that was within the range of my expectations.
But to hear her say that was also fun, so there was no problem—
“…It’s… first aid.”
Liz lightly pressed her lips to my cheek and kissed me with a soft sound.
“…Liz?”
I slowly reached for the spot she had kissed, but I was afraid the sensation would disappear if I touched it, and my hand stopped. My face was probably red, and my brain had stopped working. I had done more amazing things, but a surprise attack on a place where I hadn’t been prepared had a destructive power that was too high, and my ability to think had died.
“I can’t do anything about that symptom. But to hear you say such a foolish thing… I don’t know if I should be happy, but I am.”
At her continued words, my ability to speak also died, and I fell silent, my face, which I knew was red.
Rebecca picked up a cookie and nibbled on it. And she nodded, as if it were nothing.
“I’m glad you two are getting along.”
“My master and Liz-sama are a perfect match.”
“Indeed. To be able to see the two of them so happy is the greatest reward.”
Rebecca, Samarkand, and Harken all summed it up in their own way. The three of them, together, had the same gentle eyes as they had had during the spoiling period, like Buddhas or saints.
