Chapter 13
It felt as if something had exploded with a buzz inside Zheng Xuening’s head.
For some reason, the more pitifully the little girl before her cried, the more… an inexplicable fire ignited within her heart.
And yet, her body instinctively wanted to move closer to coax her, as if this wooden doll’s body had developed a will of its own.
“When did I bully you?” Zheng Xuening was at a loss, cornered by her crying.
Lu Dieqing, however, no longer held her and spoke as she had before. She just lowered her head, curled into a ball on the bed, and buried her small head in her knees. She didn’t even look at Zheng Xuening, not answering her question.
Before, Zheng Xuening had been unaccustomed to Lu Dieqing’s affectionate behavior, as if she were some rare treasure being carefully preserved. But she discovered that what she was even more unaccustomed to was the sight of this girl lowering her head and ignoring her.
Just a moment ago, the little girl had been coaxing her, calling her the cutest little doll, her treasure. Now, she had cast her aside like a worn-out shoe and even slapped her with the label of a bully.
When had she ever bullied her?
Zheng Xuening genuinely couldn’t understand.
If she wanted to bully someone, she had a thousand ways to torment them. She hadn’t even done anything to this girl.
A little helpless, a little exasperated, but it seemed she could do nothing about her. The little girl was already crying so pitifully when she had done nothing. If she were to actually do something…
Zheng Xuening stared at Lu Dieqing’s curled-up form and heard a sigh in her own heart.
She wasn’t so depraved as to do something to a girl as weak as this.
Lu Dieqing didn’t know about the turmoil in her little doll’s heart. She just felt sad.
She had longed for a little doll, hoping that there would be a soul in this world that belonged completely to her, one that would be good to her, accompany her, and protect her. But the moment the little doll spoke to her, all those past fantasies and expectations had suddenly shattered.
Her little doll didn’t seem to like her, and was even fierce to her…
As a hostage in the Chaoying Kingdom, the first thing Lu Dieqing had learned was how to read people’s expressions while living under another’s roof. She was sensitive to people’s emotions, so of course, she could sense that the little doll she had longed for, who had just arrived in this world, was even a little impatient with her.
The thought of this broke Lu Dieqing’s heart.
She had no strength to move at all; she just wanted to hide herself away completely.
If it were just because her preparations weren’t perfect and the wooden doll hadn’t been successfully awakened, she would have had the motivation and courage to try a second time, to save up silver for better materials and make a new doll, even if everyone laughed at her.
—But the doll that had been successfully awakened didn’t like her.
Lu Dieqing’s world felt as if a mountain had suddenly crashed down upon an already precarious little boat.
She simply broke.
The devastated Little Princess curled herself into a ball. After a while, feeling cold, she quietly reached out an arm, pulled the quilt over herself, and wrapped herself into a little cocoon.
The wooden doll was thus forgotten at the side of the bed.
Zheng Xuening stared at the bundle of quilt, was silent for a moment, then staggered over and burrowed in from the bottom.
When it touched the girl’s soft calf, the wooden doll froze, stiffening for a moment.
In the darkness, she could clearly hear the little girl’s soft sobs. Her breaths were light, her nose a little stuffy. She seemed like a small animal that had cried its fill, inexplicably evoking a sense of guilt.
Zheng Xuening, who had never bowed her head to anyone in her life, hesitated for a moment.
“Stop crying.”
She tried to coax someone, but she clearly had no experience.
Lu Dieqing could only hear the little doll’s voice in her mind—cold and devoid of emotional fluctuation.
She didn’t move, nor did she respond.
Lu He was right. Her daughter, though she looked timid and obedient, had a stubborn streak when it came to things she cared about.
Zheng Xuening received no reply.
The Crown Princess once again controlled the wooden doll’s body and squeezed out of the quilt.
Without the little girl’s soft voice, she suddenly realized that this room was incredibly simple, perhaps even drafty. She was just a wooden doll, yet she felt cold.
…
Lu Dieqing didn’t sleep well that night; she had a nightmare.
She dreamt that she and her parents were isolated in a black fog, pursued by ferocious beasts that were just about to bite them. She ran, crying, nearly falling several times, only for her parents to pull her back up and continue to flee. In her dream, she kept hoping that her little doll would come to save her. But when she thought of the little doll, for some reason, a wave of sadness washed over her.
She woke up after a night of fleeing. Looking around, the little girl with her red lips and white teeth pressed her lips together and gently rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand.
She slowly recalled everything from last night.
Her little doll had been successfully awakened, but it seemed they hadn’t gotten along very well.
Now fully awake, Lu Dieqing began to regret her behavior from last night.
Why was I so petty with my own little doll?
The little doll has just come into this world. It doesn’t even know what “like” is.
Thinking of this, Lu Dieqing hurriedly picked up the wooden doll, trying to speak to it again.
“I’m sorry, Xinxin…”
However, her apology was like a stone sinking into the sea; there was no response.
The wooden doll lay motionless in her palm, as if it had never woken up at all.
Lu Dieqing started to panic. She didn’t even have time to get dressed. The collar of her undergarment was askew, revealing a small patch of jade-white skin, but she paid it no mind, her eyes fixed on the coarse wooden doll in her palm.
“Xinxin?”
The little girl called out several times, but there was no reply. The room was empty, with only the sound of her own voice.
She was like someone trapped in a nightmare, talking to herself.
In that instant, a doubt arose in Lu Dieqing’s mind—had her Xinxin truly come to life?
Could it be that it was all just a dream she had last night?
The little girl knelt on the bed. A faint light from the window cast onto half her face. Her profile was delicate and small. Her crimson lips moved, and she murmured the name “Xinxin” once more.
In the room with no echo, the girl, though illuminated by the sun, seemed to have lost her light, emanating an aura of loss and sorrow.
…
“Your Highness? Shall you change to attend court?”
The young palace maid on duty in Changning Palace saw movement on the bed and immediately asked in a low voice.
Zheng Xuening waved her hand.
She propped her cheek on one hand, her eyes slightly closed, recalling everything from last night.
The little hostage, in her fit of pique, had ignored her all night, just crying herself to sleep.
Zheng Xuening ground her teeth. When she lifted her eyes, her gaze was like the stars.
“I will change,” she said coldly.
She was going to the Library Pavilion to corner someone.
