Overly Intense [Criminal Investigation] 15

Chapter 15: Applying Fertilizer for Her

“I don’t want to play these games with her.”

“What games?”

Liu Jia saw the defeated expression in Qin Luo’s reflection in the rearview mirror and asked with a smile, “When you’re in your prime, you have to play the game. I’ve seen you go back and forth for years with no end in sight. It’s a waste of your keyboard-tapping speed.”

“…”

“What I hate most is the way you pick apart life’s nuances in the details.” Liu Jia took off the sunglasses from the top of her head and handed them to Qin Luo. “You say you want to give people respect, to keep a good distance, but you’re actually dying of impatience. I’ve been your friend for twenty years. I know what you’re going to do before you even lift your foot.”

Qin Luo fiddled with the arms of the sunglasses. “I just want to let things happen naturally.”

Liu Jia turned her head to observe Qin Luo’s expression.

Hmm… it was the desolation that comes after letting things happen naturally for too many years.

“Admit it!! You have belonging anxiety.” At this, Liu Jia suddenly thought of a topic for the company. “There you have it, the topic for your next reading group: Standardization and the Sense of Belonging.”

Qin Luo glared at her. “How does your mind jump around like that?”

“Am I wrong?” Liu Jia counted on her fingers for Qin Luo. “You’re in your prime, you have social achievements, you have money. If you don’t find a place to belong soon, your mentality will become marginalized. Besides, isn’t the point of living to find some fun for yourself? What you’re missing now is a companion to help you digest what you have, to satisfy those empty, grandiose life meanings.”

“…”

Liu Jia waved her hand. “The two of you are so wishy-washy, it’s annoying. Just watch me today. I guarantee I’ll get to the bottom of it for you.”

***

Liu Jia screeched to a halt in the rooftop parking lot of the complex.

As one of the co-producers, she was basically just the one who paid the bills without much say. But the purpose of her trip today was to discuss the media promotion budget with Li Wenping. They weren’t just targeting the domestic market with this film; they were also aiming for awards at international film festivals.

The elevator went down from the top floor.

Liu Jia adjusted her makeup and hair in the mirror, and seeing Qin Luo’s listless expression, she reached out to straighten the details of her shirt.

The elevator stopped on the second floor. Liu Jia rushed out first, heading straight for the conference room.

Qin Luo couldn’t keep up with her and had to walk slowly. She was also digesting the good advice from the love guru, Director Liu.

She did want to let things happen naturally, but who knew that after their meeting at the Japanese restaurant, Shen Yiyi had never contacted her again.

Two weeks wasn’t a long time for a thirty-four-year-old. It passed in the blink of an eye.

But for someone who wanted to change a relationship after being moved, it was a huge failure.

Shen Yiyi wasn’t interested in her, had no thoughts about her, not even a little bit of curiosity.

Qin Luo didn’t want to admit it was a failure. After all, there was a strange magnetic field between people. Forcing a response would disrupt the original beautiful rhythm. But she also resented herself for understanding these principles.

How wonderful it would be if she didn’t understand. Back at eighteen, she could have been a savage suitor, meticulously feeding her emotions to the other person, romantically believing that she would only love her in this lifetime, a gambling-style binding, a love to the death.

At this thought, Qin Luo took out her phone and typed a line in her notes—To sever, you must first sever the one with the brain.

But before she could finish typing, she heard Liu Jia’s exclamation from the conference room.

“Shen Yiyi!!!!”

The three words set off an alarm in Qin Luo’s head. She hurried toward the conference room.

As she pushed open the door, she saw Liu Jia enthusiastically hugging Shen Yiyi.

Shen Yiyi, caught in the embrace, looked constrained. When her eyes met Qin Luo’s as she entered, her expression became even more bewildered, her hair disheveled…

“Shen Yiyi!!! Long time no see.” After her enthusiastic social greeting, Liu Jia took a step back and asked with a puzzled look, “You… what are you doing here?”

After asking, Liu Jia didn’t give Shen Yiyi a chance to answer. She turned to Qin Luo, winking and saying excitedly, “Holy shit! Qin Luo! Look who it is! It’s Shen Yiyi!!”

She was putting on a great performance: she had never expected to see the top student who had given her the cold shoulder in high school at today’s event. Although it was common knowledge that she and Qin Luo had started a company together, she had never heard her name from Qin Luo’s lips in the past two weeks. She was doing her best to show Shen Yiyi that Qin Luo was giving her a taste of her own medicine.

Qin Luo didn’t want to play games with Shen Yiyi, but she also didn’t want to embarrass Liu Jia. So she calmly explained, “We met on the first day of the table read. She’s here to give the actors a training course.”

“What? You… you’ve met?”

Liu Jia’s acting skills had been honed to perfection over years of socializing. She could always wrap those narcissistic old men at dinner parties around her little finger, the kind who could praise and curse someone at the same time.

Qin Luo walked to Liu Jia’s side and gently squeezed her arm, a subtle reminder not to go too far.

Liu Jia nudged Qin Luo away with her shoulder. “What’s wrong with you, Qin Luo? Why are you hiding things from me… You two…”

She pointed a finger at Qin Luo, then another at Shen Yiyi. The two fingertips moved closer together. She even slowed down so that Dr. Shen could see clearly.

When the fingertips touched, Liu Jia exclaimed, “Don’t tell me history is repeating itself.”

Liu Jia said the words “history is repeating itself” loudly, as if it were a test, at an age where everyone understood, with a hidden, unspeakable ambition.

Qin Luo took the opportunity to look at Shen Yiyi, searching for a crack in her expression, hoping for an unexpected gain.

But Shen Yiyi just smiled and deflected with a lighthearted joke, “Not yet. I’ll let you know if it does.”

“Not yet” was an option that could be waited for.

Liu Jia caught the implication in Shen Yiyi’s words and waved her hand with a smile. “No need. Our great Screenwriter Qin doesn’t go for the heart anymore. She only goes for the adrenaline. A temporary thrill is superfluous to her.”

Shen Yiyi’s gaze shifted from Liu Jia to Qin Luo’s face, just observing, not answering.

Qin Luo averted her gaze and patted Liu Jia’s shoulder. “Weren’t you going to find President Li to discuss the payment? It’s already past nine.”

“Oh, look at me. I got so excited seeing an old classmate that I forgot about business.”

Liu Jia slapped her forehead, then took a business card from her bag and handed it over. “Yiyi, Qin Luo and I started a company together. The address is on here. We’re all in Shanghai, so if you have time, come and hang out with us! I have to go now, but let’s catch up later.”

“Okay.” Shen Yiyi took the business card.

Liu Jia walked to the door and pointed at the two of them. “You two are not allowed to chat secretly behind my back. If you’re going to chat, you have to create a group chat, so that if things get heated, I’m not the one who ends up suffering.”

The door closed, and the two were left in silence.

Qin Luo waited until Liu Jia’s footsteps faded before speaking slowly, “Liu Jia was just joking.”

Shen Yiyi had her hands in her pockets. “Which part?”

“Hmm?” Qin Luo didn’t understand.

“Which part of what Liu Jia said was a joke?” Shen Yiyi asked calmly. “The part about me coming to hang out with you, or the part about things getting heated, or what?”

Qin Luo was tired of standing. “She just got stressed seeing you suddenly. Her mouth started running off. Don’t take it seriously.”

“Stressed from seeing me?”

Qin Luo was polite and direct. “Maybe because I always put her in the middle of us back then. She not only had to take your cold shoulder, but also had to find ways to comfort me. I didn’t handle her emotions well before I came, which is why she sounded so aggressive. I apologize to you on her behalf.”

Apologizing on her behalf sounded like drawing a clear line in the sand.

“Liu Jia is always direct with people she knows. She’ll forget what she was upset about today by tomorrow.” When Shen Yiyi didn’t reply, Qin Luo continued to make excuses for her friend.

“Do you mind?”

The two of them stood at a distance, the not-too-close, not-too-far distance of friends.

Qin Luo thought, maybe it was because she hadn’t put on proper eye makeup today that her perception was lacking. She didn’t quite understand what Shen Yiyi was asking.

She studied Shen Yiyi’s face carefully.

Her makeup-free face was plain and simple, not much different from anyone else’s. But she was sitting on a throne of her own imagination, holding the chips to cash in on her rights. And so her own desires were passively shattered, and she couldn’t help but want to possess her, to fill her emptiness. A person who desires victory will be more concerned with the score difference, more concerned with winning and losing.

Qin Luo took a deep breath.

Liu Jia was right. She had belonging anxiety. The foolish idea of wanting someone to be hers was bound to happen sooner or later. “Sex is power” was truly inescapable.

“Mind what?” But Qin Luo wanted to know what kind of “minding” she was asking about.

Shen Yiyi said, “The past.”

Qin Luo’s answer was almost instantaneous. “I used to.”

She had indeed minded. She had wanted a definite answer to prove that it wasn’t her fault, that it wasn’t her lack of courage, her lack of ability, and certainly not a regret caused by gender. She had minded the loss of her self-esteem, minded the unrequited love, minded what the other person would remember about her years later.

She shrugged at Shen Yiyi. “But I don’t anymore.”