Chapter 234: I’m So Happy, Alright?
If you never had any expectations, then it’s better not to have any from the start. Because living like that is too tiring.
“Linna, what’s wrong? Are you not feeling well?”
Dai Wenqian saw that her face didn’t look too good and asked with concern.
“I’m fine, just thinking about some things. Can you talk to me for a bit? I’ve been so bored lately.”
“Of course.”
Yu Linna smiled.
Anyway, holding onto expectations won’t get a response, so let’s not have any. Because living like that is too tiring.
She couldn’t help but recall her past. How many times in her life had she lived with expectations? Every time she held onto them, the final result was pain. Nangong Ying was the best example.
Ye Zhiyun, in the end, had still left her. She had been too naive, thinking everything was too beautiful.
It turned out she shouldn’t have trusted anyone from the very beginning.
Dai Wenqian stayed with her for a long time, talking about many things. When she was leaving, she said they should hang out again when they were free. Yu Linna just smiled and nodded. After seeing her friend off, the smile on Yu Linna’s face faded. She felt a deep sense of exhaustion in her heart. This game of friendship was always so tiring. She didn’t want to work anymore either. She took this time to wash the dirty clothes that had accumulated over two days. Ever since she had a formal job, her life had been without a regular routine for a long time. What was her life like before? She could hardly remember.
She was really a glutton for punishment. In the past, she was satisfied just to have food to eat. Now that she didn’t have to worry about going hungry, she had become greedy, wanting more. Why couldn’t she be content?
Forget it. Letting go of some things, isn’t that fine too?
Yeah…
If I let go…
“Isn’t it fine…”
She gave a bitter laugh.
She had thought she would have a different life, but in the end, she was still a golden-haired loser, destined to never succeed. Forget it. Don’t expect anything from now on. Nothing is eternal. It basically doesn’t exist. Just face the facts.
The next day, when Zhao Yuyan came over for a free meal, she found the lights in the living room were still on. They clearly hadn’t been turned off since last night. She knocked on her room door, and Yu Linna came out to open it with a soft voice. Compared to a few days ago, Yu Linna was thinner, her face pale, with obvious dark circles under her eyes. Her already small frame looked like it could collapse at any moment.
“You didn’t pull an all-nighter, did you?”
Having had plenty of all-nighter experience herself, Zhao Yuyan could tell at a glance. She just hadn’t expected this girl, Yu Linna, to be working herself to the bone again. She knew that Sister Chen had just reminded her not to let Yu Linna overwork two days ago.
“Yeah. I couldn’t sleep anyway, so I just worked. Look, I finished the novels for October and November. I plan to start drawing the illustrations today. I’m going to publish two books next month.”
She smiled, completely unaffected by the all-nighter, and even seemed a little excited.
This, this girl is working herself to death…
Zhao Yuyan was stunned. She knew many people in the professional circle, but she had probably never seen anyone work as hard as her.
Thinking about it carefully, from the very beginning of her creation, she was the one who had spent seven days and six nights writing the first volume of Ballad of the Enchantress. She was a bona fide workaholic emperor.
Is this girl trying to kill herself?
“I say, Little Nana, it’s a good thing to work hard, but you’re still young. If you treat your body like this for a long time, you’ll develop health problems. What if you end up with a chronic illness in the future?”
Although Zhao Yuyan was in no position to say these things, the thought of this girl working so desperately made her heart ache a little.
She was still so young, not as old as her. Why was she working so hard?
Besides, she wasn’t short on money. She could just enjoy the money she earned like her. This girl only knew how to make money, not how to spend it. What was the point of that?
“Sister Yuyan, I don’t have many strengths, just diligence. I want to work a little harder, do a little more. Only then can I show my value.”
She smiled faintly, looking at the finished novel on her computer screen. She felt a full sense of accomplishment. These were her works, her children, her life’s treasures. She had had nothing since she was a child, and no one had ever given her anything. But now it was different. She had novels. Novels would not betray her. She could walk through life with her novels.
There were so many things she wanted to do. She wanted to write for a lifetime, to make her name known to the world. She wanted to make Chenghe Company, which had hurt her, regret their foolish decision. She also wanted to make the parents who had abandoned her regret their decision.
At this moment, she only had one thing to say, a sentence that was quite chuunibyou, but also best suited her mood.
I am the strongest.
Yes, only I am the most amazing. I will make everyone who looked down on me regret it.
“Little Nana, rest. You’re tired.”
Zhao Yuyan went over and closed her laptop. Now Yu Linna was anxious. She rushed over to open it, but her hand was pressed down by Zhao Yuyan.
“Rest.”
She said in a tone that brooked no refusal.
“I’m not resting! I still have to work! I have to continue!”
“Is there any point in going on like this?”
“Why is there no point? I’m so good like this. I keep working, I keep trying hard. I have a lot of money, I can make a lot of money. And so many people like me, so many people care about me. My hourly income is more than my previous monthly income. Why shouldn’t I work? I no longer have to worry about going hungry, no longer have to envy others for buying new clothes. I’m richer than all of them now. Why shouldn’t I work?”
Yu Linna’s state seemed very bad. If it were any other time, she definitely wouldn’t have said these things.
There was definitely something wrong with her.
Zhao Yuyan still held her hand, not letting her move. Although Yu Linna was struggling, her strength was not as great as hers.
“Little Nana, if you go on like this, you’ll collapse.”
“I’ll collapse? How could I collapse?! At my poorest, I ate half a steamed bun for three days. At my hungriest, I even ate food from the trash can. My most difficult time was when I was fired by five bosses in a row. My most painful time was when I was betrayed by my best friend. At my coldest, I didn’t even have a single cotton quilt, only a thin, tattered one. Compared to before, isn’t my life good enough now? I have food to eat and a place to live. I don’t have to go hungry or cold. How could I collapse! I’m so happy right now, alright!”
As she spoke, she even smiled.
The more it was like this, the more worried one became. Zhao Yuyan understood that this girl had already fallen into a kind of frenzied mode. She wanted to use work to numb herself, to use high-intensity work to force herself to forget unpleasant things. She could relate to this very well.
She just hadn’t expected this girl to have such a hard life. Before, she only knew that her family background was not good, but she hadn’t expected her to have such a past.
“Little Nana, you’re tired. Go to sleep.”
“Sleep? My time is very precious. I’m not sleeping!”
“You can always make money. If your health is gone, money can’t buy it back.”
“What are you talking to me about health for? To hell with it! What health, what body? How can you people who are loved by your families understand my feelings? Why should I care about these things? I only care about which day I can live to.”
Yu Linna truly had a hard life, having never had a good day since she was a child. Now that her life had finally improved, she had encountered so many things, losing her friends one after another.
Zhao Yuyan had no choice but to call Chen Xi and ask her to come and handle it. After hearing about this, Chen Xi rushed over from the editorial department, calmed Yu Linna down, and after much persuasion, got her to put down her computer and go back to her room to rest. But Yu Linna clearly couldn’t sleep. Chen Xi had no choice but to give her a sleeping pill. At first, Yu Linna refused to take it, but Chen Xi was insistent and made her eat it.
Not long after taking the sleeping pill, Yu Linna locked herself in her room and didn’t come out. She had probably fallen asleep.
“Sigh, this girl is really hard to handle.”
Chen Xi also felt a headache. Taking care of this girl was like taking care of a daughter.
But there was nothing to be done about it. Such a cute and moe girl, if she were left alone, she would feel very sorry.
“Sister Chen, what do you think happened to Little Nana?”
“I don’t know. Probably something on her mind. Looking at her, she seems to be sad.”
“Don’t tell me she was dumped by her boyfriend…”
“Do you, a single dog, have the right to say that about others?”
After roasting her, Chen Xi took out two candies from her pocket, handed one to Zhao Yuyan, and unwrapped one for herself, putting it in her mouth. The sweet taste of the candy spread in her throat, but her heart was anything but sweet.
“Shion-sensei, she’s quite pitiful. She was sold back and forth by human traffickers since she was a child. It was the police who rescued her from the traffickers, but they don’t know who her parents are, and she doesn’t know either. She was too young then. The reason she cares so much about her work is probably because she’s also afraid, afraid that this job will be like her previous part-time jobs, where she would be fired. She has been living in fear, always worrying that she’s not doing well enough. Even though with her achievements, no one would dare to give up on her so easily, but she just likes to overthink things.”
It was the first time Chen Xi had talked so much about things other than work in front of Zhao Yuyan. It made Zhao Yuyan see her in a new light.
“Little Nana, she’s so pitiful.”
Hearing about her background, as a girl, Zhao Yuyan also felt her heart ache. She felt it was unfair for this girl to have suffered so much. She was such a cute and moe girl. How could God be so cruel to her?
“It’s impossible to make her let go of the past. Now, we can only hope that she can get through it on her own. I don’t want to put too much pressure on her either. Shion-sensei is an excellent writer, but she’s also just a girl who isn’t even twenty years old yet.”
Perhaps because Yu Linna’s achievements were too glorious, and the things she did were too shocking, people subconsciously forgot that she was just a child. She was far from reaching the standard of an adult who could bear all responsibilities.
“Alright, I should get back to work. Air-sensei, you take good care of her. Remember to submit my manuscript on time.”
After saying that, Chen Xi stood up and left. By this time, her candy had almost melted.
Zhao Yuyan looked at the closed room door, not knowing if Yu Linna was really asleep. She still felt a little worried. She tried to open her door, but it was locked from the inside, so she gave up.
Although she was worried, there was nothing she could do. She had to go back to her own home. Zhao Yuyan found that she didn’t even have the mood to play games anymore.
