Chapter 462: Variety Shows Are Too Hardcore
The movie began to play on the TV, and Yu Linna was watching it all along. This movie was called Pocket Money. It was a work from the child star era of the Chinese-American star, Belia. Her stage name in China was An Xiayue.
This work was mainly a daily, heartwarming light comedy, which unfolded with the story of a little girl, and thus triggered various stories. This movie still held a high score of 8 on the Douzi website. An Xiayue, this Chinese-American star, was indeed very famous when she was little, and her works were also very good. Although the proportion of Chinese blood in her body was less than half, this was not a big problem. Many domestic fans thought that she should be classified as a Chinese star.
“It’s pretty good.”
“Right? I told you. Belia’s appearance as a child is quite similar to yours. Are you two really not relatives?”
“No.”
After putting away the disc, Yu Linna went to look for other DVDs. When she was bored, she wanted to watch movies. Although watching a movie locally in England was a good choice, she was too lazy to go out and still chose to watch a DVD in the hotel.
“Linna, you can take me with you on the day of the recording.”
“I’m going to work, not to play.”
“I know. I’m just bored in the hotel. Take me with you. I won’t cause any trouble.”
“Shouldn’t you be contacting your parents soon? Your phone has been charged for a while now.”
“I’ve blocked them. I won’t be leaving them in the future. Compared to that, you should just take me to play… no, take me to see the world.”
Stephanie did not want to contact her parents. She preferred to walk around in this place, to go wherever there was fun.
As for her own family matters, Yu Linna, with her traditional Chinese way of thinking, did not plan to get involved. Since she felt that this was fine, then there was no need for her to be nosy.
…
On the day of the program recording, Yu Linna got in the car as agreed, and also brought Stephanie along. She had told Maria about Stephanie’s situation, and had her sit in the audience. And she herself also stood on the stage of the variety show, waiting for the cameraman to be ready. The organizers had already told her the script in advance, telling her to be a little more mischievous, and that there might also be a prank segment. Yu Linna had said she knew. This was her first time on a British variety show. She had to treat it seriously.
And her American English, she had to adapt to the British environment. Although her English was not bad, her pronunciation was completely American English. It wasn’t that she couldn’t speak British English, it was just that she wasn’t used to it.
To adapt to the program, she could only make corresponding adjustments.
“Welcome to this issue of Entertainment Star Show. I’m Jonos. We have invited many guests for this issue, including the familiar David, and Vivian, as well as this issue’s new guest, her name is Yu Linna. Hearing this, you will be very confused. Jonos is here today to answer for you. Please welcome Yu Linna to the stage.”
Amidst a sparse round of applause, Yu Linna stepped onto the stage, along with the other guests of this issue. This program was essentially a star entertainment prank show. There was not much to say, just that Yu Linna, as a foreigner, had been invited in for the first time.
As soon as she entered the stage, the audience at the scene was very confused. Hearing her name, she was Chinese, but how did a European come up?
“Although Yu Linna is Chinese, she is a mixed-race, and her appearance is more inclined towards English and American. But her nationality is Chinese, and her English is very good. At the same time, she is also a Chinese writer and screenwriter. Her pen name is… what was your pen name again?”
“My pen name is Shion. Good evening everyone. My name is Yu Linna, and my pen name is Shion. How are you?”
According to the British custom, Yu Linna had greeted them in English. To be honest, with her appearance, if she hadn’t deliberately mentioned it, no one would have known that she was actually Chinese. Her appearance was too similar to a European or American. Although a careful look would reveal Asian features, at first glance, one would definitely think that this was an American or a British person.
The host, Jonos, had interviewed several guests. When he handed the microphone to Yu Linna, he didn’t know what to ask and could only say:
“Hello, Yu. Are you used to being in England? I hear this is your first time in England.”
“Yes. This is my first time.”
“How do you feel?”
“Mmm, this is a very great country. The food, the architecture, the culture are all very good. By the way, I really like Sunday roast.”
“Really? Actually, I also really like Sunday roast. You have great taste!”
“Thank you.”
For now, the topic was opened, and the audience also had a reaction. Yu Linna was relieved. This place was not like Japan. It was her first time here, so she had to make a good impression.
“Yu, I hear you’re a writer from China? Are you sure you’re not an actress?”
“No, I’m a writer, and also a screenwriter. I’ve written a few works. You can try to read them.”
“Is that so? Coincidentally, I’ve also brought some information about you. I’ll put it on the big screen now.”
The host, Jonos, opened a few important works of Yu Linna’s career on the big screen, such as Ballad of the Enchantress, Dawn Assassin, The Big Sister Head is a Teacher, and The Smile of the Rose. These works passed by like a revolving lantern, introducing Yu Linna’s creative footsteps. This was an introduction segment that the organizers had already agreed on. Yu Linna hoped that through this promotion, she could make a name for herself in England. But clearly, the effect was not very good, because the reaction of the audience at the scene was not particularly enthusiastic.
Helpless, the game entered the next segment. Yu Linna and the other few guests entered the prank segment together, hoping to use this method to attract attention and to get the audience’s attention.
“You guys can share some funny stories with everyone,” the host said.
“Oh, speaking of funny things. I remember when I was little, I stole my mom’s money to buy my favorite manga book. As a result, my mom chased me all over the street and beat me. I was crying and rolling on the ground. I accidentally rolled into a neighbor’s horse trough and got covered in horse manure.”
“What’s so funny about that? When I was in middle school, I was confessed to by a male god. Guess what he said? He said, ‘Oh, my goddess, you’re so beautiful. You’re so beautiful. Why don’t you have a drink with me?’ And then he was dragged home by his dad and was given a good beating.”
The guests were all sharing their own funny stories. Although the effect was not particularly good, at least they could say something. Yu Linna thought for a long time and didn’t know what to say. By the time the host had handed her the microphone, she still didn’t know what to say.
“Let me think. I don’t seem to have much to share. But I was very naughty as a child, often fighting and stealing things. Once, I was hungry and wanted to eat, but I had no money, so I went to steal the shop owner’s steamed buns. At that time, I was too small and couldn’t run away. The boss caught me and gave me a good beating. While he was hitting me, he said, ‘You’re such a little bitch. Why did you have to steal my steamed buns?’ I said, ‘Because there are so many steamed bun shops on the street, and yours is the most expensive. Others sell them for 1 yuan, but you sell them for 3 yuan. Even if I steal yours, you won’t starve to death.’ And then the boss beat me fiercely.”
Yu Linna tried to tell her story with a very exaggerated expression and a very mischievous look. She deliberately packaged her very miserable story into an embarrassing incident. Unexpectedly, the effect was quite good. The audience at the scene all laughed. Even Yu Linna had not expected it.
“Your story is quite interesting. Is there more?”
“Let me think. I used to have no money in my hands, and my family wouldn’t give me food. I went to work in a restaurant, but the restaurant wouldn’t give me food. I wanted to eat the leftovers in the shop, but the boss wouldn’t let me. So I squatted at the entrance of the shop, crying and shouting, ‘The boss is abusing child labor!’ The boss was shocked and quickly gave me a bowl of delicious food, begging me, ‘Don’t be like this. If you’re like this, our shop will have to close down.'”
The audience laughed louder and louder.
Even the host had not expected such a scene. The effect was unexpectedly good. Sometimes, if you package a very miserable story, it can instantly become a great comedy. This was also the first time Yu Linna had experienced it.
Next was the prank segment. The host gave a few explodingly spicy peppers to the guests, had them sit down and eat them, and then introduced the host’s questions. The few guests had a look of crying on their faces as they ate them, and then they all turned into red butts.
Yu Linna held the pepper, pinched her nose, and endured all kinds of discomfort. With a grit of her teeth, she put it in her mouth. Instantly, her face flushed, and tears flowed out. She wanted to drink water, but the host wouldn’t let her and even mischievously brought the microphone to her side.
“Yu, how does this pepper taste?”
“Spicy… super spicy…”
“So may I ask, have you ever been in a relationship? What kind of person is your partner?”
“…This pepper is quite spicy.”
At this, Yu Linna couldn’t hold back her tears. They flowed down in a stream. A cute little face was covered in tear stains, which made people laugh and couldn’t help but want to bully her.
It was just that everyone didn’t know that Yu Linna’s stomach was now perforated from the spiciness.
“You can’t escape. Quick, say it. Where is your boyfriend?”
“I don’t have a boyfriend… who invented this pepper? It’s too spicy…”
“Do you really not have a boyfriend?”
“So spicy, so spicy…”
“What do your parents do for a living?”
“…I have to admit, this pepper is quite flavorful, even more flavorful than the Chongqing chili in our country.”
“What are you planning to write for your next work?”
“Let me think. I’ll just write a story about a pepper and a bad host…”
The host still wanted to dig out some interesting stories from her mouth, but as a result, Yu Linna had held it in. But her performance this time was particularly good. The audience at the scene laughed very happily, and the effect of the program was also very good. Later, the ratings of this issue were also very good.
As a price, Yu Linna’s throat had exploded. For several days, she couldn’t say a few words and had even gone to the hospital for a stomach pump. She had originally come to England to work, but had accidentally ruined her body. Come to think of it, it was quite sad.
But later, when Yu Linna saw that the issue of the program she had recorded had a very high rating on TV, she also felt that her efforts were worth it. It was just that her body had been made very bad.
“Really, you can’t eat spicy food, yet you still ate something so spicy. That pepper is world-class spicy. If you can’t eat it, you should have just honestly told the host.”
Afterwards, Stephanie still had to take care of her, gave her some medicine, and told her to lie down in bed. Yu Linna also felt that her current self was a bit of a self-inflicted mess.
