Chapter 12:

◎”Little Sickly One, you need to live a little happier.”◎

After being back for so long, Yu Qinjiu was still staying at a chain hotel. When Yu Qinjiu gave the name of some hotel, Ji Qingyou was dazed for a moment, but she still called Ji Xiruan and explained why she couldn’t be the driver.

The snow in Nanwu was falling quite heavily. By the time they left the KTV, the chaotic street scene was layered with white. Snow was still falling, as if to become a snow that spanned years.

Neither of them had brought an umbrella, but both were wearing scarves.

Their feet trod on the soft snow, leaving behind one straight line of footprints, and another set that meandered erratically, twisting away somewhere unknown.

Ji Qingyou walked silently behind Yu Qinjiu, worried that the drunk girl might mistake the snow layer for the most interesting thing in her sight and proceed to study it on the spot.

Suddenly.

Yu Qinjiu’s unsteady steps veered to the side, nearly bumping into a passerby.

Ji Qingyou grabbed her wrist just in time. Under the friendly gaze of the passerby, she murmured an apology and looked back at Yu Qinjiu. Yu Qinjiu seemed to be staring at the point where their wrists and palms touched.

A magical winter night. It lifted their scarves in identical arcs, blowing the fluttering snowflakes through the gap between them, as if slowing down time.

Numb, stiff fingertips met cold body temperature. Ji Qingyou let go, belatedly realizing that Yu Qinjiu’s hands were so cold, even her wrists were cold.

Even though she had been drinking.

But every time Yu Qinjiu touched her, her fingertips were always slightly warm.

Ji Qingyou studied her expression. “Cold?”

Not knowing how much she had drunk, Yu Qinjiu reacted slowly. She withdrew the hand hovering in the air into her coat pocket and shook her head. “Not really.”

As she spoke, she stumbled again, nearly falling.

Ji Qingyou steadied her. “I’ll carry you.”

Yu Qinjiu stared at her for a few seconds, then lightly raised her arms, as naturally as before.

“Okay.”

Ji Qingyou crouched down slightly. When Yu Qinjiu carefully climbed onto her back, the wind brought Yu Qinjiu’s scent and body temperature over, icy cold, causing goosebumps to rise behind Ji Qingyou’s ears.

“My body is very cold.” Yu Qinjiu shrank back, trying not to lean on her. “You should put me down.”

Ji Qingyou didn’t put her down. She shifted Yu Qinjiu to a more secure position and treaded lightly on the snow beneath her feet. When snowflakes fell on her glasses, her vision blurred.

It was a little inconvenient. Just as she was about to speak.

Yu Qinjiu anticipated her thought. She took off her glasses, restoring clear vision, her fingers not touching her skin.

She tried not to pass on her cold body temperature.

After taking off the glasses, Yu Qinjiu’s hands, which were resting lightly on her neck, tightened a little, carrying a gradually warming body temperature. Ji Qingyou walked forward, hearing Yu Qinjiu’s soft voice reach her ear.

“I know you’re not nearsighted.”

Breathed into her ear, Yu Qinjiu’s breath carried the faint, sweet scent of alcohol.

—Ji Qingyou’s imaginary allergen.

She was silent, looking down at the deepening footprints beneath her feet. She said nothing.

The wind lifted Yu Qinjiu’s slightly curled strands of hair, embedding them into the hollow of her neck. Yu Qinjiu exhaled a puff of white air, trying to control her drunken reaction, and spoke softly to her.

“Your eyes are very beautiful.”

Ji Qingyou’s steps slowed down inexplicably. Yu Qinjiu had said this sentence ten years ago, more than once. She said it again after coming back. Ji Qingyou understood very well why Yu Qinjiu said it.

Ever since entering this hospital, everyone would add a prefix to Ji Qingyou’s name—Director Qin’s daughter from Neurosurgery, Qin Shuangchi’s younger sister, the youngest associate chief in Obstetrics and Gynecology.

She was increasingly afraid that she couldn’t live up to this prefix.

Just as she had been afraid since she was very young, afraid that she couldn’t become a doctor like Qin Bailan and Qin Shuangchi, afraid of the clumsiness she unconsciously showed that didn’t fit with the Qin family.

The most obvious thing was her eyes, which looked completely different from the Qins’ eyes.

It made her feel out of place.

So she wore glasses with no prescription, trying to hide the softness and hesitation within her. It didn’t really change anything, only gave her some comfort.

So that her fear could be hidden.

But Yu Qinjiu very much wanted to puncture this layer of fear, make her fearless, like the Yu Qinjiu of old.

She could always see through her immediately.

Ji Qingyou couldn’t argue with Yu Qinjiu. “Is that so?”

“Ji Qingyou, you don’t have to be like them all the time.” In the silent footsteps, Yu Qinjiu’s drunken voice sounded very soft, as if soaked through with moisture.

“No one will say anything about you.”

Ji Qingyou’s eyelashes trembled. Her steps became sluggish.

Yu Qinjiu tightened her arms around her again, comforting her word by word. “Don’t be afraid. Even if you take off your glasses, you’re still Dr. Ji. Even if you don’t look like them, you’re still an amazing Dr. Ji.”

“You don’t have to force yourself to catch up to them, and you don’t have to pretend you don’t care. If you can’t catch up, then you can’t. If you care, then you care. It’s no big deal.”

The whole paragraph seemed to drain Yu Qinjiu’s energy. Her speech slowed, her head sank lower, her soft breath nestled into the hollow of Ji Qingyou’s neck. Her voice was so light it was almost carried away by the wind.

“Little Sickly One, you need to live a little happier.”

The icy snowflakes landed on the tip of Ji Qingyou’s nose. She suddenly remembered the new connotation Yu Qinjiu had once given the word “happiness”:

On a birthday, Yu Qinjiu received a love letter. The first line said “Happy Birthday.” She curled her lip and said, “I think wishing someone happiness is what it means to really like them. Because we often put a prefix in front of the word ‘happiness,’ like Happy Birthday, Happy New Year, Happy New Year’s Day, Happy End of the World… But we rarely say it directly—Wish you happiness.”

“So those who only say ‘Happy Birthday’ don’t really like you.”

Yu Qinjiu was always unique. Everything she did and said had its own logic and reasoning. And Ji Qingyou was always habitually inclined to believe that Yu Qinjiu’s reasoning was traceable.

2022 was coming to an end.

As they passed by the riverbank, a timed fireworks display began, exploding in the sky with dazzling, chaotic light. It was loud and boisterous, as if the whole city was flipping and spinning in a countdown.

Yu Qinjiu woke up from the noise.

She gently patted Ji Qingyou’s shoulder twice.

Ji Qingyou put her down. Her arms were already stiff and numb, but she still held onto Yu Qinjiu, afraid she would fall into the river.

Yu Qinjiu saw her worry. She curved her eyes, smiled at her, steadied herself after standing up, and put her hands in her pockets. Watching the fireworks blooming in the distant sky, she sighed.

“So beautiful.”

Ji Qingyou looked at her and hummed in agreement. Her gaze turned to the sky. “Yeah, it’s quite beautiful.”

“Then am I more beautiful, or the fireworks?” Yu Qinjiu suddenly asked.

Ji Qingyou was stunned, unsure how to answer.

Yu Qinjiu laughed again and bumped her shoulder. “Can’t you even lie to me for a bit?”

Ji Qingyou understood. “The fireworks are more beautiful.”

Yu Qinjiu tilted her head to look at her.

Ji Qingyou said softly, “I’m lying.”

“Oh——”

Yu Qinjiu drew out the sound, glanced at her, and her tone became lighter.

“I know you’re lying to me.”

“Of course, I’m the most beautiful,” she added jokingly, lightly. Thin snow had already piled up on her shoulders.

The brilliant bloom of fireworks was as brief as a blink.

But every moment Yu Qinjiu existed seemed as long as eternity.

At this very moment, Yu Qinjiu curved her eyes and smiled. It seemed she had become happy because of Ji Qingyou’s clumsy joke, forgetting those two insincere phone calls.

Ji Qingyou looked down at the scarf around her own neck. Even though she was still used to tying it in this not-so-neat way, it still kept her warm. The watch on her left hand, tucked in her pocket, had been changed to this year’s popular style, given to her by Yu Qinjiu. The glasses she used for pretense had been taken off by Yu Qinjiu.

Yu Qinjiu had descended from the sky, changing her life bound by plans.

But she, what could she bring to Yu Qinjiu?

She couldn’t help but look at Yu Qinjiu and ask, “Yu Qinjiu, are you happy staying in Nanwu?”

She didn’t understand why Yu Qinjiu had suddenly come back.

She also didn’t understand why Yu Qinjiu would take a two-month vacation to come back to Nanwu. It couldn’t really be as Yu Qinjiu said, just to see the first snow.

But at least, she hoped Yu Qinjiu hadn’t come back for Qin Shuangchi and Yu Muzhou’s wedding. She hoped even more that, upon learning of this event, Yu Qinjiu hadn’t factored in that “Qin Shuangchi is her sister” and made this decision.

“Of course, I’m happy.” Yu Qinjiu slightly raised her head to watch the fireworks. Her light pupils reflected the dancing light and the falling snowflakes. The smile at the corners of her mouth was very clear.

Ji Qingyou didn’t quite understand. “Why?”

“Maybe it’s because…”

Yu Qinjiu drew out the sound, looked over, her eyes curved into beautiful crescents. The tear mole at the corner of her eye was cast into shadow, flickering on and off.

“Dr. Ji just smiled, right?”