Chapter 32: I Feel Safe and Happy When I’m With You Part 2

Just as she was feeling troubled, a hand quietly crept onto the back of hers. Fingertips brushed across her skin, tickling slightly. She was about to push it away when the young woman’s soft voice came through: “Mother, did I cause you any trouble?”

“No.” Yan Zhi’an shook her head. “It has nothing to do with me. But your path ahead will be difficult.”

Her voice was very low, much gentler than her usual cold, indifferent tone.

At that moment, Xunqi felt the deep worry in her words. The noisy chatter of the guests faded away, and all she could hear was Yan Zhi’an’s voice—gentle as water, bathing her in a warm spring, suddenly filling her with confidence.

Xunqi laughed softly, then said: “I have no ambitions.”

Those simple five words made Yan Zhi’an turn back in surprise. The young woman’s eyes were bright and lovely, and she suddenly understood—the Young Mistress of the Yan family didn’t need a marriage alliance. It was the Heir Apparent who did.

In an instant, everything became clear. Yan Zhi’an’s expression shifted slightly, then quickly relaxed, as if nothing had happened, and she continued receiving guests as usual.

After the earlier unpleasantness passed, everything went smoothly from then on. Xunqi formally integrated into the circle of noble young ladies in the Capital City. With her status as the sole daughter of the Left Prime Minister, she didn’t need to socialize at all—many people came to play with her on their own.

As for Shiqi, this was also her first time being introduced to everyone as a daughter of the Yan family.

In the afternoon, the guests departed, but the Right Prime Minister stayed behind, going to the Study with the Left Prime Minister to discuss matters. Shiqi pulled Xunqi to her small courtyard, where the young woman from the Yuan family was hidden.

“How did my mother speak to you?” Xunqi was pulled into the courtyard by Shiqi. “Didn’t she say she’d separate you two?”

Shiqi answered: “No. She only told us to stay for now and wait until after the New Year before deciding. A few days ago, she sent for me and said she would arrange an official post for me, sending me to another region. Then no one there would recognize us, and we could live our own lives quietly.”

Xunqi stopped in her tracks. “Is it really that shameful?”

Shiqi smiled bitterly and shook her head repeatedly. “Young Mistress, you’re thinking too simply. Do you know? Just the eyes of the world alone would make you wish you could disappear. They would look at you with strange eyes, even refuse to do business with you. You wouldn’t be able to buy anything you wanted to eat.”

“What you’re saying—I understand.” Xunqi understood now. What truly devoured people wasn’t their own families, but the judgment of the world. They didn’t mind men taking three wives and four concubines, didn’t mind them abandoning their wives and remarrying, yet they bound women with layer upon layer of rules.

She took a deep breath. Shiqi said: “Young Mistress, I know you come from the streets. You should also know that street rumors can devour a person. No Saber needed, no Rope needed—that is the most terrifying thing of all.”

“Come on, let’s go meet your beloved.” Xunqi gave up pondering the question. Better to meet Ah Yuan first.

Ah Yuan was one year older than Shiqi. She should have married last year, but she fell ill once, and the marriage was delayed.

As soon as they entered the courtyard, Xunqi saw rows of wooden racks with Medicinal Herbs drying on them. Curious, she walked over. A young woman of seventeen or eighteen was laying out herbs to dry. Hearing their footsteps, she smiled and said: “Why are you back at this hour? Are things in the front courtyard finished?”

Xunqi looked at her. The woman had a round face, thin and slender eyebrows, bright eyes, and a slightly prominent nose. She was smiling warmly at her and Shiqi.

“It’s the Young Mistress of the Yan family!” Ah Yuan exclaimed in surprise, quickly setting down the herbs. “I haven’t yet thanked you for your kindness in bringing us together.”

“No need for thanks. It was merely a small effort on my part. As long as you and Shiqi are happy.” Xunqi shook her head. “I didn’t really do much for you.”

“You did a great deal.” Ah Yuan dusted the dirt from her hands and hurriedly welcomed the Young Mistress into the house. “Seventeenth Miss, go brew some tea.”

Xunqi sat down and looked around the room. It was simple and clean—clearly these two truly wanted to build a life together.

Shiqi went to brew tea, and Ah Yuan washed her hands before coming over, bringing some Pastry from the room as well. Xunqi asked curiously: “Are you a physician?”

“Yes. Members of my Yuan family either study literature or medicine.” Ah Yuan smiled. “Forgive my poor hospitality. I plan to open a Medicine Shop to make a living, but the Head of the Yan family wants Shiqi to become a local official. We’re still considering our options.”

Shiqi walked over and handed tea to Xunqi, joking: “I don’t really want to be an official. I want to teach. I haven’t thought it through yet.”

“You don’t want to leave the Capital City, do you?” Xunqi could see it. If they stayed in the Capital City, living in the Yan residence, they would have the Head of the Family’s protection. If they left the Capital City, the mountains were high and the Emperor was far away—if Sixth Master Yan ever found them again, who would protect them then?

Besides, the Yuan family never came to the Capital City, so they would never discover that Ah Yuan was still alive.

Ah Yuan smiled softly. “That’s exactly what we mean. But Seventeenth Miss refused the Head of the Family’s offer, and I’m afraid that might anger her.”

“You’re overthinking it. The Head of the Family only seems cold on the surface. She doesn’t hold grudges against her juniors. I’ll relay your intentions to her.” Xunqi felt at ease. She asked Ah Yuan directly: “Are you happy?”

“Naturally, I’m happy. The night we were separated, I had already decided—if we couldn’t be together in life, then we would walk the Yellow Springs together.” Ah Yuan lowered her eyes, her expression helpless. “Thankfully, heaven showed mercy and let me meet you.”

Having helped bring about a good match, Xunqi was delighted herself.

Meanwhile, the two in the Study had closed the door, with Wushuang standing guard outside.

“I saw clearly what happened today. Sima Xun doesn’t think highly of Xunqi at all.” Yan Zhi’an spoke first. “The Duchess of Dingguo’s attitude suggests this marriage was something I insisted upon, and her family was forced into it. They rely on their status as relatives of the Imperial Uncle to look down on the Yan family.”

The Right Prime Minister sat down, stretching her shoulders and back. “In that case, let them learn a lesson. Is there really anyone you and I can’t handle?”

Yan Zhi’an had invited her over precisely for this matter. Since Shangguan Li had spoken up, she naturally only needed to agree.

“That is exactly what I had in mind.” Yan Zhi’an said. “Duke Dingguo oversees the Ministry of Revenue. There’s no cat that doesn’t crave fish.”

The two exchanged a glance, and the Right Prime Minister understood. “I know what to do. You do your part, and I’ll do mine. It’s getting late, so I’ll take my leave.”

She stood up, her expression unchanged. At that moment, Yan Zhi’an spoke: “Right Prime Minister, since you’re helping me, I should return the favor. The rules of the Shangguan family should be changed as well.”

The Right Prime Minister’s expression trembled. She turned to stare at her. “What do you mean?”

“Just wait. I believe Xunqi has the ability to handle this matter. She is the Madwoman’s foster daughter, and she should clear the Madwoman’s name. After the Madwoman died, she was left with only a grave and no tombstone.” Yan Zhi’an lifted her head, her back straight, meeting her gaze frankly. “This is what Xunqi owes the Madwoman. It has nothing to do with you. I saw Xunqi’s capabilities today, and after thinking it over for a moment, she should do something. It will also test her abilities in the process. What do you think?”

“As you wish.” The Right Prime Minister didn’t insist or argue. She left calmly.

Yan Zhi’an watched her retreating figure, trying hard to recall—what kind of person was the Madwoman, really? The Madwoman couldn’t be called a master of strategy, but there was almost nothing she couldn’t do. Just the creation of gunpowder alone would have been enough for Her Majesty to treat her with great respect and invite her into the court. Yet someone like that was willing to hide away in the mountains.

She returned to the Bedroom. Xunqi was sitting under the eaves, holding a piece of wood in her hands. She walked over. “What are you doing?”

“Mother, you’re back.” The young woman looked up, beaming brightly. Gazing at her face, warmth filled her heart. She said: “I met Ah Yuan.”

“Is that so? She’s a good child.” Yan Zhi’an sat down beside her, saying with regret: “They’re both good children.”

“And what about me?” Xunqi asked with a hint of stubbornness. “Am I a good child too?”

Yan Zhi’an was amused into a smile, her tone gentle. “You’re a good child too. By the way, I’ve looked into your foster mother’s background.”

“Hm?” Xunqi was holding the Saber, but suddenly became interested. She set the wood aside. “Was she from the same family as my teacher?”

She had guessed it. Yan Zhi’an was surprised, then said: “They were twin sisters. I don’t know what happened back then, but the name Shangguan Li is your foster mother’s name, and the Right Prime Minister has no name at all.”

“So my teacher’s identity is the Madwoman’s?” Xunqi was astonished.

Yan Zhi’an then recounted everything she had discovered, explaining in detail the rule of ‘twins bring ill fortune.’ Xunqi laughed coldly. “No wonder she calls herself a Madwoman. She really was driven to it. What other family is like the Shangguan Residence?”

“What do you plan to do?” Yan Zhi’an watched her. Xunqi’s nature was to hate evil like an enemy—she would never sit by and do nothing.

Xunqi drooped her head, nuzzling against her mother’s shoulder. Her heart felt wonderfully at ease. She said: “I don’t know what to do yet. Let me think about it. I will seek justice for her. But if I do this, it will throw my teacher into deep water.”

“Then think it over slowly. There’s no rush.” Yan Zhi’an had raised her for over a year now and had already figured out her temperament. Her heart was filled with sympathy.

The Madwoman had raised Xunqi for thirteen years. For all those years, the two had depended on each other. Half of Xunqi’s skills had been taught by the Madwoman. How could she remain indifferent?

The two leaned against each other. Xunqi reached out and hugged her mother’s arm, acting coy: “Mother, I feel very safe and very happy when I’m with you.”

At this moment, she felt warm springs flowing through her heart, her whole body comfortable, with an indescribable sense of ease.

“That’s because I raised you.” Yan Zhi’an laughed at her own words and couldn’t resist reaching out to pinch her nose.

Xunqi let her pinch. “No, that’s not it. When I was with the Madwoman, I never felt this safe. I like being with you.”

Hearing her silly words, Yan Zhi’an didn’t take them seriously. A daughter depending on her mother was only natural. She held her hand. “Then we’ll be together forever. In the future, I’ll find you a husband to bring into the household.”

“I don’t want that. I don’t like having an extra man wandering around the house.” Xunqi refused, nuzzling against her mother’s shoulder. “The Madwoman said women are made of water and men are made of mud. When a woman sees a man, she becomes muddy.”

Yan Zhi’an’s vision went dark. No wonder Xunqi was so resistant to men—it was the Madwoman who had taught her that from childhood. She said helplessly: “But since ancient times, men and women—”

“Mother, do you like men?” Xunqi directly interrupted her. “Am I really your biological daughter?”

She had never seen any trace of a man in the household, and her mother never mentioned her father. Xunqi’s suspicions grew. Even the Madam never mentioned it—everything was strange.

She had her doubts, but she didn’t dare question her mother directly, afraid of hurting her. Since she had the opportunity today, she might as well ask.

Yan Zhi’an’s expression remained unchanged. “He’s been dead for over ten years. What would I want a Portrait for?”

“Where is he buried?” Xunqi pressed on. “Since he’s dead, there must be a burial place. I should go pay my respects, offer incense during the Cold Food Festival and Qingming.”

Yan Zhi’an fell into thought. Where was she supposed to conjure up an old grave for her? A grave over ten years old looked different from a new one.

She was deep in thought, and Xunqi slowly grew more alert. Were these questions really that hard to answer?

If she had borne him a child, there must have been feelings between them. How could she not even say where he was buried?

Xunqi couldn’t help but grow suspicious.