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Chapter 6: Hangover Soup


The gate of the Longevity Palace opened and closed. Shen Yuezhuang, with a lantern in one hand and the other hand lifting her skirt, hunched over and crept along the wall back to the side hall.

On the outer chamber’s daybed, Cuizhu was fast asleep. A calming incense was burning in the gilded censer. As soon as Shen Yuezhuang entered, she let out a huge yawn, blew out the lantern, and fumbled her way into the inner room by the dim moonlight filtering in from outside.

Since this was her first time staying here, and she had also drunk some wine, Shen Yuezhuang stumbled along with a lot of clattering noise. But Cuizhu didn’t wake up.

This little girl had excellent sleep!

If only her father’s sleep were this good!

Shen Yuezhuang breathed a sigh of relief. She rounded the screen, casually tossed her cloak onto a nearby chair, and then flopped herself onto the soft bed.

She let out a comfortable groan. On the chair, the Empress Dowager, who had been waiting all night and was suddenly hit in the face by the flying cloak: “…”

She sighed softly, took the cloak down slowly, folded it over her arm, and then stood up, walking towards the huanghuali wood coat rack by the bed.

Liu Yun’s footsteps were light, but not inaudible. Besides, she hadn’t intended to leave quietly anyway.

Shen Yuezhuang heard the sound and looked suspiciously towards the other side of the room.

She saw Liu Yun hang up the cloak, then walk to the table, take out a bowl of hangover soup from a food box, and sit down very naturally on the edge of the bed.

Shen Yuezhuang glanced at the sour, bitter-looking hangover soup in the small white porcelain bowl. Then she kicked off her shoes and leaned against the wall behind her.

“Since when did Your Grace develop a sleepwalking habit? Not sleeping in the middle of the night, coming here to scare people?”

Liu Yun ignored her sarcasm. She handed the palm-sized bowl to Shen Yuezhuang.

“Hangover soup. Drink it first.”

Shen Yuezhuang sniffled. The heat from the alcohol, which had been warming her head, flared up. “I don’t need it. Your Grace should send it to someone who does,” she said, pulling at her outer robe. “I, your subject, am going to rest.”

She quickly pulled off her outer robe, bundled it up in her hands, then knelt on the edge of the bed. Supporting herself with one hand on the bed, she raised the balled-up clothes with the other, aimed at the huanghuali coat rack, and threw it with all her might.

Shen Yuezhuang had plenty of strength and good aim. But the clothes were too light. They fluttered weakly in mid-air and fell to the floor.

However, although she hadn’t managed to throw the clothes away, she almost threw herself off the bed!

Kneeling on the edge of the bed, her posture was unstable. Her body tilted forward, maintaining that pose, and began to topple over. Liu Yun, as if this was routine, stretched out her arm to catch her by the shoulder. With a little force, she rolled Shen Yuezhuang onto her back in the bed.

“Drink it first. After you drink it, I have a few things to say to you.”

Shen Yuezhuang, as if she hadn’t heard, pulled the brocade quilt over her head and covered herself completely.

Her voice came through, muffled by the quilt.

“If you want to drink it, drink it yourself. I’m not listening!”

Liu Yun: “…”

Liu Yun took a deep breath, suppressing the rising anger in her chest. Her tone was as peaceful and gentle as possible. “Tomorrow is the day the candidate consorts formally enter the Palace. You need to move to the Phoenix Splendor Palace and live with them for three days. In those three days, ladies-in-waiting will teach you the rules. After that, you will take the preliminary examination.”

“Once the preliminary examination is over, you can go straight home. To show how important this preliminary exam is, the results will be announced on the same day as the Palace Examination results, alongside the top three candidates of the Imperial Examination. That will be at the beginning of next month. By then, His Majesty will also pick a position in the Ministry of Revenue for you.”

“What you need to do is first pass the preliminary exam in three days. Then, before the results are announced, convince your maternal grandfather. If Grand Preceptor Huo is willing to give in, the debt collection work afterwards will be much easier.”

“Before you leave the Palace tomorrow, I will give you a list. You should collect the debts in the order on the list. After you’ve handled this matter perfectly, you will…”

Liu Yun’s voice dropped lower. The words “you will” died on her lips.

Shen Yuezhuang poked her head out from under the quilt and turned to look at Liu Yun.

In the silent night, Liu Yun’s thin figure sat sideways on the edge of the bed. From Shen Yuezhuang’s angle, she could only see a blurry outline. The light from outside was too weak, and after passing through the trees and then the window, only a faint layer remained, gathering on that sharply defined profile—like a painting come to life from a beautiful woman scroll.

Desolate. Cold. Forlorn.

Shen Yuezhuang blinked. The faint scent of the calming incense around her made her yawn, and her eyes instantly grew moist, glistening.

She pressed, “I’ll do what?”

Liu Yun seemed to snap out of it. Her gaze shifted from the void in front of her. The moment she lowered her head, she gained a bit of worldly spirit, as if returning to the mortal realm.

She chuckled lightly. “If you drink this bowl of hangover soup, I’ll tell you.”

Shen Yuezhuang: “…”

In the end, Shen Yuezhuang snatched the bowl and took a gulp. It was both sour and spicy.

She forced it down. “Finished. Talk.”

Liu Yun looked at the remaining liquid in the bowl, still more than half full. Her gaze was resigned, but she didn’t say anything more.

In the dim night, that slender, jade-white hand held an equally white porcelain spoon. She beckoned to Shen Yuezhuang.

Shen Yuezhuang hesitated for a moment, then leaned in.

Liu Yun’s cool breath brushed against her ear and the side of her neck.

“After you handle this matter perfectly, you will… be free!”

She whispered the last few words, almost like a breath. Her tone carried a hint of emotion that Shen Yuezhuang couldn’t quite decipher.

Shen Yuezhuang pulled back a little, looking at Liu Yun with a suspicious expression.

She hadn’t entered the Palace as a consort, nor had she married. Although her father was pressuring her, that was still far off. Where was she unfree?

Not to mention having to do this thing first to be free. She was already free and easy!

In the darkness, only a faint flicker of light could be seen in Liu Yun’s eyes. In that flickering light, Shen Yuezhuang saw triumph. The sour and spicy taste was still strong in her mouth. Shen Yuezhuang slowly caught on. Her face immediately flushed with anger. She slammed the soup bowl onto the bedside cabinet.

With a bang, Shen Yuezhuang dove back under the covers with a great deal of noise.

She turned her back to the bed edge and said with barely concealed irritation, “Hasn’t Your Grace had enough to do during the day? It’s almost the fourth watch. Shouldn’t Your Grace be getting some rest?”

“Of course I have enough,” the other woman replied.

As if she couldn’t hear the dismissal in Shen Yuezhuang’s voice, Liu Yun’s expression relaxed. She silently added to herself, Once I’m done with my work, I naturally want to rest. But for me, sleeping isn’t the way to rest.

She turned her head and looked at the person bundled tightly in the bed. Her gaze was almost tangible, making Shen Yuezhuang’s back itch.

“Your Grace’s main hall is to the left when you go out!”

“No rush.” Liu Yun toyed with the spoon in her hand. “This Dowager heard from the palace maid that Miss was frightened today. I came to see for myself, to know just what in my Longevity Palace could still scare you.”

Liu Yun didn’t believe Ruixue’s account of “Miss Shen fell to the ground in fright.”

Shen Yuezhuang’s walking was known as “a single thunderclap on flat ground”—she could stumble with earth-shattering force even on level terrain, let alone over a threshold. Her falling down was the most ordinary thing in the world. Besides, she had never been afraid of anything.

Shen Yuezhuang didn’t believe in ghosts or spirits, so naturally she wasn’t afraid of them.

At eight years old, Shen Yuezhuang had dared to catch snakes with her bare hands. She kept scorpions as pets. She rode wild horses taller than herself…

For many years, Liu Yun had been trying to figure out if Shen Yuezhuang was unafraid of danger, or unafraid of dying.

But that question remained unanswered to this day. Of course, she also didn’t believe that an ordinary palace like this could hold anything worth fearing.

Liu Yun thought it was just Ruixue’s groundless speculation. She just didn’t want to leave yet. It had been six years, and she just wanted to rest a little longer.

But as soon as Liu Yun finished speaking, the atmosphere immediately froze.

Shen Yuezhuang opened her eyes, staring at the dark wall in front of her.

She remembered that afternoon, the rows of expressionless palace maids and eunuchs. And she remembered many years ago…

Liu Yun sensed something was wrong. She frowned and looked towards the bed. “What is it?”

It took a while for Shen Yuezhuang’s voice to emerge. She listened to her own dull heartbeat and said, “Back then, when Seventeen was no longer here, the Jade Hibiscus Palace was just like this. As soon as I walked in, I saw groups and groups of expressionless palace maids and eunuchs.”

The hint of a smile was still on the corners of Liu Yun’s mouth. But the leisurely light in her eyes immediately scattered. Her fingers, holding the spoon, tightened gradually. A cool, clear light added a touch of coldness to her gaze.

Seventeen. The Seventeenth Princess. Li Yunran.

Shen Yuezhuang had once been this princess’s Study Companion. Seventeen was a few months younger than Shen Yuezhuang. But she had a gentle temperament and had been sensible since childhood. She had been the Xuanwu Emperor’s beloved daughter. And because of that love, she had died in the Ningrong Rebellion back then. It wasn’t until the late Emperor ascended the throne that she was finally buried.

Shen Yuezhuang had once barged into the Palace in the middle of the night for her. Liu Yun hadn’t entered the Palace yet at that time. She only knew that Shen Yuezhuang had come back from the Palace in a daze and then fell gravely ill.

So, what she had seen back then was this…

~~~

Liu Yun left silently. Shen Yuezhuang didn’t know when she fell asleep either. The next morning, Cuizhu woke her up. Her mind was groggy. She sat up slowly, rubbing her eyes.

“Cuizhu,” she said, her speech also involuntarily slowing down. “Have you ever seen the sight of the fourth watch’s Emp…”

Before she could finish, Cuizhu rushed to find the head ornaments she needed to wear today, pulling her over to sit in front of the dressing mirror.

“Miss Shen, today is the big day when the candidate consorts enter the Palace. You have to report to the ladies-in-waiting. Don’t talk about the Empress Dowager of the fourth watch! If Miss is late, I don’t care what happens to me, but I’m afraid I won’t even live to see the noon sun today!”

Cuizhu didn’t know what had happened. Last night, she had slept unusually deeply. She was supposed to be keeping watch for Miss Shen, but she hadn’t even known when Miss came back.

The little girl was terrified. Her speech rate instantly surpassed their household’s number one “Crouching Dragon.”

Shen Yuezhuang closed her eyes and let Cuizhu fuss over her, slowly adding, “No, I mean, have you ever seen the Empress Dowager at the fourth watch?”

Cuizhu: “???????”

Satisfied, Shen Yuezhuang yawned, wiped the moisture from the corner of her eye, and caught a glimpse of the white bowl on the bedside table out of the corner of her eye. As if suddenly sober, she let out an abrupt laugh.

“She didn’t force-feed me the medicine. Huh, how strange!”

Cuizhu: “!!!!!!!”


The Empress Dowager Claims to Be My Ex-Girlfriend

The Empress Dowager Claims to Be My Ex-Girlfriend

太后自称是我前女友
Status: Completed Native Language: Chinese

Shen Yuezhuang, the Capital City’s number one female profligate.

Her great-grandfather, Shen Zhi, had at a young age, among a group of grubby little brats playing in mud and piss, singled out the boy who would later become the founding emperor, becoming his sworn brother.

Shen Yuezhuang, a descendant of nobility and meritorious officials, at the same age of muddling through, made two friends: a fox-like friend — the orphan Liu Yun, and a dog-like friend — the neglected Third Prince.

Ten years passed in the blink of an eye. The little prince of yesteryear had leaped to become the current Emperor, while the orphan girl with no family to rely on had become the current Empress Dowager. Only Shen Yuezhuang remained, the Capital’s number one aging leftover woman...

Tsk. The development of this affair was very suspicious. Her great-grandfather became sworn brothers with the Emperor, and he became a highly sought-after husband. How come, when it got to her, she turned into a hot potato?!

Later, Shen Yuezhuang heard a rumor coming from the Palace: the Empress Dowager had said that the young Miss of the Shen family was her old flame!

~~~

The new Emperor ascended the throne and ordered a Special Examination. Shen Yuezhuang, brimming with excitement, took her family’s servants to the Capital on the day the list was announced to try her hand at the tradition of Groom-Snatching Below the List. Her only requirement: good looks above all else!

And so, her burly servants brought her the current Empress Dowager, who was out of the Palace in disguise!

~~~

Speaking of the current Empress Dowager’s life, it was famously tumultuous. From a criminal slave to Empress Dowager, everyone said Emperor Jiande was her benefactor.

When Emperor Jiande ascended the throne and proclaimed a Great Amnesty, she was freed from her slave status.

When Emperor Jiande held his Imperial Consort Selection, she entered the Palace to await selection.

Before Emperor Jiande died, she had risen from a low-ranking Worthy Lady to the Empress of the Central Palace.

After Emperor Jiande’s death, when the Third Prince ascended the throne, she became the most powerful woman in the Palace: the Empress Dowager!

Rumors said the Empress Dowager was ruthless. Rumors said the Empress Dowager framed loyal officials. Rumors said the Empress Dowager was a woman usurping authority. Rumors said the Empress Dowager intended to usurp the throne...

Liu Yun turned a deaf ear to the rumors. But the one rumor she admitted to was that the Empress Dowager, unable to bear the jealousy of being a substitute bride, had secretly ruined all of Miss Shen’s marriage prospects.

Yes. She was alone and desolate within the Palace; how could she let Miss Shen enjoy a harmonious marriage outside?

***

Mini-Story:

Palace Attendant: Your Majesty, it’s terrible! Miss Shen and the Noble Consort are arguing in the Imperial Garden!

The Emperor, who was about to head to the Imperial Garden, immediately turned around: “Go fetch the Empress Dowager.”

Palace Attendant: “Then, Your Majesty...”

Emperor: “I’ll make myself scarce. She curses dirty.”

***

Mini-Story 2:

Miss Shen argued with a consort in the Palace, and the Empress Dowager punished her by ordering her to clean the Study Room. After an hour, the Empress Dowager’s personal female official looked at the still-wet ink stains and the messy bookshelves in the study, and sighed helplessly in persuasion, “Miss Shen, even if no one is watching, Her Highness has given the order. Could you at least pretend to do a good job?”

Shen Yuezhuang, with an incredulous look, pointed at the abacus on the table and retorted, “Pretend? Can’t you see this abacus is already neatly arranged?”

The female official was stunned. But the Empress Dowager looked completely unsurprised.

“If it’s sorted, it’s sorted. What do you want for dinner?”

Their germophobic Empress Dowager said this while closing the open book.

Female official: “...”

Your Highness, do you even see what you’re doing? Is this what you call “sorted”?!

Later, the training for new arrivals in the Empress Dowager’s Palace included memorizing a few special terms: that an abacus is also called a study, that soup with burst wontons is called “meat soup with sliced noodles,” and that the number “seventeen” is taboo in the Palace.

***

Reading Guide:

1. HE (Happy Ending), Both are pure, Sweet story. Feel free to read safely. 2. Silly and light-hearted. This one is absolutely not angsty (emphasis). ...

Content Tags: Palace and Nobility, Special Favor, Happy Enemies to Lovers, Sweet, Historical, Main Character is the Receiver

Search Keywords: Main Character: Shen Yuezhuang, Liu Yun │ Supporting Characters: │ Others:

One-Line Summary: The unspeakable affairs between the Empress Dowager and Miss Shen.

Theme: Strive hard, pursue a beautiful life.

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