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Chapter 8: Fire at the Phoenix Splendor Palace


The feud between Shen Yuezhuang and He Dan began when they were both Study Companions to the Seventeenth Princess during the Xuanwu Emperor’s reign.

It started at a palace banquet when they fought over a celadon bowl, crying and screaming. The Xuanwu Emperor thought to turn swords into plowshares, so he made both of them the princess’s Study Companions, hoping that over time, a sisterly bond would grow between them through their daily companionship.

Unfortunately, the two of them were probably innately incompatible. He Dan had many siblings at home; as the eldest daughter, she was usually generous and didn’t fuss over small matters. Shen Yuezhuang was also carefree and oblivious. But whenever the two of them met, they would always quarrel over trivial things.

Today, the princess gave you a hairpin with one more pearl. Tomorrow, the princess gave me a more exquisitely patterned pastry. Today, the princess said an extra word to you. Tomorrow, the princess rejected my opinion…

Over time, it was impossible to tell who owed whom more, or who had started it. They just started fighting on sight, without even needing a reason. Any old grievance from the past ten-plus years was enough to make the two of them see red.

Their mutual animosity was an open secret in the Capital’s circle of noble ladies. Whenever someone hosted a banquet, they would take care to separate the two of them. Who would have thought that, at today’s selection, not only did they inevitably run into each other, but they were also, of all the rotten luck, assigned to the same room!

Shen Yuezhuang certainly didn’t want to share a room with He Dan. She deliberately waited until He Dan had been gone for a long time before going with Pei Shangyu to register. But the palace lady in charge said there had been a mistake in the room assignments. For those who hadn’t registered yet, lodgings would be decided by drawing lots.

In the end, Shen Yuezhuang not only failed to share a room with Pei Shangyu, but also had the double misfortune of having to live under the same roof as He Dan!

Putting these two in the same room, it was obvious things wouldn’t be peaceful.

When Liu Yun got the news, she ordered the lady-in-waiting in charge of lessons to find some excuse to separate the two of them during class the next day.

But no one expected that, on the very first night the candidate consorts entered the Palace, something would happen.

In the dead of night, with all sounds silent, hurried footsteps in the Longevity Palace woke the person on the bed.

Ruixue came in, looking flustered. “Your Grace, a report from the servants. A fire has broken out in the side hall of the Phoenix Splendor Palace.”

Liu Yun woke with a start. “Is everyone alright? How did it start?”

“Everyone is fine. As for the cause of the fire… according to the secret guards, Miss Shen was performing an exorcism to catch a ghost.”

Liu Yun, who had hoped for at least one peaceful night: “…”

I really believed her ghost!

~~~

In the side hall of the Phoenix Splendor Palace, there were many pieces of broken porcelain on the floor.

The eight-immortals table, which had been in the center of the room, had burned to ashes. The door frame was fine, but the bed curtains and beddings were reduced to half their length, wet and black, piled on the floor.

That was where the eight-immortals table had been. Now it was the table’s grave. Four people stood around the “grave.”

All four were only in their undergarments. The one on the far end, He Dan, had a dark expression. A crushed piece of danshen lay by her feet.

She glared at Shen Yuezhuang with a menacing look.

Shen Yuezhuang’s collar and hair were still dripping wet. She glared back defiantly. Pei Shangyu, beside her, took an outer robe from a palace maid and draped it over Shen Yuezhuang.

“It’s cold at night. Be careful not to catch a cold.”

Pei Shangyu moved a few steps to stand between them, blocking their crackling eye contact. She then looked up at the other candidate consort in the room.

That candidate consort was from Youzhou. Her name was Gu Qingzhi. She was the youngest among this year’s candidates.

Right now, her snow-white undergarments were stained with large patches of ink. Her palms and cheeks were also smudged. She looked completely disheveled. Her almond eyes were brimming with tears, and her fingertips were lightly twisting a handkerchief, as if she was about to cry.

She was young and timid. Seeing that the matter had escalated to this point, she was trembling all over.

Pei Shangyu was about to say something to comfort her when she heard the eunuch outside announce, “Her Grace the Empress Dowager has arrived!”

Before Pei Shangyu could react, He Dan behind her had already stepped forward in two or three paces.

She pushed past Pei Shangyu and grabbed Shen Yuezhuang’s similarly wet sleeve. Lowering her voice, she said, “The weather is dry. A candle knocked over the bed curtain. An accidental fire. Got it?”

“Accidental?” Shen Yuezhuang snorted. Her gaze swept across the mess in the room. “Would you believe that if you were in their shoes?”

He Dan’s voice was harsh. “Whether they believe it or not, that’s what we say!”

He Dan valued her own reputation. But Shen Yuezhuang couldn’t care less.

She smiled nonchalantly. “Afraid word will get out that you secretly brought alcohol into the Palace? The model of capital city’s noble ladies. Last year’s top of the beauty rankings?”

“It’s medicinal wine for sleep!” He Dan was furious, veins faintly visible on her forehead. But she quickly calmed down.

Pei Shangyu and Gu Qingzhi had already gone out to greet the Empress Dowager. The door was open. The two of them were a few steps behind, walking out.

They both stepped over the threshold together. The crescent moon in the sky was bright. A dark crowd of people was kneeling on the ground, all there to watch the excitement.

The courtyard, which had been lively until the Empress Dowager’s arrival, now only had the sound of chirping night insects, as still as if no one were there.

The phoenix-embroidered, bright yellow robe descended from the palanquin in front of everyone. The overwhelming imperial prestige made everyone dare not raise their heads.

Shen Yuezhuang knelt down along with He Dan.

He Dan steadied her voice and said, “There was no ghost catching tonight. Nor was there any alcohol I brought into the Palace. This fire was an accident. As long as we stick to that story, no one will lose face. Got it?”

Shen Yuezhuang kept her head down, as if she couldn’t feel the anger radiating from the Empress Dowager’s arrival. She lowered her voice even more.

“It’s okay. I’m good at losing face.”

He Dan: “…”

Shen Yuezhuang knew she had He Dan by the short hairs, not wanting to ruin her own reputation. Her tone was full of eagerness to kick someone while they were down.

He Dan’s brow twitched violently at her shameless attitude—the attitude of “lice don’t itch if you have enough of them, and you don’t worry about debt if you have enough”—and at the suggestive look on her face.

He Dan took a deep breath.

Clenching her teeth, she squeezed out a few words one by one. “…I’ll concede this one time.”

“Mm… fine!”

Shen Yuezhuang replied reluctantly, but the smugness in her voice was unmistakable. She didn’t even notice the resplendent robe had arrived in front of her.

Liu Yun had seen her wearing an outer robe that was clearly not her own, a blue one, at the palace gate. And now she saw her huddled next to He Dan, whispering about who knows what, looking as pleased as if her tail were wagging in the air!

Liu Yun’s footsteps gained more anger. But as soon as she entered the room, she halted abruptly.

The scene before her was truly indescribable. A thick, strange smell of ink, a faint scent of sandalwood, a deformed censer that had been knocked over, an unknown substance that looked like Chinese medicine, and torn bed curtains.

A crack. And the fragments of some other unknown implement.

A mess of bits and pieces all over the floor. There wasn’t even a place to step!

She had never seen a fire produce such a rich variety of debris!

The four people at the door could all hear the very subtle speechlessness contained in that footstep.

The Empress Dowager quickly came out again.

“Come to the main hall to explain yourselves!”


The Empress Dowager Claims to Be My Ex-Girlfriend

The Empress Dowager Claims to Be My Ex-Girlfriend

太后自称是我前女友
Status: Completed Native Language: Chinese

Shen Yuezhuang, the Capital City’s number one female profligate.

Her great-grandfather, Shen Zhi, had at a young age, among a group of grubby little brats playing in mud and piss, singled out the boy who would later become the founding emperor, becoming his sworn brother.

Shen Yuezhuang, a descendant of nobility and meritorious officials, at the same age of muddling through, made two friends: a fox-like friend — the orphan Liu Yun, and a dog-like friend — the neglected Third Prince.

Ten years passed in the blink of an eye. The little prince of yesteryear had leaped to become the current Emperor, while the orphan girl with no family to rely on had become the current Empress Dowager. Only Shen Yuezhuang remained, the Capital’s number one aging leftover woman...

Tsk. The development of this affair was very suspicious. Her great-grandfather became sworn brothers with the Emperor, and he became a highly sought-after husband. How come, when it got to her, she turned into a hot potato?!

Later, Shen Yuezhuang heard a rumor coming from the Palace: the Empress Dowager had said that the young Miss of the Shen family was her old flame!

~~~

The new Emperor ascended the throne and ordered a Special Examination. Shen Yuezhuang, brimming with excitement, took her family’s servants to the Capital on the day the list was announced to try her hand at the tradition of Groom-Snatching Below the List. Her only requirement: good looks above all else!

And so, her burly servants brought her the current Empress Dowager, who was out of the Palace in disguise!

~~~

Speaking of the current Empress Dowager’s life, it was famously tumultuous. From a criminal slave to Empress Dowager, everyone said Emperor Jiande was her benefactor.

When Emperor Jiande ascended the throne and proclaimed a Great Amnesty, she was freed from her slave status.

When Emperor Jiande held his Imperial Consort Selection, she entered the Palace to await selection.

Before Emperor Jiande died, she had risen from a low-ranking Worthy Lady to the Empress of the Central Palace.

After Emperor Jiande’s death, when the Third Prince ascended the throne, she became the most powerful woman in the Palace: the Empress Dowager!

Rumors said the Empress Dowager was ruthless. Rumors said the Empress Dowager framed loyal officials. Rumors said the Empress Dowager was a woman usurping authority. Rumors said the Empress Dowager intended to usurp the throne...

Liu Yun turned a deaf ear to the rumors. But the one rumor she admitted to was that the Empress Dowager, unable to bear the jealousy of being a substitute bride, had secretly ruined all of Miss Shen’s marriage prospects.

Yes. She was alone and desolate within the Palace; how could she let Miss Shen enjoy a harmonious marriage outside?

***

Mini-Story:

Palace Attendant: Your Majesty, it’s terrible! Miss Shen and the Noble Consort are arguing in the Imperial Garden!

The Emperor, who was about to head to the Imperial Garden, immediately turned around: “Go fetch the Empress Dowager.”

Palace Attendant: “Then, Your Majesty...”

Emperor: “I’ll make myself scarce. She curses dirty.”

***

Mini-Story 2:

Miss Shen argued with a consort in the Palace, and the Empress Dowager punished her by ordering her to clean the Study Room. After an hour, the Empress Dowager’s personal female official looked at the still-wet ink stains and the messy bookshelves in the study, and sighed helplessly in persuasion, “Miss Shen, even if no one is watching, Her Highness has given the order. Could you at least pretend to do a good job?”

Shen Yuezhuang, with an incredulous look, pointed at the abacus on the table and retorted, “Pretend? Can’t you see this abacus is already neatly arranged?”

The female official was stunned. But the Empress Dowager looked completely unsurprised.

“If it’s sorted, it’s sorted. What do you want for dinner?”

Their germophobic Empress Dowager said this while closing the open book.

Female official: “...”

Your Highness, do you even see what you’re doing? Is this what you call “sorted”?!

Later, the training for new arrivals in the Empress Dowager’s Palace included memorizing a few special terms: that an abacus is also called a study, that soup with burst wontons is called “meat soup with sliced noodles,” and that the number “seventeen” is taboo in the Palace.

***

Reading Guide:

1. HE (Happy Ending), Both are pure, Sweet story. Feel free to read safely. 2. Silly and light-hearted. This one is absolutely not angsty (emphasis). ...

Content Tags: Palace and Nobility, Special Favor, Happy Enemies to Lovers, Sweet, Historical, Main Character is the Receiver

Search Keywords: Main Character: Shen Yuezhuang, Liu Yun │ Supporting Characters: │ Others:

One-Line Summary: The unspeakable affairs between the Empress Dowager and Miss Shen.

Theme: Strive hard, pursue a beautiful life.

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