The Kindhearted Girl Gets a Wife 36

Chapter 36

The sunset melted like gold across the sky. Pei Yunle felt a layer of orange-red heat on her eyelids. She sat up from the bed, covered in sweat.

The sleep she had been lacking was finally made up for. She sat in the utter loneliness and shook her head.

Suddenly, the sound of a page turning brushed past her ear. Pei Yunle looked up and saw Lin Zilan sitting in the dark. The only remaining sunlight from the table shone on the medical book, revealing a dense patch of black words.

“Mom?” Pei Yunle felt like she had been caught slacking off. This subtle fear seeped out from the depths of her bones. She shivered in the twilight.

Lin Zilan flipped through the 600-plus-page book and finally closed the cover. Her finger, with a gold ring on it, tapped the table intermittently.

“You’ve been asleep for about three or four hours? In that time, I went out for a walk around Pingshun twice. The changes here are huge. I almost couldn’t recognize where the newly built roads lead. If it weren’t for this river to tell the direction, I probably would have gotten lost.”

With that, she leaned back in her chair, her left leg naturally resting on her right.

“But, the people here haven’t changed much. Other than getting older, they’re still very recognizable. So I went and asked around about what you’ve been doing here all this time.”

“As expected, your temper hasn’t changed at all. What’s unexpected is that you’ve actually started to make money, although…”

Lin Zilan’s words suddenly stopped. She frowned, and a few wrinkles appeared on her forehead, as if she were in a difficult position.

“Although it was very reckless and naive, it’s still a progress.” She finally decided to give her daughter a more pleasant adjective.

Pei Yunle was not used to this way of speaking. When she had done something wrong as a child, Lin Zilan would not be so calm. To save time, she would always adopt a relatively violent but very effective method. So the lighter her words were, the heavier the stone on Pei Yunle’s heart felt.

“I’m a little curious. Why are you making money? Plus, you called me before and wanted me to lend you money. I couldn’t figure out the twists and turns at first. After all, although I didn’t give you much extra money, it wasn’t so much that you would be so anxious.”

“Until I came to Pingshun today and chatted with Grandma for a while, I finally understood. You’re probably trying to raise money for medical expenses, right?”

Pei Yunle stood in the soft light, her tall figure looking so humble. Her lips were pursed into a straight line, showing a bit of stubbornness.

“Speak!”

In the solemn and oppressive environment, Pei Yunle had no ability to be clever. “Yes. I don’t think I’m wrong.”

“I’m not saying you’re wrong. Can you tell me why you’re raising twenty thousand yuan for someone with no blood relationship?”

“I just think that Grandma is a good person.”

The unfounded answer left Lin Zilan speechless. “There are many good people in the hospital. Do you want to do charity directly?”

“I gave birth to you. Can you not treat me like a fool?”

Pei Yunle didn’t want to say any more, but she didn’t dare to just slam the door and leave.

“Actually, your thoughts are really easy to guess. Combining the clues, you’re actually doing it for Chen Qingtang, right?”

At the mention of the key point, Pei Yunle’s lips trembled. She couldn’t refuse, and she didn’t dare to admit it, afraid that Lin Zilan would vent her anger on Chen Qingtang.

“I don’t like to talk about all the problems at once. I came up to find you just to clarify two things. One is to seek the truth, and the other is to talk to you about your personality.”

“Go, go and get a stool from outside and sit opposite me.”

Pei Yunle nodded and slowly went downstairs at a snail’s pace. She brought up a slightly taller stool, and the two of them sat face to face.

“Actually, during this time, I’ve been reflecting on my parenting style and the consequences it has had on your personality. I used to sacrifice a lot of time to make money. I wanted you to have a good life and not have to worry about money. So as long as you asked for something, as long as it was within a reasonable range, I would definitely give it to you. Maybe it’s because you haven’t experienced the hardships of life. You have a little bit of cleverness, but your mind is like a child’s.”

“During the holidays, I would give you money to travel and play with things you like. You may have gained some knowledge, but your vision is still very short-sighted. I went to that clinic and I know why you resigned.”

“I said, the things that haven’t changed about you here are your temper and your character. You know to sell some new things for Chen Qingtang’s store, but why didn’t you think about your career plan in the clinic?”

Pei Yunle’s fingers gripped the edge of the stool, her knuckles turning white from the force. She could tolerate Lin Zilan’s direct anger, but this was the first time she had been dissected like this. There were warm tears in her eyes. She felt like she was being slowly roasted on a fire. The other person was going to list all her shortcomings. Even if it was her own mother, this shame and self-esteem were pulling at her uncomfortably.

“You say you’re making money. Have you made any? Maybe, but I can’t see it, and I don’t think you can. I don’t know what to do with you now. You’ve been at home since you graduated, and you haven’t entered the real society at all. Your mind is half mature and half childish. How on earth does Chen Qingtang put up with you?”

At the last sentence, Pei Yunle’s tears instantly hit the concrete floor.

“You’ve raised yourself very badly. I’m a big part of it.” Lin Zilan rubbed her somewhat dry eyes, which were bloodshot. The night she heard that Pei Yunle had been bitten by a snake, she had stayed up all night without rest. Every time she closed her eyes, she was filled with shame, hating herself for not being a good mother.

“As for the twenty thousand yuan, I’ll pay for it. I’m not being a good person. I just don’t want you to continue to be tormented by this matter. Besides, Grandma Liu is indeed a good person. She helped me a lot when I was young. So this money is not out of kindness, but simply because I think she deserves it. And also because I feel sorry for you.”

Pei Yunle hugged her knees, her tears soaking her pants, leaving a large dark patch.

“Oh right, I suddenly thought, what are your plans with Chen Qingtang in the future?”

At her words, Pei Yunle lifted her head. Her eyelids were red, and she was crying with snot bubbles. She had only been busy raising money for medical expenses recently. The only future she wanted was to find a job in Pingshun. Not to make money, but just to not be a burden to Chen Qingtang and be able to support herself.

“I’m thinking.” The two words came out of her nose. This was indeed the truth.

“You’re thinking? I told you you’re really young. You don’t consider the future at all. Being with her means you have to stay in Pingshun. After all, she can’t possibly abandon the old person and run around with you. If you want to stay here, then your employment opportunities will be very narrow, and you’ll have to give up a lot of things. If you want to go back to Anyang, then you and Chen Qingtang will be in a long-distance relationship. It will be very tiring for you to travel back and forth. Sooner or later, one of you will not be able to take it.”

“Have you thought about it?” Lin Zilan saw that she couldn’t even fart, so she had to ask her again, afraid that she was so dizzy from crying.

“I know…”

“And then?”

Then there was a long silence. Pei Yunle was really thinking about this problem. She suddenly thought of a famous water course in college—career planning. It was there every semester, but no one would really listen. Most of them only started planning when they were about to graduate. But Pei Yunle herself was resistant to it. Until a year after graduation, she hadn’t done anything, so much so that Lin Zilan couldn’t bear it anymore and threw her here.

Everything was back to square one.

Only then did Pei Yunle surprisingly discover a fact. It turned out that everything was just going in circles. She hadn’t solved the problem of her job. Even if this matter was postponed, even if she deliberately concealed it, at some point, it would still appear, until she completely eliminated it.

Lin Zilan propped her chin on her hand, her index finger stroking her hairline. She sighed at the sunset that was about to sink into the distant mountains.

“When will you grow up? Why are you always taking the wrong path? I’ve spent so many resources on you, not for you to come here and suffer for someone.”

“Of course, this has a lot to do with you yourself. But no matter what, Chen Qingtang has brought you a lot of—”

Lin Zilan drew out the last of her words. She had already tried her best to control her emotions to avoid saying anything unpleasant.

But the blunter the blade, the more it tortures when it cuts.

“Trouble.”

“Of course, you are also a burden to Chen Qingtang. An immature character, with no strength or ability. You like this cannot be Chen Qingtang’s harbor. And Chen Qingtang herself also has certain shortcomings. It’s already very difficult to be independent. She has to tolerate you and provide emotional support. How can the two of you rely on each other? In other words, do you really dare to lean on each other’s shoulders?”

At this point, Lin Zilan didn’t know who was reaching for whom. She had never used a person’s family background as a standard to judge them. Compared to amniotic fluid, she valued personal independence more.

“You are a burden to her, and she is a burden to you. I really can’t figure out how you two can persist in such a relationship?”

Lin Zilan continued to tap the table. “Go home, Yunle. I really don’t want to continue to see your increasingly thin face. In fact, you are also very scared about your future, right?”

Pei Yunle’s throat bobbed. She felt that her tears were no longer just in her eyes, but had already spread upwards and swallowed her brain. Her whole body was like being in a hot spring, with no agility or reaction.

A mother knew her daughter’s personality too well, so much so that Lin Zilan’s words were like pearls.

Since the two of them had been together, Pei Yunle could indeed feel the sword of Damocles hanging over her head. At first, it was because of family and worldly matters, and then it was the money needed to survive.

A person can only be crushed by poverty.

Pei Yunle could spend money and make promises, but she lacked the real ability to make money and the endurance. But this was fatal for Chen Qingtang, who was in urgent need of this. She didn’t need a lover who was all talk and no action.

The outside was beautifully decorated, but the inside was empty.

As she slowly became aware of these things, she would have insomnia, worry, and a loss of appetite. So she had rarely had a really good night’s sleep.

Pei Yunle wiped away a tear. The liquid flowed on her fingertips, giving her a slippery feeling.

She looked at her wet fingers. All she could do was cry.

“Was that too cruel? I didn’t want to say these things, but I found that it’s not possible if I don’t make it clear. You can’t live in a dream you’ve woven yourself forever. You’re the only one who’s still deceiving yourself.”

Lin Zilan took out a small paper bag from her bag, took out a few thick stacks of paper, and stuffed them into Pei Yunle’s fingers.

“Do you want to go home?”

Her mother asked her this question again.

Pei Yunle knew that as long as she nodded, everything would be restored by Lin Zilan. She would still be the rich girl who liked to play small tricks, be glib, and do whatever she wanted, and she would use her mother’s money with a clear conscience. Even if she didn’t get into the city hospital, Lin Zilan would definitely find a way to find her a decent job.

But this kind of life would ruin a person with healthy limbs, and gradually hollow out a person’s ability to be independent. For example, her at this moment, her life of more than twenty years had already shown this.

Pei Yunle looked at the ground with her red and swollen eyelids. In retrospect, she was only in her twenties. She could learn anything quickly. She was in her prime. As long as she was willing, it was not too late for anything.

She would rather break her limbs and reshape them than be a puppet on a string.

She would rather be in pain than be numb.

Pei Yunle, who had lived for half her life, finally understood this.