The Little Duck 40

Chapter 40

Did the broken thing, even if repaired, not know when it would break again…

It was as if to say that even if a broken mirror was mended, there would still be cracks.

Jian Xin couldn’t help but think that perhaps in the past many years, they had indeed both let go of each other and moved on with their respective lives.

The watch she had given Yan Lu was broken, and Yan Lu had never had it repaired. The keyboard Yan Lu had given her was broken, and she had never had it repaired either.

What did it matter if it was repaired or not? No one would be unable to live without one thing.

In the years they had been apart, Yan Lu had been doing better and better, and she hadn’t been doing too badly either—at least she was at the level of an ordinary person.

The two of them, neither of them could not live without the other…

So, a broken gift didn’t need to be repaired, and people who had separated didn’t have to meet again.

That was the logic, and that was the fact, but why… she always felt that it shouldn’t be like this between them.

The little duck had been curled up in the corner of the sofa for a long time. It wasn’t until its owner put on her slippers and stood up from the sofa that it came back to its senses and twisted its neck to look at her.

Yan Lu also seemed to feel the little duck’s gaze. She looked back and said softly, “Cauliflower should go to bed early.”

After that, she turned and walked towards the bathroom.

Jian Xin was taken aback for a moment, then suddenly stood up from the floor, flapped her wings a few times, and pattered over to Yan Lu’s feet. Finally, she stood firm, and like a little teacher, with her wings behind her back and her body straight, she slowly followed behind Yan Lu.

She really wanted to tell Yan Lu that she couldn’t be so pessimistic.

What’s wrong with a crack in a mended mirror? In her third year of high school, the first time she got a smartphone, just a few days after she got it, she had dropped it and a “bang” had appeared on the screen, but she had still used it for almost three years, right?

What’s wrong with a broken thing breaking again after it’s been repaired? As if something that has never been broken will never break!

You can’t just not touch something because you’re afraid it will break, right?

Jian Xin knew that Yan Lu wouldn’t be able to understand anything she said now, but she just felt uncomfortable if she didn’t say something—after all, when they were face to face, Yan Lu would hide everything in her heart and wouldn’t even touch on topics she didn’t want to talk about. No matter how she twisted and turned, she might not be able to lead the conversation to such a place!

“Quack quack quack, quack quack quack ahh—ong?”

Just as Jian Xin was craning her neck and quacking, the person in front of her suddenly took off her pajamas, kicked off her slippers, and walked barefoot to her side, bending down to pick her up.

The little duck’s beak opened wider and wider, its gaze almost dazed as it looked at the scene in front of it. Before it could even react to what was happening, it had been gently tossed out of the bathroom by Yan Lu.

The bathroom door closed with a soft “click.” Jian Xin habitually flapped her wings and landed steadily, tilting her head in a daze for a while.

The sound of water came from the bathroom. She unconsciously shook her feathers and suddenly came back to her senses.

Jian Xin: “…”

Why did she just take them off without a word?

And if she was going to take them off, fine, but she even crouched down to pick her up, as if she was afraid someone wouldn’t see clearly…

“Uh-huh—” This is too familiar!

Yan Lu’s figure seemed to be even better than before…

But it wasn’t the same as before. She could see but not touch. Wasn’t this just making her uncomfortable?

Jian Xin took several deep breaths in a row. She felt that her mind was full of strange things. She quickly jumped up and down to shake her head, then turned and scurried back to the study.

Xin Xin’s sleeping posture was very domineering, and at this moment, it had already occupied the entire duck nest.

Hmph, even you want me to see but not sleep, right!

This is intolerable!

Jian Xin raised her wing and slapped Xin Xin’s butt.

One slap didn’t wake it up, so she added two more. Seeing it move slightly, she then pecked its forehead a couple of times with her beak.

Xin Xin finally cracked open its eyes. Besides fatigue, there was also disgust in its eyes.

The little duck immediately puffed out its chest and flapped its wings.

“Quack! Quack ahh—” You, hurry up and make some space for me!

As if it could really understand, Xin Xin twisted its butt, arched its back, and tucked in its fluffy belly, making a little bit of space for the little duck.

Just a little bit, no more.

In the dog’s eyes, this little one only took up that much space. Giving it more would be a waste.

Jian Xin was already used to this. She stepped into the small space in front of the dog’s belly.

Just as she had settled down, her head was patted by a small paw.

“Quack!” Little naughty dog, I was good to you for nothing this afternoon!

The little naughty dog grunted and went back to sleep.

Jian Xin couldn’t be bothered to argue with this little dog. Mainly, she wouldn’t have the upper hand if they really fought, so she didn’t fight back and just curled up her small body.

Yan Lu finished her shower, put on her pajamas, and came out of the bathroom. Before she went back to her bedroom, she turned off the lights in the study.

The entire room was instantly dark.

Jian Xin couldn’t help but sigh. She tried hard to clear her mind of distracting thoughts, but she couldn’t help but think of that faded old watch.

She still remembered that the night she had given this watch to Yan Lu, it was snowing lightly. Nanjiang, which rarely snowed, was covered in a thin layer of white—she had run away from home with Yan Lu.

Without the constraints of their families, they had wandered through the lively night market, feeling an unprecedented freedom.

She didn’t have much money on her, just the allowance she had saved up bit by bit.

On that street, there were many beautiful and fun little trinkets. She had liked many of them but was reluctant to buy them. In the end, she had only chosen this watch and put it on Yan Lu’s hand.

It was just a thirty-something yuan thing. The quality was not good, and it faded very quickly. She hadn’t seen Yan Lu wear it in university.

If she had to count, she had given Yan Lu many gifts back then. A watch that was so cheap, she wouldn’t have felt anything if it had been lost at any time.

But so many years had passed, and Yan Lu still kept it by her side.

—Saying “what’s broken is broken,” but she was still reluctant to throw away the things from the past.

She refused to believe that there was really no future between them.

They still had so many promises that they hadn’t had time to fulfill…

*

“…What are we going to do in the future?”

Yan Lu poked her little head out from behind the wall and looked at the bubble tea shop where she usually worked from a distance.

Two unfamiliar faces were standing at the entrance of the bubble tea shop. Jian Xin said that they were her aunt and cousin—her mom had probably mobilized all her relatives to look for them.

Jian Xin gently pulled her back and said softly, “Let’s go first, don’t be seen.”

She said, then took Yan Lu’s wrist and led her away without looking back.

Jian Xin didn’t want to come to this vicinity at all.

It was too close to home, and she was really afraid that she would accidentally run into a familiar face and then be chased by a bunch of people.

She was a music student, not a sports student. Her stamina was not that good.

If she was really caught, she would probably be dragged back.

But although she didn’t want to come, she couldn’t resist Yan Lu’s strong desire to come and take a look.

Yan Lu always felt that the bubble tea shop’s schedule was arranged in advance. If she just skipped work without a word, the shop would inevitably have some temporary problems.

The owner of the bubble tea shop had always been very good to her. She thought that even if she wasn’t going to work anymore, she should at least tell them, so as not to delay their business.

But in fact, she didn’t need to say these things at all.

Jian Xin’s relatives had been waiting here since before dawn. The owner of the bubble tea shop would have had a hard time not knowing that she wouldn’t be coming for the next few days.

“Where are we going?” Yan Lu asked again, chasing after Jian Xin.

“I don’t know. Let’s just hide for now. It’ll be fine once your dad is gone.”

“Will he leave…”

“He will!” Jian Xin’s tone was very certain. “Didn’t you say he’s a drunkard who loves to gamble? How much money can he have? How long can he stay here?”

“…” Yan Lu lowered her eyes, lost in thought.

“When he runs out of money and can’t live, he’ll naturally have to go back,” Jian Xin said, her fingers tightening slightly on Yan Lu’s wrist, comforting her, “Don’t worry, we can go home then!”

“Will your aunt and uncle still take me in…”

“What are you talking about?” Jian Xin frowned, her tone suddenly becoming much more serious. “If they want me, they have to want you! Otherwise, they can just not want either of us!”

Yan Lu pressed her lips together tightly, her voice as small as a mosquito’s buzz. “Even if he leaves this time, when school starts, he’ll still find the school…”

Jian Xin suddenly stopped and turned to look at Yan Lu.

Being looked at like this, Yan Lu was so scared that she didn’t even dare to blink. Her small mouth was slightly open, and she just stared back at her blankly.

“Yan Xiaolu, oh Yan Xiaolu, when can you ever think on the bright side?” Jian Xin said, her hands on her hips, as if she were a little angry. “Does imagining the worst possible outcome for everything make your life any smoother?”

“I…”

“You still have me! We can just take it one step at a time. Isn’t thinking about all the bad things just scaring yourself? Maybe the things you’re worried about won’t even happen?” For a moment, Jian Xin was as serious as a little teacher, her words full of meaning. “There’s a saying—a boat will naturally straighten itself at the bridgehead, and nothing is a big deal except life and death!”

“It’s… a car will find its way when it reaches the mountain, and a boat will naturally straighten itself at the bridgehead,” Yan Lu corrected softly.

Jian Xin waved her hand. “Don’t be so strict. The meaning is the same, as long as it rhymes!”

Yan Lu’s eyes blinked. She didn’t say anything, just silently thought to herself—the meaning of these two sentences is actually not the same.

Jian Xin shrank her neck and walked ahead.

Whether she was bored or felt that it was too cold outside, she would go into any shop she saw.

If it were any other day, if she saw something she liked, as long as she could afford it, Jian Xin would have bought it.

But now, to last a little longer outside, she was actually very strict with her hands, a firm “look but don’t buy”—no matter how much her heart itched, she couldn’t buy it!

Yan Lu followed closely behind her, watching her “wow” at many things, and then just leave them and turn away. She couldn’t help but silently make a decision in her heart.

—When she could earn more money in the future, whatever Jian Xin liked, no matter how expensive, she would buy it for her.

On the second day of their runaway, they were still wandering aimlessly on the streets.

The snow had stopped, and the melting snow was even colder than when it was snowing, but they held hands, occasionally tucking them into each other’s pockets, and then they felt that the weather was not so cold after all.

A little after eleven in the morning, their stomachs, which had not had breakfast, were hungry. They happened to see a douhua noodle shop and immediately went in and ordered two large, hot bowls.

After lunch, their stomachs were full, and they were a little too full to walk. So they went to a nearby Dicos and sat down.

But just sitting there without eating made them feel a little guilty.

To avoid being kicked out, they symbolically ordered a portion of fries and sat down by the window, half-slumped, and chatted.

In their idle chatter, they talked about a lot of random things.

As they chatted, Jian Xin even laughingly brought up her winter break homework.

—That’s right, she hadn’t touched a single word of it.

With school starting in just a few days, not only had she not touched a single word of it, but she also had no way to rush it, because she hadn’t brought it with her when she had left last night.

“If only I had brought my homework, I could be doing some of it now…”

Jian Xin muttered softly, lying on the table.

The next second, as if realizing something, she couldn’t help but sit up straight, slap the table, and curse herself with a speechless expression, “I’m really impressed with myself! Who would bring their winter break homework when they’re running away from home? Don’t be so in love with studying!”

After cursing, she seemed to savor it for a moment, then suddenly laughed for no reason.

Yan Lu, who was listening to this schizophrenic self-criticism on the side, couldn’t help but laugh along with her.

And so they laughed, not knowing what was so funny, but they just kept laughing like geese.

Until they were tired of laughing, Jian Xin leaned back and let out a long sigh of relief.

Yan Lu stood up and sat down next to her from across the table. She still preferred to sit next to Jian Xin.

Jian Xin seemed to have struggled for a while, then finally took out her phone from her bag.

It had been off for a long time. She didn’t need to turn it on to know that it was full of missed calls and text messages from her family.

Yan Lu pursed her lips, a little afraid of Jian Xin turning it on, but she also felt that Jian Xin should turn it on.

Her child had run away from home. A night and a morning had passed, and there was no news at all. Her aunt and uncle must be worried sick.

Yan Lu: “Turn it on and take a look…”

Jian Xin nodded, took a deep breath, and turned her phone back on.

The moment it turned on, there was an endless list of missed calls and a lot of text messages from various times.

Jian Xin casually clicked on a few of the more recent ones.

—Xin Xin, come back, let’s talk properly.

—Jian Xin! No matter where you are, you should at least reply to your family!

—Can you reply when you see this?

—Xin Xin, are you and Xiao Lu okay?

—Did you eat last night, where did you spend the night, did you sleep well?

—Xin Xin, if you don’t reply, Mom is really going to call the police!

Jian Xin’s nose tingled, and she quickly sent a text message back.

—Dad, Mom, Yan Lu and I are fine. We have money on us, a place to stay at night, and we’re eating on time. Don’t worry, and don’t call the police. We’ll take care of ourselves. I’ll report our safety to you every day. When that bad person is gone, I’ll bring Yan Lu back to apologize to you. You can hit me and scold me however you want then.

After sending the message, Jian Xin turned off her phone again.

“I’m sorry,” Yan Lu lowered her head.

“What are you sorry for?”

“I’ve implicated you.”

“It’s not implication when it’s voluntary…” Jian Xin said softly, unconsciously clenching her fists. “It’s just that I can’t help you more… Besides running away, I can’t think of a better way.”

Yan Lu opened her mouth, as if to say something, but Jian Xin continued before she could.

“But it’s fine, we’re still young… When we grow up, these things won’t be able to stop us!” she said, looking at Yan Lu, her eyes curving with a smile. “When we grow up, we can earn a lot of money, go wherever we want, live wherever we want, and we won’t have to worry about being caught by anyone!”

“Isn’t that still running away?”

“It’s different!” Jian Xin wanted to explain, but her mouth was open, and she found that she couldn’t say how it was different.

After a long moment of hesitation, she pouted and said stubbornly, “It’s just different!”

Yan Lu gazed at her for a long time, then laughed softly.

“When I earn money, can I support you?” she said softly, almost as if on a whim, the words just slipping out.

“Hmm?” Jian Xin came back to her senses and looked into Yan Lu’s eyes. “What do you mean, are you saying I can live off you in the future?”

“You can also not eat,” Yan Lu said, lowering her head again to avoid her gaze.

I must be crazy, she thought, to have said such things.

Where is her future? She can’t see it at all…

“I have great ambitions. I won’t live off anyone else!” Jian Xin said, tilting her head to look at Yan Lu’s expression.

It wasn’t a hallucination. She saw Yan Lu frown slightly, and she couldn’t help but lift the corners of her mouth. “But, if it’s Yan Xiaolu’s, I’m still willing to eat a little!”

Yan Lu secretly glanced at Jian Xin, her eyes clearly filled with an unbelievable joy.

In their youth, no one knew how much sincerity was hidden in the casually promised future.

They ate their fries and chatted for a while. When they got a little sleepy, they lay on the table and took a nap.

Perhaps because they hadn’t slept well yesterday, both of them were in and out of sleep.

By the time they had slept enough, it was already after five in the afternoon.

Jian Xin, with an unknown source of energy, pulled Yan Lu and once again walked on the street.

They casually ate a bowl of beef noodles, then avoided the crowds and walked along the river below.

This river was very long, running through the entire Nanjiang, as if it had no end.

They walked and walked, and when they felt tired, they found a stone bench and sat down.

But they hadn’t rested for long when they saw an old man with a dog, walking along the river.

The dog was a large Golden Retriever, a super large one—Jian Xin just took one look from a distance and was so scared that she jumped up from the stone bench on the spot and hid behind Yan Lu.

“Dog! Dog dog dog!! There’s a dog, there’s a dog!!!”

“Ah…”

“Don’t be afraid, don’t be afraid, my dog doesn’t bite,” the old man came over, his accent local, his tone kind.

This Golden Retriever was not shy with strangers. Even on a leash, it wanted to come over and sniff, which scared Jian Xin into grabbing Yan Lu’s two arms and starting to run around her.

The old man called out to the dog a couple of times, smiled, and led it away, leaving a terrified Jian Xin, who hugged Yan Lu’s arm and couldn’t come back to her senses for a long time.

Yan Lu: “So you’re afraid of dogs?”

Jian Xin: “…”

Yan Lu: “I thought you weren’t afraid of anything!”

Jian Xin: “Aren’t dogs scary? They bite!”

Yan Lu blinked and asked curiously, “Have you been bitten before?”

“Don’t mention it…” Jian Xin said, but then she started to talk about the past herself.

She said that she had been chased and bitten by a dog when she was a child.

It was a very ordinary afternoon. She was on her way to school when she suddenly saw a very fierce dog staring at her on the side.

She swore she hadn’t done anything, just wanted to take a detour, but just a few steps later, the dog came towards her, which scared her into running.

The dog was also unforgiving. Seeing her run, it immediately chased after her, barking, as if she owed it a hundred tons of dog food!

The passersby saw and shouted at her.

They said—don’t run, the more you run, the more the dog will chase!

She believed them. It was tiring to run, so she just stopped.

“You have no idea, that dog was really not a person!” Jian Xin said, her teeth gritting more and more. “I had already stopped, but it still wanted to bite me. It bit through my pants, just bit, from different angles!”

“I tried to dodge, tried to kick, but it bit even harder and tighter. I felt a stinging on my calf, and I was even more afraid to move,” Jian Xin’s tone was extremely aggrieved. “I just stood there and shouted, can anyone help…”

She said that she had shouted for a long time at that time, and there were people watching on the side, but it took a long time before someone came out of a nearby mahjong parlor with a clothes-drying pole, hit the ground with it, and shouted to scare away the mad dog.

That dog was really scary. It had bitten through her pants and left a lot of bloody marks on her two legs…

Jian Xin said that it was only because that dog was very small and could only reach her calf!

When she went home from school and told Huang He about it while crying, Huang He was startled when she lifted her pant leg and immediately took her to the hospital for a rabies vaccine.

—Does it hurt to be bitten by a dog?

The person involved said that at least that small dog’s bite was not very painful. It might have been because of the pants, but it just felt like a sting.

But, but, but!

The rabies vaccine is very painful! You have to get several shots for one bite!

Jian Xin had hated getting shots since she was a child!

She said that from then on, she would get scared whenever she saw a dog, afraid that she would be bitten again for no reason.

After listening, Yan Lu smiled and patted Jian Xin’s back.

She really hadn’t expected that the Jian Xin who dared to fight with boys, dared to talk back to the head teacher, and dared to lead her to climb out of a window, would be so scared of a small dog that she couldn’t move.

She had thought that she was a person who was not afraid of anything.

“I’m not afraid of dogs. If a dog chases you again in the future, you can just hide behind me,” Yan Lu said, pulling Jian Xin back to the small stone bench by the river.

Jian Xin took several deep breaths in a row before she finally calmed down from the shock of the Golden Retriever.

This place was very quiet, and the sky was also getting dark bit by bit.

Jian Xin looked at the river thoughtfully, and after a long silence, she asked, “Can you swim?”

Yan Lu shook her head. “No.”

Jian Xin said “oh.” “Me neither.”

After this question and answer, the two of them fell into a silence again.

An unknown amount of time passed when Jian Xin spoke again, and the topic suddenly turned to a strange place.

“Yan Lu.”

“Mmm?”

“It’s not very interesting to sit here and look at the river…” Jian Xin pursed her lips and said softly, “If we have the chance, let’s go see the sea too!”

“Also… see the sea?” Yan Lu couldn’t help but look up, a hint of confusion in her eyes as she looked at Jian Xin.

“Didn’t Li Xia and Lin Xiaoshuang always want to see the sea?” Jian Xin said. “I’ve never seen it either, and I’m also very curious… When we grow up, let’s go see the sea too?”

Yan Lu tilted her head and couldn’t help but say, “It’ll be a long time before we grow up.”

Li Xia and Lin Xiaoshuang in the novel had waited a full eight years for the promise of “going to see the sea when we grow up.”

“It won’t be long, we’re almost seventeen! It’ll just be a year or two, um… two or three years, three or four years!” Jian Xin said with a grin, looking at the calm river. “It’ll be very soon, time passes very quickly!”

She knew that Yan Lu was still scared, just like Lin Xiaoshuang in the story, afraid that she couldn’t escape the long winter night.

So she thought, they should also make a date to see the sea.

When a person can’t find their way, it’s always good to have a thought in their heart.

When they get through this, when they grow up and can earn money, they’ll go to see the sea together.

It doesn’t matter if they can’t swim, they can just go and see how vast the sea is.

Yan Lu must be longing for the azure blue where the sky and the sea meet. She has already written it in her story!

If possible, she wanted to go and see everything that Yan Lu longed for with her.

And then hug her and tell her—

Everything will be alright.

This world is really very, very big. A person with courage will not be trapped in one place forever.

She would always be with her.