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Chapter 66


With a single command, the musicians were all pinned to the ground, begging for mercy in low voices. Only Xin Niang refused to grovel. Her gaze firm, she struggled to meet the Emperor’s eyes.

“Your Majesty! This humble woman has a grievance! Are you truly a wise ruler of the realm if you seize her without hearing both sides?”

The incident happened so suddenly that guards from every faction rushed to shield their masters. Led by Zishan, they formed a tight circle around the Princess and her Consort.

“Sister, what are they doing?”

Tao Chuyi asked innocently.

Nangong Yunshang gripped her hand tightly, urging her to stay still.

“Be good. Someone’s been wronged and is lodging a formal complaint. We’ll just listen.”

The Emperor’s face darkened. He waited until the musicians stopped their cries before speaking.

“How did you know this was the Emperor’s barge?”

“This humble woman heard about the incident at the inn and saw the seven pleasure barges traveling together. Not even officials travel with such fanfare. I guessed it must be Your Majesty touring Jiangnan—and sure enough, it’s summer.”

The Emperor waved a hand, signaling the guards to release Xin Niang. “You’re clever. Whom do you accuse, and of what crime?”

An attendant presented the formal complaint to the Emperor. He scanned it, and his expression grew even stormier. He immediately summoned the Eldest Princess and her Consort.

The Eldest Princess Consort read the complaint, his face paling in horror. “This is utter slander! You rabble-rouser—who put you up to this?”

Xin Niang snorted coldly. “The Prefect colludes with bandits, ignoring the deaths they cause. My fiancé died at the hands of those mountain thugs. When I reported it, the Prefect’s Yamen claimed it was an accident. Does the Prefect dare to act but not admit it?”

The Eldest Princess Consort turned ashen, but he dared not lash out before the Emperor. He could only kneel and protest his innocence.

“My father treats the people of Jiangnan like his own family. He would never do such a thing. Please investigate, Your Majesty!”

“Yes, Father Emperor. Some no-account peasant shows up out of nowhere to slander imperial kin.”

The Eldest Princess hurried to the Emperor’s side and clung to his arm, pleading.

“If word of this gets out, people will think Father Emperor lets his relatives run amok in the countryside. It’ll tarnish your lifetime of glory.”

Swayed by the pleas from the Eldest Princess and her Consort, the Emperor pondered briefly. Then he ordered the guards to chase all the musicians off the pleasure barge, as if the whole affair had never happened.

While he buried his head in the sand, Nangong Yunshang saw an opportunity. This could be her chance to remove another stumbling block.

Once the farce dispersed, everyone returned to their own barges. Nangong Yunshang quietly instructed Zishan to pass word to Zhao Linglong: investigate the Prefect’s ties to the bandits in secret.

One flourish for the imperial house meant glory for all; one scandal meant shame for all. But that didn’t include her.

Tao Chuyi bounced back to her room. Nangong Yunshang was reclining on the couch for a nap. Tao Chuyi tiptoed inside like a thief, not wanting to disturb her sister’s rest. She plopped down on the floor, propped her elbows on the couch edge, rested her chin in her hands, and stared at the sleeping beauty.

Sister was so beautiful. How could she be this beautiful?

Tao Chuyi slowly raised a hand to trace Nangong Yunshang’s brows and eyes. This beautiful sister was hers. No one could take her away.

When her fingertip brushed Nangong Yunshang’s nose, the woman opened her eyes, meeting Tao Chuyi’s innocent gaze.

“Sister, did I wake you?”

“No, I woke up on my own.”

Nangong Yunshang shifted inward, making space.

“Why are you sitting on the floor? Come up here.”

Tao Chuyi grinned and rolled onto the couch, lying next to Nangong Yunshang. She hugged one of the woman’s arms, as if that brought her peace.

Nangong Yunshang toyed with her dark hair, twining the strands around her pale, slender fingers—letting go, then twining again, endlessly amused.

“Sister, I snagged a storybook from Zishan.”

She pulled a booklet from her bosom like a treasure and flipped to the most tantalizing page.

“Sister, look—what are they doing here?”

Nangong Yunshang glanced once and snatched the booklet away.

“This isn’t for you to read.”

Tao Chuyi pouted. “Then what should I read?”

Nangong Yunshang slipped past her and rummaged through the room. At last, she found a small book in one of the bundles.

“Read this.”

Tao Chuyi took it. It was an illustrated book, titled One Thousand and One Ways to Coax Baby to Sleep on the cover page.

“Is this really for me?”

While Tao Chuyi was distracted, Nangong Yunshang quickly hid the storybook and smiled innocently, like she was fooling a child.

“Yes, really.”

If Sister said it was suitable, then it must be.

Tao Chuyi beamed with joy, clutching the picture book tightly. After all, it was a gift from her sister.

She had heard there was a Wangchuan Tower east of town, famed for its cuisine—the best in all Jiangnan, always packed.

Nangong Yunshang sent someone ahead to reserve a table, greasing palms generously. Nothing was unattainable with enough silver.

Zishan stood guard outside the restaurant with the attendants. Tao Chuyi, in high spirits for the meal, was surprised to find Zhao Linglong there too.

“Your Highness, here is the evidence of the Prefect’s crimes I uncovered. The bandits helped him eliminate rivals, and he covered up their crimes in return. Last year, the relief grain allocated by the court to Jiangnan was ‘robbed’ by the bandits—but they split it fifty-fifty with the Prefect, prompting the court to send more. The testimonies and ledgers are all here. I’ve already detained the Accountant.”

Nangong Yunshang took the ledger, skimmed it, and handed it back.

“Good. Hold on to it for now. We’ll report it to my dear Father Emperor at the right moment.”

With business concluded, the dishes arrived. Tao Chuyi didn’t touch her chopsticks or speak. She just stared at Zhao Linglong.

General Zhao grew uneasy under the scrutiny. “Does the Consort have words for this subject?”

Tao Chuyi shook her head, then lowered it to eat, ignoring her.

Bewildered, Zhao Linglong awkwardly picked up her chopsticks.

She’d only taken a few bites when she suddenly felt ill. Before she could speak, she collapsed.

“General Zhao!”

Nangong Yunshang cried out. But as she rose, her feet felt like they trod on cotton. Her legs buckled, and she began to topple.

Tao Chuyi swiftly caught her. “Sister, what’s wrong?”

By then, the guards at the door had all fallen, and everyone on the whole floor lay unconscious.

Suddenly, several shadowy figures burst in to hoist Nangong Yunshang away. Tao Chuyi clung to her fiercely, refusing to let go no matter who came.

The intruders conferred briefly and carried both off.

One was a delicate beauty with no strength to truss a chicken; the other a foolhardy kid. What trouble could they cause?

The burly bandit had plenty of muscle. He slung both over his shoulders and strode briskly up the mountain. There, he dumped them in a woodshed, locked the door, and left.

Nangong Yunshang hadn’t woken yet. Tao Chuyi padded a grass mat behind her, then crept to the door and peered through the crack. She saw people passing and heard whispers. Pressing her ear to the door, she listened closely. Two old women were talking.

“The captured press-mountain wife is a real beauty. But why’d they bring back a man too?”

“I heard him call her ‘sister.’ Must be the future wife’s little brother.”

Future wife, my ass.

Tao Chuyi grumbled inwardly and turned. Just then, Nangong Yunshang finally stirred awake.

“Sister!”

Nangong Yunshang’s head swam, her body limp. Were it not for the unfamiliar surroundings hinting at danger, she wouldn’t have wanted to move at all.

“Where are we?”

Tao Chuyi shook her head. “I don’t know. They mentioned something about a press-mountain wife.”

Nangong Yunshang paled inwardly. They’d been taken to a bandit lair.

This was disastrous.

“Chuyi, listen to me. You run down the mountain now and alert Zishan and the others. Then come back to rescue me.”

Tao Chuyi jumped up. “I’ll go beat all the bad guys outside.”

“Chuyi, it’s dangerous! Come back!”

Nangong Yunshang tried to stop her, but it was too late. Her legs were too weak to stand; she rose and promptly fell back.

What was she to do?

Tao Chuyi burst out, and sure enough, a crowd surrounded her—tall, brutish men with fierce faces. They thrust torches at her eyes in challenge.

The moment the light hit, Tao Chuyi’s gaze sharpened. A melee erupted. She stood at the woodshed door, felling each attacker singly or in pairs.

The bandits were brawny but unskilled, all brute force and no finesse.

Soon, as many lay groaning on the ground as had come—hulking men wailing like children, a ridiculous sight.

Tao Chuyi spotted the one who’d carried them and gave him a thorough thrashing.

“Mercy, young hero! Spare me!”

At that moment, the Bandit Leader charged in, all hopes pinned on him. Amid the crowd’s stares, he approached under Tao Chuyi’s indifferent gaze—and knelt.

“Big Bro, from now on, you’re the big boss of Fengshui Stronghold!”

The Bandit Leader knelt straight and proper, fists clasped in salute. He and his men prepared to bow to their new big brother.

Tao Chuyi blinked, stepping back. Who was their big bro? But…

“You all listen to me?”

“Of course! Big Bro says jump, we ask how high.”

The Second-in-Command chimed in eagerly.

Tao Chuyi glanced at the bridal chamber nearby. “Who’s that for?”

The Bandit Leader caught on quick. “For Big Bro! Men, set up the wedding hall so Big Bro and Big Sis can tie the knot!”

Nangong Yunshang knew nothing of this. Limp as she was, the old women forced her into bridal robes and dragged her to the new chamber.

She sat on the bed, unable to move, not even enough strength for suicide. All that remained was rage and despair.

She had no idea what had become of Chuyi. Surely she hadn’t been… Nangong Yunshang dared not imagine.

The bandits had all gone off to nurse their wounds and drink the wedding wine. Tao Chuyi sneaked into the bridal chamber. Seeing the figure seated primly on the couch, Tao Chuyi crept forward quietly and took hold of the ceremonial veil rod.

“Who is it? Who’s standing there? If you dare come any closer, I’ll kill myself right now!”

Tao Chuyi promptly lifted Nangong Yunshang’s veil. “Sister, it’s me.”

Nangong Yunshang stared in a daze for a long moment. “You… how did they let you in?”

Tao Chuyi grinned. “I beat them up. Now they call me Big Brother and will obey my orders from now on.”

Nangong Yunshang had no trouble accepting such a straightforward and brutal account.

Tao Chuyi rolled her eyes thoughtfully, then turned to spot a jug of wedding wine and two cups sitting on the celebratory table.

“While they’re off guard, let’s make our escape.”

Nangong Yunshang thought it over. It really was the perfect chance to flee. But when she looked up, she saw that Tao Chuyi had already picked up the jug.

“What kind of time is this to be drinking?”


The Princess’s Silly Little Prince Consort

The Princess’s Silly Little Prince Consort

公主的小傻子驸马
Status: Completed Native Language: Chinese

Tao Chuyi was known to one and all as a little fool, doted on by Lord Tao as if held in the palm of his hand. She was nearly eighteen years old, yet still unmarried. Who would marry a fool, after all?

Tao Chuyi lived a carefree life in the Tao Mansion, driving away three private tutors in succession. She loved nothing more than climbing trees and playing in the mud. She despised wearing a young master's robes—she was clearly a girl, but her father had warned her that girls' clothing would draw the Old Monster to snatch her away.

That all changed on the occasion of Tao Chuyi's eighteenth birthday, when the Emperor decreed her marriage to Nangong Yunshang, the least favored princess of all. The Third Princess wed to a little fool—Nangong Yunshang became the laughingstock of the Capital City.

On the day of their grand wedding, Nangong Yunshang had a dagger at the ready, while Tao Chuyi dreamed blissfully of taking a wife.

~~~

Wedding Eve

Tao Chuyi: "Dad, can girls marry wives too?"

Lord Tao: "Of course. Anything is possible."

~~~

After the Wedding

Nangong Yunshang: "Stay away from me."

Tao Chuyi: "Pretty wife, come here and cuddle!"

Nangong Yunshang: "You're... a girl?"

~~~

After Recovering Her Memories

Tao Chuyi gripped her sword and stood protectively in front. "Today, this subject will protect the princess completely."

Nangong Yunshang cried out in shock: "Chuyi!"

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