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Chapter 73


After buying back General Da, Tao Chuyi cherished it like a treasure. The guards scrounged up a bamboo basket for keeping crickets and foraged everywhere for food it might eat.

Once everything was ready, however, General Da refused to touch a morsel. It remained utterly listless, as if on the brink of death.

Zishan leaned in for a closer look and shook her head. “Prince Consort, I’m afraid this General Da will starve to death in a couple of days.”

Tao Chuyi crouched beside the basket, propping her cheeks in her hands, as though confronted with the greatest puzzle of her life.

“Prince Consort, why don’t we just buy another one?” Zishan suggested gently.

“No! I want this one!”

In a flash, Tao Chuyi slapped her thigh and shot to her feet, bolting toward the inn’s backyard without another word. Zishan hurried after her. By the time Zishan caught up, Tao Chuyi was already squatting beside a rock, digging into the soil.

Zishan assumed the prince consort had finally seen reason and was preparing a burial spot for General Da. Instead, Tao Chuyi unearthed a handful of tiny bugs and dropped them into a bowl she had waiting.

Tao Chuyi dashed back and poured the bugs into the basket. At once, General Da stirred. Ravenous, it devoured them in the blink of an eye until nothing remained but itself.

“See? It’s perfectly fine now.”

Zishan peered inside, her eyes widening in astonishment. “It really ate them! It’s moving—General Da’s moving!”

Her excited shout drew the nearby guards over for a look. Soon a crowd had gathered around General Da, grinning like fools. The creature seemed to thrive on the attention; after stuffing itself, it bounced back and forth energetically, as if working off the meal.

Nangong Yunshang happened by and caught sight of the group in such high spirits over a mere bug. Curiosity tugged at her, so she drew nearer and glanced into the basket. Her interest evaporated in an instant, replaced by regret for letting it get the better of her.

A bug was a bug—ugly as sin. She had no idea what these people saw in such a dingy, black thing.

Nangong Yunshang quickened her steps back to her room, practically fleeing. Yinghong had to trot to keep pace.

Once the door was shut, she exhaled deeply in relief. At last, she was free of that horrid creature.

Yinghong presented a cup of fresh tea with a smile. “The prince consort really pulled it off. She brought a half-dead cricket back from the brink.”

“When it comes to toys and games, no one beats her.”

Nangong Yunshang’s words began with a note of disdain but softened into something almost fond.

At that moment, Yinghong’s smile faded. “Your Highness, this servant received a secret report. We found no past servants at Temple Minister Tao’s family home. But… an unmarked stele was discovered in the Tao Family Cemetery.”

Nangong Yunshang looked up, her brows knitting. “Empty?”

“The agents we sent didn’t dare disturb the grave.”

Yinghong hesitated before continuing. “The soil looks fresh, like a burial from the past few years. Yet the Tao Family reports no deaths in that time…”

Nangong Yunshang fell silent. The Tao Family was going to great lengths to bury Tao Chuyi’s past. They’d left no old hometown servants behind, likely because those people knew too much. The enigmas surrounding Tao Chuyi were piling up; she had no idea where to begin unraveling them.

After a long moment, Nangong Yunshang murmured, “If this Tao Chuyi isn’t the real Tao Chuyi, then it all falls into place.”

Yinghong gasped. “Tao Chuyi isn’t Tao Chuyi? Your Highness means the current prince consort isn’t Temple Minister Tao’s child?”

“It’s only a guess. You mustn’t breathe a word of it to anyone outside these walls.”

“This servant understands.”

Yinghong bowed and withdrew, leaving Nangong Yunshang alone in the room.

She sat before the low couch, staring into space, lost in thought. If the true Tao Chuyi was dead, then who was this? And why had Tao Siqing disguised her as his dim-witted son?

She was so deep in reverie that she never even noticed Tao Chuyi slip into the room.

“Sister, why are you spacing out?”

Nangong Yunshang snapped back to herself and met Tao Chuyi’s puzzled gaze. She smiled.

“I’m waiting for you to come back. Where’s your cricket?”

Tao Chuyi plopped down beside her. “I left it with Zishan and the others.”

Not keeping her precious prize close? Nangong Yunshang feigned displeasure. “What, afraid I’ll blow up your General Da?”

Tao Chuyi let out a sheepish chuckle. “Sister’s scared of bugs. I don’t want Sister to be afraid.”

“You always know the right thing to say.”

Nangong Yunshang tapped her forehead lightly, then drew her toward the bed.

Ever since they began sharing a bed, it was Tao Chuyi who always clung to her while sleeping. Nangong Yunshang was a light sleeper at the best of times, roused by the slightest motion or sound. But with Tao Chuyi beside her, she finally managed deeper rest.

Deep into the night, Tao Chuyi began muttering in her sleep and burrowed vigorously into Nangong Yunshang’s embrace. In the end, she woke her up.

“Is Chuyi dreaming?”

Tao Chuyi showed no sign of waking, much less answering. Instead, she suddenly rolled over, pinning Nangong Yunshang beneath her, tilting up her chin in a gesture thick with unintended intimacy.

Nangong Yunshang was wide awake now, a faint blush coloring her cheeks. Was this girl having some sort of improper dream?

After a pause came Tao Chuyi’s sleepy mumble: “General Da… you have to win.”

Nangong Yunshang: “…”

She held back—barely—from kicking Tao Chuyi right off the bed. Still, any further cuddling was out of the question. Nangong Yunshang rolled over in turn, shoving Tao Chuyi to the edge and presenting her with a resolutely turned back.

The next day, the Cricket Fighting Tournament commenced as planned. Spectators jammed the venue, squeezing Nangong Yunshang’s group against the wall. Up on the high platform, Tao Chuyi fidgeted with anticipation.

Twenty-eight entrants faced off in pairs, with the seven victors advancing to the finals.

Tao Chuyi’s opponent was some spoiled young lordling whose cricket was smaller than General Da but far nimbler. The thing darted around General Da in a flurry of feints and pokes, never truly engaging, putting on a show of prowess.

“General Da, get it! Bite!”

With a savage lunge, General Da clamped onto its foe and wouldn’t let go, mauling the cricket until it was crippled.

Miss Xia hoisted Tao Chuyi’s right hand high. “Young Master Tao’s side—General Da wins!”

Thunderous applause erupted from the crowd below. Tao Chuyi beamed, clapping enthusiastically for herself.

“Fancy footwork’s no match for my General Da. It’s the best!”

“She won?”

Yinghong sounded surprised.

Zishan nodded with certainty. “She did.”

The servants clustered together, cheering wildly for the prince consort. The excitement reached a fever pitch.

Nangong Yunshang applauded too, as if encouraging a child to keep trying her hand.

Tao Chuyi swept through her next two matches to claim a finals spot. General Da demolished five more contenders before facing the last remaining cricket in the grand final.

The crowd below grew even more frenzied than those onstage. If the two crickets couldn’t settle it, the spectators might charge up to fight in their place.

Tao Chuyi waved her arms wildly from the sidelines. “General Da, go!”

This time, General Da unleashed its fury and bit the opponent dead.

The rival young master stomped off the platform in a rage. Tao Chuyi reveled in the adulation from the stage, as though she’d conquered the world.

“I never realized the prince consort had such a knack for cricket fighting.”

Zhao Linglong remarked from nearby. “The capital has tournaments too. You should enter her when we get back.”

Nangong Yunshang watched the platform, her gaze fixed unwaveringly on Tao Chuyi. “Her? She’s just fooling around.”

Surrounded by admirers, Tao Chuyi made her way back to Nangong Yunshang. The prize was a one-day tour of the Underground City that very evening, limited to three people. Nangong Yunshang chose Zishan to accompany them, while the rest would wait outside.

Tao Chuyi’s eagerly awaited Underground City adventure was underway. She entrusted General Da to a guard with strict instructions to pamper the champion, then took Nangong Yunshang’s hand and skipped happily along in Miss Xia’s group.

They crossed the arched bridge over the lake, where the crowds thinned and an ominous chill thickened in the air.

After traversing a sinister stretch of path, their guide flung open a gate ahead. Inside lay a hidden marvel.

It resembled an entirely separate city, alive with vendors hawking their wares in bustling markets—a world apart from the gloomy approach.

Tao Chuyi dashed to a mask stall and snatched up two: one with a green, fanged demon face, the other a crimson ghost.

“Aren’t there any masks that aren’t ghosts?”

The vendor produced a few more. “Plenty to choose from here, young master. Take a look.”

They were sheep-head masks. Tao Chuyi studied them a moment before setting them down.

Not as appealing as the ghosts.

“Sister, there’s a rouge shop up ahead!”

Nangong Yunshang quickened her pace to catch up. “Slow down—you’ll bump into someone.”

In the shop, Tao Chuyi grabbed a box of rouge at random and popped it open. To her surprise, the contents were blue.

Nangong Yunshang blinked in confusion. “Blue rouge?”

The proprietress, a kindly old woman, beamed. “This here’s blue rouge. Slather it on, and your beauty will dazzle the kingdom, turning every head. One catch, though: you must apply it every day. Skip even once, and your skin will wither and rot like parched earth. Pick it up again, and it’ll heal right back to perfection.”

Tao Chuyi dropped the box as if it burned her.

“Sister, let’s head somewhere else.”

Nangong Yunshang nodded at once, and they left the shop.

Zishan murmured from just behind them. “This place feels off. It’s bustling enough, but everything’s so strange… and the air hangs heavy with death.”

The Underground City—did it mean that literally?

Seeing Nangong Yunshang’s troubled expression, Tao Chuyi squeezed her hand reassuringly. “Don’t be scared, Sister. Chuyi will protect you.”

By then, they’d reached a restaurant. Surely nothing odd awaited them here.

They climbed to a private room on the second floor, where four such rooms faced the cardinal directions. Each viewing platform bore a table set with ghastly ghost masks for decoration. And it wasn’t just the rooms—down in the main hall, every table sported five of the things.

Unable to contain herself, Nangong Yunshang asked, “What are these for?”

The waiter chuckled. “These chips are marked with ghost masks—one represents ten thousand taels of silver. Soon there’ll be items on display. If you like any, just call out your bid. See the grids on the table? The back row shows the starting price; slide your chip forward to raise it. No cap on the bids.”

None of that caught Tao Chuyi’s interest. She only had eyes for the food.

Once the restaurant’s signature dishes arrived, she hovered over them without taking a single bite. The presentation was simply too bizarre.

Beneath a sheep’s head lay meat wrapped in crimson broth. Pig heart and lungs were jumbled together in one dish, while an ox head and a horse head crowded another plate, accompanied only by a few slices of red carrot.

Tao Chuyi’s face twisted in reluctance. She really didn’t want to touch it.

“What’s this called?”

The waiter patiently explained, “That’s ‘sheep’s-head dog meat,’ this is ‘wolf-heart dog lungs,’ and that’s ‘ox-head horse-face.’”


The Princess’s Silly Little Prince Consort

The Princess’s Silly Little Prince Consort

公主的小傻子驸马
Status: Completed Native Language: Chinese

Tao Chuyi was known to one and all as a little fool, doted on by Lord Tao as if held in the palm of his hand. She was nearly eighteen years old, yet still unmarried. Who would marry a fool, after all?

Tao Chuyi lived a carefree life in the Tao Mansion, driving away three private tutors in succession. She loved nothing more than climbing trees and playing in the mud. She despised wearing a young master's robes—she was clearly a girl, but her father had warned her that girls' clothing would draw the Old Monster to snatch her away.

That all changed on the occasion of Tao Chuyi's eighteenth birthday, when the Emperor decreed her marriage to Nangong Yunshang, the least favored princess of all. The Third Princess wed to a little fool—Nangong Yunshang became the laughingstock of the Capital City.

On the day of their grand wedding, Nangong Yunshang had a dagger at the ready, while Tao Chuyi dreamed blissfully of taking a wife.

~~~

Wedding Eve

Tao Chuyi: "Dad, can girls marry wives too?"

Lord Tao: "Of course. Anything is possible."

~~~

After the Wedding

Nangong Yunshang: "Stay away from me."

Tao Chuyi: "Pretty wife, come here and cuddle!"

Nangong Yunshang: "You're... a girl?"

~~~

After Recovering Her Memories

Tao Chuyi gripped her sword and stood protectively in front. "Today, this subject will protect the princess completely."

Nangong Yunshang cried out in shock: "Chuyi!"

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