After leaving the apartment, Gao Sijin hailed a taxi to the Tsukiyuki Private Library. The talkative middle-aged driver launched into a stand-up comedy routine as he drove, the long streets flanked on both sides by orderly high-rises. Out of politeness, Gao Sijin occasionally offered a perfunctory reply to the driver’s questions, but his thoughts were elsewhere.
At the party, a clamorous affair that had pulsed with the heat of passion, Gao Sijin had ultimately chosen to leave. Now, in the cold light of reflection, he truly felt he had done Yu Qingxue wrong.
I love you.
Three short words that seemed to convey a thousand feelings. Being confessed to by Yu Qingxue was a stirring, heart-fluttering event, yet ultimately, Gao Sijin had not accepted her feelings. He had chosen to leave, all for the chance to see the kimono girl once more.
Ever since he had first laid eyes on her, Gao Sijin had visited the library every day without fail, hoping for another romantic encounter with the girl. Having finally seized this opportunity, he was loath to waste it.
Besides, before his dance with Yu Qingxue, Gao Sijin had played an awkward role at the party. As the only man, he was not a skilled conversationalist. Though the other girls at the party were polite and enthusiastic, a faint sense of distance hid within their every gesture. Gao Sijin felt constrained as he moved among them. He was no social butterfly, no charmer who could please everyone. Before coming to Tokyo, he was merely a shut-in writer living a reclusive life.
Such a personality was destined never to mesh with a lively, passionate woman like Yu Qingxue.
The moment she confessed, Gao Sijin had glimpsed the life they would have if they married. Their personalities were too different. Even if he had the money to throw around, Gao Sijin would never buy a flashy BMW; he preferred a low-key, ordinary way of life. He could see that he and Yu Qingxue were fundamentally incompatible in the long run.
“We’re here, passenger.”
“Thank you.”
After paying the fare, Gao Sijin immediately dashed toward the Tsukiyuki Private Library. The small, sloping gravel path, two low granite stone walls, the fragrant plum blossom trees, and the artfully arranged pines and crabapple trees…
Gao Sijin had walked this path so many times he’d lost count. Each time, he had returned disappointed, but he held no regrets. As long as there was a chance to see her again, he didn’t care how many attempts it took.
He broke into a run.
He sprinted toward the entrance at full speed. Whether accepted or rejected, Gao Sijin had mustered enough courage.
Yu Qingxue had asked him why he had fallen for that girl at first sight. Truthfully, Gao Sijin didn’t know either. The world was full of inexplicable things, and meeting the kimono girl was the truest desire of his heart.
“You finally made it.”
The Librarian, seeing Gao Sijin rush breathlessly into the library, offered a composed, elegant smile.
“She’s on the second floor, right?”
“Yes, the girl in the kimono is up there.”
“Thank you.”
“Hey! No running in the library!”
The rich, intoxicating scent of books plucked at Gao Sijin’s heartstrings. He hurried up to the second floor, unable to wait any longer.
His anxious, pounding heart felt like a hammer striking the walls of his chest, blow by blow. His feet seemed to tread on air, weightless. This nervousness, this fluttering excitement—it was all given to him by that nameless girl.
The second floor.
Everything was as it had been yesterday.
A gentle breeze rustled the white curtains. Readers savored the books in their hands with rapt attention. People of all ages maintained a surprisingly perfect silence. The harmonious melody was far more comforting to Gao Sijin’s heart than the revelry of the party.
But where was she?
Gao Sijin walked through the corridor to the spot where he had first encountered the kimono girl. On the wooden table, a slender-necked vase held a single red rose, just like that day. The black kimono came into view. To mask his agitation, Gao Sijin grabbed a random book from the shelf and sat down in front of her.
But as he drew closer, Gao Sijin realized it was not her. Though the two were clad in similar clothes, their features were completely different. She didn’t have the long, silk-like hime-cut black hair, nor the dark crimson eyes. Her nose was not as refined, nor her lips as cherry-blossom-like.
She was just an utterly ordinary girl. Her kimono was a plain, common black. Her looks were the kind you could pass by on any street without a second thought. Even the book she was reading clashed dramatically with Gao Sijin’s tastes.
From the title on the cover, Gao Sijin recalled it was a story about members of a wealthy clan scheming against each other for an inheritance, full of backstabbing and frame-ups. It had even been adapted into a Japanese drama, overflowing with stereotypical depictions of decadent wealth, luxury cars, and Western-style houses. The Mary Sue male and female leads made it impossible for Gao Sijin to even sit through the first fifteen minutes of the first episode.
So, was this another mistake?
The Librarian had only been looking for someone wearing a black kimono and called him the moment she spotted such a distinguishing feature, completely unaware that it wasn’t the right girl.
If only he hadn’t left the party…
“Well? Did you find the love of your dreams?”
Seeing Gao Sijin descend the stairs, the Librarian immediately leaned in, her body leaning forward with the eagerness of a gossip, afraid of missing a single detail of his love story.
“She… isn’t the one I met before,” Gao Sijin said, a hint of helplessness in his voice.
“I’m so sorry for the trouble.”
“No, thank you for letting me know.”
Gao Sijin’s smile was pale and weak. The feeling was like being lifted high into the air, only to be suddenly dropped—it caught him completely off guard.
She wasn’t her.
“What will you do now?” the Librarian asked.
“I’ll head back first. My friends are still at the party.”
“I am truly very sorry.” The Librarian pressed her palms together and apologized again.
“I told you, it’s fine. Besides, I’m not the social type. It’s nice to get out for some fresh air.”
Stepping out of the library, Gao Sijin slowly lowered his head.
Perhaps he would never have the chance to see her again in this life. And yet, he secretly held onto hope for the future, because the future was full of infinite possibilities.
For now, he should take a taxi back. Remembering the mournful look in Yu Qingxue’s eyes before he left, Gao Sijin felt a twinge of unease.
School started tomorrow. Life would likely become very busy from then on.
“Sigh…”
Unable to see her, Gao Sijin let out a soft sigh, his heart a mix of complex emotions.
He took a taxi and returned to the apartment building twenty minutes later.
“Young Miss, you really have twisted sense of humor.”
What Gao Sijin did not know was that the very moment he stepped out of the apartment, the kimono girl of his dreams had walked right in. That ordinary-looking girl in the black kimono was an actress hired by Tsukiyuki Rio. Rio knew that the more difficult something was to obtain, the more cherished it became once acquired.
This was a lesson she had learned intimately herself.
If she could make Gao-kun feel the same way she did, then this love would surely be longer-lasting and utterly unbreakable.
“I’m going to meet Gao-kun soon. I’m so looking forward to it.”
“Young Miss, are you going to see the Master tomorrow?”
“Mhm. I’ve kept him on tenterhooks long enough. It’s time to give him a little reward.”
Tsukiyuki Rio wore her usual sly smile.
