Extra 1: He Mu Qing, Part 2
The mountains had completely entered autumn. The lush green and shady mountains had faded, as if a great fire had been poured down, igniting the grass and trees. The firelight was all over the mountains and plains, and it had bloomed on the dark black muddy ground.
The number of tourists who had come to Fengshan to play had suddenly increased. The empty houses, which were usually idle, had been turned into guesthouses. The farmhouses were filled with the smell of fireworks all day, and the flow of customers was booming. This was a rare and lively scene in the mountains in a year.
He Mu Qing had fewer and fewer classes. The old were leading the new, and soon a new teacher had come to take over her work. After she had left, she had to maintain the operation of the elementary school here.
She was free, and she was about to leave this place. But someone had already been idle for a few days. During the day, he would either follow the villagers into the mountains to hunt, or he would go to the river to fish. He was not at peace for a moment, and his days were leisurely and comfortable.
It was as if he had not come to see her at all. It was more like he had come here for a vacation under the banner of picking her up.
These past few days, he had come home early. He had boiled hot water in the boiler in advance and had been leaning on the recliner for a while. It had just gotten dark, and the smoke from the cooking was rising from the courtyards of every household. Someone was carrying a fishing rod on his back and was holding a full bucket and had come back.
She had heard the commotion at the door and had frowned. She had asked him to stand at the door and not move.
Su Yu had stopped at the door, and he was confused. “What’s wrong?”
“You’re covered in dust again. Did you roll in a mud pit?”, she had lightly patted the mud on his trouser legs and had straightened his collar. She had blown away the gray sand at his temples, and her tone was solemn, but it also revealed a concern. “This deep mountain and wild forest. You’re not familiar with the road. What if you get lost? And besides… there are wolves in this mountain.”
“How can there be wolves in this kind of place?”
Su Yu had smiled with a nonchalant look and had held up the bucket to show off. “Look, I’ve caught a lot today. It’s so big. This kind of fish is particularly sweet when it’s cooked in a soup…”
“Are you listening to me? How can there be no wolves… they all say there are.”
“Isn’t that just to fool children?”
He had ruffled her head. She, with her hair in a bun, had a mature and gentle beauty. She had lost her edges, and she had a little more frailty. She was not quite the same as before.
“Be good. I’ll cook you some fish soup.” He had walked to the backyard, and he was still muttering whether there was any firewood left at home.
He Mu Qing had stared at him as he had walked away. His back was straight and dejected, and there was a sense of a stability from a fresh and young to a mature look. She had touched her cheeks, and they were warm and hot in the cold of late autumn.
…
“It smells so good. When did you learn to cook soup?”, she had looked at the pot of a milky white fish soup, and her throat had moved.
“Xia Qiange.”
He Mu Qing had pouted and had lowered her eyes. She had said “oh” and had scooped the soup in a muffled voice.
“Are you going back in a few days?”
She had glanced at him and had asked, “What? Are you reluctant to leave this place?”
Su Yu had shaken his head and had said that he had just wanted to come out and see the scenery.
“Hmm? You… you don’t want to go back? Who is it that you don’t want to see… it’s not Xia Qiange, is it?”
“Cough cough…”, he had been choked by the hot soup and had coughed. His gaze had drifted to the floor. “What are you talking about? It’s not like I’m made of iron. I have to rest occasionally. This place has a very local and human touch. It’s good to just consider it as a vacation.”
“It’s not that your body can’t stand it over there, is it… Qian Ge even asked me what medicine to take to nourish her body last time.”
“Su Xi has a child, so let’s not talk about it.” She had stirred the soup in her bowl, and her soft and low voice had turned into a loud one. “Hey… you didn’t even let go of An Zhi? And I’ve long since felt that you like older and gentle sisters. Could it be that there’s also Gu Zhi? You’re not still thinking about the feeling of the past, are you?”
He Mu Qing had remembered that the two of them had spent a night in a tent that night, and it had been surprisingly peaceful. He had not been interested in her, and he had refused to be with her. Their relationship had never changed.
She… she had calculated that she would be thirty in a few more years. She had heard her roommate talk about lewd things every day, but in the end, she had not even had a pure one. She had always felt… that this hand, which was wearing a medical glove and was being disinfected every day, was very uncomfortable to do it herself. The burden was naturally on him.
“Don’t you talk nonsense. What are you thinking about all day?”, Su Yu had raised his voice to cover her.
Her resentment had deepened, and her heart was a little out of balance. She had been away for a year, and she seemed to know nothing about his life. “You’re so noble, aren’t you? You’re so pure of heart and have few desires… there just happens to be a temple on this mountain. Why don’t you go and become a monk? In the future, you can stay away from a vulgar woman like me, so that the unhealthy things in my mind won’t pollute you.”
“You’re overthinking it again…”
“I’m full.”
He Mu Qing had glared at him and had thrown away her chopsticks and had left. “Great sage. It’s the little woman who is not worthy…”
…
She had left him some hot water. After she had taken a shower, she had lightly knocked on the door and had asked her if she was asleep.
When he had heard her say that she was sleepy, Su Yu had said okay and was about to go to the side room. He had then been called out by a voice, and he had been asked to go in.
“Are you thirsty?”
Su Yu had looked at He Mu Qing, who was peeking her head out from under the blanket. Her eyes were blurry in the dim light, and they were also faintly shining with a cloudy and lewd light.
“Why are you sleeping with your hair not blown? In this cold weather… you’ll catch a cold.”
He had walked to the side of the bed and had touched her hair, which was drooping on her shoulders. It was half-wet, and the bedding was soaked with a large patch of a dark color. He had found that she was still covered with such a thin blanket.
“Where’s the blanket? It’s getting colder and colder. This little bit is not enough.”
“Didn’t I give it to you to cover yourself?”
She had asked him in return, and her eyes were staring at him. “It was you who wanted to sleep in the side room. A thick cotton blanket. How can we divide it?”
“You can tell me.” Su Yu had rubbed his eyebrows, and he was very uncomfortable with her stare. “Get up. I’ll blow your hair.”
He had held her and had gotten up. His hand was in the deep part of her hair roots, and he had smoothed her hair. The hairdryer was plugged in, and the warm wind was drying the moisture. The window in the house was not closed tightly, and a cold wind was seeping in from the exposed and thin gap. He had put his shirt on her shoulder and had asked her if she was cold.
He Mu Qing had lowered her head, and her throat was unconsciously rolling. The collar that was on her shoulder had occasionally brushed past her neck, and the smell on his body was stronger. She had turned her head and had smelled it like a thief. She had also felt that his hand was very soft, and it was a little bit deep in her hair. Her fingertips were hot on her scalp, and she was so comfortable that she was as if she were suspended in the air, and she was unable to control herself.
When had she become so sensitive to his smell?
Her hair was dry, and his hand had cruelly moved away from her. She had still gritted her teeth and had not made a sound. The tips of her feet under the blanket were tightly on the bed, and the bottom of the blanket was a mess.
He had stood up, and without the weight, the bed had hung her even higher.
“Where are you going?”, her voice was soft. She had touched the rough texture of her pajamas, and they were as loose as a coat, and there was no temptation at all. “Su Yu…”
She had called him, and her knees were lightly rubbing against her legs. “My head is so hot. Look… am I having a fever?”
“No way. So fast?”, the pair of warm hands had touched her forehead again. “It’s a little hot… I’ll go and get you some fever medicine.”
“Maybe I’ll be fine after a sleep.”
She had licked her lips, and her gaze was a little scattered.
“I’ll go and get you a blanket.”
…
The two of them had slept in the same blanket. With a slight turn, their hands and feet would inadvertently touch. And she was as if she had tens of millions of body sensation nerves out of thin air, and she was a little sensitive. Wherever he had touched, it would be hot.
He Mu Qing had not dared to move, and she had not turned her back. She was just looking at him.
The autumn in the mountains was dry. It was easy to get angry, and it was even harder to hide one’s nature.
He also seemed to be not quite the same as before. His wet and messy hair was covering his eyebrows, and his collar was drooping, and his collarbone was exposed. There was a hint of a seductive aura, and he was not so proper. His gaze was also not quite right, and it was dim, as if something were jumping.
A single man and a single woman, in a deep mountain and an old house. The cuckoo in the forest was calling one after another, and it was so loud that it was making one’s heart feel uncomfortable.
Was he going to move on her? While she was having a fever and was unable to resist, he would hold her waist and would hold her hands and feet. He would righteously punish her, this temptress who was provoking the character of a saint.
In one go… fiercely, and to have enough.
He Mu Qing had suddenly not dared to look at him. She had turned her back and was unguardedly with her back to him.
“Alright, go to sleep.”
She was in a daze for a while. She had turned her body with a very small movement and was looking at his back. She was a little stunned.
She had seen that there was a swirl in the center of his hair. The cuckoo was still calling. After a long while, a steady breathing sound was in her ear.
He was asleep? Just like that… it was over.
The night that had cooled down was long, as if it had no end. The darkness outside the window was like a deep black hole, and an endless emptiness had torn everything apart.
Late at night, it had started to drizzle.
It was hitting the window pane, and it was pattering…
…
After the rain, in the early morning, the room was cool, and the bedding was warmed by the body heat of the two of them.
He Mu Qing had woken up first. A faint and dark green was under her eyes, and her expression was dazed. For him… for the first time, she had had the thought of breaking the law. There were a lot of mountain tops in the village. It would be good to be buried there.
His breath was on her neck, and his hand was on her shoulder. He was fast asleep, and it was a torment for her.
She had shrunk back a little, and she had wanted to be calm. She had not thought that his hand would slide down from her shoulder, and his five fingers were on the mountain peak. It was as if a goshawk were swooping down on the earth, and it had bitten a rabbit.
The desire that had been suppressed all night was rampant. The feeling of her scalp being numb had suddenly rushed up. She was as if she had melted, and her scream was also soft. Her legs were straight, and her toes were tensed, as if she were stiff.
Ah… wuwu. She had immediately covered her mouth. She had thought that she might have really been a temptress in her previous life. Otherwise, how could she be so absurd? What was she doing?
She had watched as he had woken up, and she had admired her from the bottom of her heart that she could endure. She had not let him see any abnormality, and she had also asked her not to stay in bed. She had really gotten out of bed and had left. She was left alone, and she was in a proper and righteous look.
She had hated him for being indifferent, like a block of wood.
The empty bedroom, her place was just empty and was jumping. For some reason, she had moved to the bedding on his side. It was still warm, and it had the smell of her shower gel. She had thought that he had been sleeping here all night, a whole night.
He Mu Qing had held her breath, and her mind was empty. But it had slowly and slowly appeared that he had inadvertently glanced at his morning when he had gotten up. It turned out that a man was like this. She had swallowed, and she had admitted that she had been a widow for too long, and she was not normal.
Then she had closed her eyes and had broken the reason that had been restraining her for many years. She had fiercely rubbed two handfuls, and a large patch of a ripple had been spread. Her index finger and her middle finger were thin and white and long, and her nails were neatly trimmed.
They were separated, and a silver thread was drawn.
She had looked at it for a while, and that was it. She had just felt that it was boring, and it was even not as good as… when he had touched her.
…
“Aren’t you getting up? Breakfast is ready.”
He Mu Qing was in the blanket, and she was in a daze. She was bending down, and she was dizzy. Her face was red and was hot.
She had heard his voice, and she was quenching her thirst by looking at a plum. He had come to torment her again. The things that were within reach… had always been hanging her.
How could he be so excessive? She had suddenly had some desire for revenge. She had wanted him to not be able to get out of bed, and she had had the courage.
Su Yu had walked over and had pulled a little. He had not thought that the bedding would be so light and would be lifted with a single pull. A warm fragrance had rushed to his face, and a large patch of a snow-white skin was with a crimson red. The strong visual impact was on his nerves, and it was on the verge of breaking.
“How could you…”
His nose was hot. He had thought that it would be fine after a night. His heart was beating as fast as when he had been pretending to be asleep last night. “Where are your clothes?”
Su Yu had put the bedding back and had wanted to press her back on the bed. But he had been held by her neck and had been pulled to her. She was as hot as a ball of fire.
“Su Yu… you come over…”
His brief wavering had given her the courage. Her hand was on his pants waist, and the fabric was wrinkled. She was pulling it down again and again.
She had been pulled by his single hand, and she was even more anxious. Her body was not up and not down, and it was so uncomfortable that she was about to die. She had lifted his shirt again, and the riot in her body was even more fierce.
Su Yu had glanced at the wine that was hidden at the foot of the bed. He didn’t know where it had come from, and it was already half-empty. He had lightly bitten the tip of his tongue, and he had called her with the pain, and he had wanted her to wake up.
She had just raised her eyes, and her bangs were wet and were clinging to her face. Her face was as if it had been washed with clear water. Her eyes were filled with desire, and there was no light. But they were filled with a watery color, and they were soft and were sinking in. She was pleadingly licking him, and she was acting spoiled with him.
“It’s uncomfortable…”
She had suddenly held his hand and had gone down. She had touched it, and her fingertips were very wet.
“Wuwu… yeah…”
It was not as boring as when she had done it herself. His hands were very beautiful, and they were long and slender, and they were white, and his nails were clean. Her happiness was as if it were all hidden on them.
She had licked his wrist, and the corners of her eyes were upturned. She was coquettishly breathing out a breath. “Help me… okay? Don’t you feel sorry for me?”
It was like an arrow that was on a full-drawn bow. It was just short of a stimulus, and it was always not fired.
He had pounced on her, and he had kissed her. It had risen along his neckline and had landed on his lips. The touch was soft and gentle, as if the wind of March had blown. She was a land that had been covered by snow, and the flowers and grass had sprouted.
Her consciousness was in a mess, and her hands were in a mess. It was as if she were saving herself, and she had just held him down. It was as if she had turned on a switch, and she had trembled. He had suddenly pushed her away, and his face was calm. It was just that his eyes were deep, and they were dark and black.
He had lowered his eyes and had a cold face. “He Mu Qing, stop fooling around.”
He had turned around and was about to leave. He had provoked her feelings again and again, and then he had left him. This taste was even more uncomfortable than a direct pain. She had cursed out.
“Su Yu, you’re a fucking bastard. Weren’t you the one who was always seducing me? You’re leaving after you’ve made me uncomfortable? Are you not good in bed?”
He Mu Qing was holding the bedding and was covering the spring scenery. She had suddenly cried, and her cheeks were watery. They had fallen on the already-wet pillowcase. “You don’t even want to touch me. Am I so much worse than them?”
The next second, she had heard his heavy breathing. She had opened her eyes and had seen the snow-white ceiling. She had then heard the sound of the fabric falling to the ground.
He had let go of his restraint, and they had both become greedy and were in love.
The sound of the water was hitting the window with a pattering sound.
The morning after the rain was misty. The wet and cool of the autumn had wet the bedding, and it had deepened the color of the water. On her… the spring had bloomed.
She had raised her face, and her waist was half-bent, and a curve was drawn. She had turned her head and was looking. Her eyes were red, and her voice was trembling, and it was blurry.
“So… painful.”
…
One was tall and one was short. He was behind her and she was in front. The mirror was reflecting the front of the two of them. She was brushing her teeth, and he was washing his face.
He Mu Qing had lowered her head and had spit the water into the sink. She had seen that his hair was wet, and the thin fabric was outlining his lines. His messy hair was covering his eyebrows and eyes, and his breathing was shallow.
She had turned around and had taken a towel from his shoulder. She had wiped her face, and there was a faint and indistinct heat.
He didn’t seem to be unable to do it. She had blushed, and her breathing was tight.
…
The day he had left was a rare and sunny day. Ergou’s father had driven them to the station personally. The children had blocked He Mu Qing at the door, and they had cried for a long time. The feeling of reluctance was very strong, and they had sent her off for a long distance. She had promised the children that she would come and see them next autumn, and only then had she slowly gotten away.
They had taken the train directly from Fengshan back to Qingchuan. It was a day and a night’s journey. They had bought a sleeper ticket, and they had not arrived until the early morning.
She was on the upper bunk. She was listening to the wheels rolling on the tracks, and the friction of them hitting the bearings. There were many tunnels on the way. Sometimes, when they had gone in, it would be a wave of a darkness where she couldn’t see her hand in front of her face.
Her heart had been in a mess since that day. There was regret. She had fulfilled her desire, and she had messed up their relationship. The darkness would always make people let their minds wander, and they would fantasize about fear, danger, and despair. It was as if this tunnel were her future. She would always encounter darkness, and it was full of uncertainty.
She had shrunk in a corner, and she was a little scared. Her breathing was rapid, and it was covered by the sound of her heartbeat.
Before she had come to volunteer teach, half of her thoughts were reckless. She did not like to be plain and simple, and she had a pioneering spirit. She believed that life should not be confined to a corner. She had to see the other parts of this world, the bitter, the happy… she did not want to miss any of it.
But now she was trapped in a mountain with a lack of resources. This house was empty when she was living alone. With him, it seemed that the remaining space was really filled.
Work, cooking, sleeping. A day would pass in a flash. She had suddenly felt that complexity and simplicity were both a choice, and there was nothing wrong with it.
She had looked down and had looked at this body from top to bottom. She was still young, and she was still beautiful, and her figure was moving. Was all of this worth him paying for her? She liked him, so she had to be willful and had to put all of this on the scale. She had been so unconditionally demanding from the very beginning, so she had never wanted to grow up.
If she were to stop for something, what degree would she have to reach? She was the first, and she was also the most unclear.
She had always been seeking peace of mind in her instability. In this way, she would not be sad if she lost it. Just like before, she had been holding on to him and had told him that she would not be shaken off. But in fact, she was afraid. She was afraid of facing this relationship, so she had run away at the last minute.
The side of the bed was suddenly patted. She had seen that he had reached out his hand to her.
“Are you afraid of the dark? I remember you used to be…”
She was stunned for a while. She had held that hand, and her palm was warm.
“You’re back. Where do you want to go this time? You said you wanted to see the world… you don’t want to go abroad, do you?”, he had wanted to talk in the darkness to attract her attention, so that she would not be so scared. “I don’t really agree with you going abroad. It’s not safe to go and volunteer teach.”
“I’m not going anywhere. I’ll find a job and work hard. It’s time to settle down.”
They had passed another tunnel, and the car was dark. He had paused at the bottom for a while.
“Okay, that’s good.”
How long had He Mu Qing liked Su Yu? She couldn’t remember. It was probably a long time ago. There was always a beginning. The like of the past was like the white clouds in the sky, and it was boundless. She couldn’t say why. So it was hidden in her heart.
A shallow like is like a gray dog. A deep love is like a long wind.
The current love is like a long wind in a deep valley. It is gentle and formless. It seems to have stopped, but it will always blow again.
