Coveted for a Long Time 76

Chapter 76

The sky at dusk was gloomy. The cold wind blew, freezing people so much they dared not straighten their necks. Fortunately, Qiao Xi was wearing a scarf—pure white, a couple’s style Fu Bei bought for her a while ago.

Because they hadn’t seen each other for too long, the sudden meeting inevitably led to awkward silence. Qiao Xi and Qin Si had almost nothing to say. Only when Qin Si asked a question occasionally would Qiao Xi squeeze out an answer like toothpaste.

The veil of secrecy had been lifted; they couldn’t interact like before. No matter how obtuse, Qiao Xi knew she should draw a line immediately and clarify things as soon as possible. This would definitely be hurtful and might even break their original relationship, but there was no choice; cutting the knot quickly was the best solution. She decided the moment she saw the person—have a meal, talk, try to be peaceful.

However, once in the car, the atmosphere became incredibly awkward, as if even the air had stagnated.

Both knew clearly in their hearts; some things were understood without saying, like the uncrossable Chu River and Han border. Finally, Qiao Xi spoke first: “Haven’t been back to Jiang City for so long; how have you been?”

Qin Si pursed her lips, looking at the scenery outside the window first, thoughts drifting. “Pretty good, everything’s okay.”

“How long are you staying this time?” Qiao Xi asked, turning the steering wheel half a circle to head to the nearest Cantonese restaurant.

Qin Si didn’t answer, responding with silence, selectively avoiding this question, probably not wanting to say. Qiao Xi was stunned, also silent for a while.

Actually, clarifying things was difficult. Weighing every word, unable to pick a suitable sentence. Being too heartless was hurtful; lingering affection was even worse. Rejection is an art, not easy to do well.

It was rush hour. Vehicles on the road were like a winding dragon, endless at a glance, all jammed. Slower as they went forward, crawling like turtles; walking was faster than driving. Arriving at the next traffic light intersection, Qiao Xi hesitated for a long time before speaking again: “Did you travel during the New Year?”

Qin Si liked to travel everywhere. During holidays, she usually wouldn’t stay at home or in Jiang City, inviting friends to ski, skydive, climb mountains, etc. Qiao Xi hadn’t contacted her for a long time, assuming she went out to play again this year.

Unexpectedly, Qin Si said lightly, “No, spent it at home.”

“Oh, I see.” Qiao Xi was a bit surprised but didn’t ask more.

Qin Si finally responded, asking back, “What about you? Who did you spend it with?”

Asking very directly, asking who she was with. She had expected Fu Bei’s existence long ago, just never mentioned it on the phone.

This time it was Qiao Xi’s turn to be silent, pondering how to say it.

But before two seconds passed, Qin Si added, “Wan San and the others said they saw you at Duhe Square last time. What were you doing there?”

Duhe Square was far from here and Qijing Street, located in the West District, and not as prosperous as here. Qiao Xi had no friends there and rarely went usually. The last time she went was to pick up Fu Bei. At that time, Fu Bei was attending a symposium near Duhe Square and drank a little wine afterwards, so she asked Qiao Xi to pick her up. While going there, she indeed met Wan San and his wife, chatting for a few sentences.

When Fu Bei came out, Wan San was also there. Wan San’s expression was a bit off, awkward and surprised. Before Fu Bei could walk over, he made an excuse to say goodbye.

Perhaps Wan San mentioned this to Qin Si. Qin Si had guessed their relationship long ago, just never verifying it to keep a glimmer of hope. Wan San’s words completely shattered her thoughts.

Asking this was testing to some extent, testing Qiao Xi’s feelings for Fu Bei. How Qiao Xi answered became very important.

Qiao Xi understood the subtext between adults. Just then, the green light turned on, and the car in front started moving. She had to drive first, moving forward slowly for a short distance before saying, “Went to pick up my girlfriend. She went there for a meeting; couldn’t drive after drinking at the dinner, so I went to pick her up.”

Direct, unreserved, leaving no room for the other party. A simple sentence drew the line clearly, pulling the distance completely apart.

Qin Si’s expression was indifferent, her eyes never looking at Qiao Xi from getting in the car until now, always like this. She must have guessed it long ago. After all, having been together for two or three years, she knew Qiao Xi’s personality well—not very socially adept, but always crisp and decisive in relationships. If unwilling to provoke, she would refuse decisively, leaving no chance for the other party.

This was also why Qin Si never took the initiative for so long.

Qiao Xi always had someone in her heart; impossible not to discover after being together for long. Details don’t lie. She would always pay special attention to news from a certain country, a certain region, even down to a certain school. Always avoiding talking about her home, even less willing to mention the past. For a while, she ran to the university town area very diligently. Arriving at Qin Si’s shop, she didn’t do or say anything, just wandering around outside.

Strange behavior always has reasons behind it. How could Qin Si not guess? Even Wan San could see the problem, let alone her.

Her temper was really bad, always sharp-tongued, often saying one thing but meaning another. Clearly could be nicer to Qiao Xi, having countless opportunities to speak out, but just too proud and reserved, crossing the river by feeling the stones in relationships.

Now hearing Qiao Xi say this with her own ears, she just blinked, staring blankly at the flowing traffic outside. After a long time, she whispered, “Understood…”

Silent all the way until entering the Cantonese restaurant. Sitting opposite each other to eat, they still had nothing to say. During the meal, Qin Si wanted to pick up food for Qiao Xi. Before Qiao Xi could stop her, the other party paused first, seemingly finally realizing something, withdrawing her hand and putting the food in her own bowl.

Qiao Xi opened her mouth, but ultimately didn’t speak.

Almost finished eating, Qin Si said softly, “I might not come to Jiang City anymore.”

Qiao Xi’s hand paused. Hesitating for a long time, not knowing how to answer, she finally gave a hum.

She didn’t ask why, and Qin Si didn’t say. Each stayed within their own boundaries. Although sitting at the same table eating, they were separated by a distance as far as heaven and earth.

Qin Si was a second-generation rich. Her comfortable, wealthy, and free life couldn’t be separated from her family’s strong support. But elders’ support came with conditions. One could be reckless in their teens and twenties, but not later. The huge family business needed inheriting, the family burden needed shouldering; one had to accept. Few people in the world would willingly give up huge family assets to live the life they wanted. Even if willing, whether they could live that life was unknown. When full ideals collided with skinny reality, one should choose the most beneficial path.

Leaving the Cantonese restaurant after eating, the two were in a stalemate. Parting or chatting a bit longer—hard to choose, and quite agonizing.

Qiao Xi weighed for a long time, feeling she should say something. But racking her brains, she couldn’t find a topic. Looking at the bustling street, just as she was about to speak, Qin Si beat her to it again.

“I booked a ticket for one o’clock; leaving soon.”

Qiao Xi’s throat choked instantly.

Maybe before coming, this person had anticipated the final result, just unwilling to give up and wanting to try once, having bought the return ticket long ago. But still, nothing changed.

She turned her head to look at Qiao Xi, exceptionally quiet. This was also the first time she looked at Qiao Xi seriously today, her eyes full of undisguised affection and reluctance. But from beginning to end, she didn’t say a word related, leaving enough room for both sides.

Her lips trembled slightly. Controlling her emotions, changing her expression to a smile, she added, “See you again if there’s a chance.”

Qiao Xi wanted to speak but stopped, finally nodding. “See you again if there’s a chance.”

Actually, both knew clearly that they might never see each other again. Even if they did, who knew what year or month it would be.

Qin Si returned to Jiang City and did these things, but never said certain words. Giving her thoughts an explanation while maintaining her last bit of self-esteem. In this unrequited love, no one wronged anyone; just bad timing.

There are no assumptions in feelings. Not ending up together means no fate; can’t force it. Because no matter what, the other party won’t give you a chance anymore. Assumptions are just self-deception.

Before leaving, Qiao Xi saw her to the car, not planning to drive her to the airport. At such a time, one shouldn’t be polite or anything. Since the decision was made, one should be decisive, leaving no gentle beauty or unnecessary actions.

The night wind was strong. Qin Si wasn’t wearing much, subconsciously pulling her clothes tighter.

Qiao Xi lowered her head slightly, almost burying her chin completely in the scarf, not looking at her more, trying not to show any other emotions.

They stood side by side on the roadside, separated by a certain distance, not too close. This was a corner intersection; horns sounded occasionally, speeding shadows flying past constantly.

Dim streetlight fell from above, passing through the tree branches overhead, landing on the ground as mottled, messy shadows, making this place appear narrow and quiet, with a hint of oppression and dullness.

The car came.

Before getting in, Qin Si stopped suddenly, battling internally. Then she turned back and hugged Qiao Xi. The action was abrupt, but the force was gentle. She made no other intimate moves, stopping just there.

“Really leaving.” She said.

Qiao Xi still didn’t respond, not even raising her hand, saying lightly, “Thank you.”

Thanking Qin Si for teaching her tattooing, and expressing clear rejection of this feeling—a final farewell.

The long street was brightly lit, the road clear. The car went far away, driving further and further into the darkness, becoming an indistinct dot. Qiao Xi stood in place sighing for a while, returned to her car, and drove in another direction with the traffic flow. Gradually, she disappeared too.

Drifting apart, worlds apart.

**

Qiao Xi had messaged Fu Bei long ago, explaining who she was with and what she was doing. Fu Bei didn’t say much, only replying with a “Mmh,” later adding—come home early.

Trust and respect, fully believing Qiao Xi could handle such things herself.

However, when Qiao Xi returned home, Fu Bei didn’t act so free and easy. Seeing the person enter, she didn’t come to welcome her, sitting on the sofa continuing to type on the computer. On the coffee table lay a stack of paper and a pen, the paper clean. Usually, Fu Bei prepared like this when working; the paper was for drafts. Normally, several sheets would be filled long ago, but today not a stroke was made.

Qiao Xi was very self-aware. Biting her lower lip resentfully, she put down her bag and hurried over, hugging Fu Bei from the side, resting her chin on the other’s shoulder, drawling in a low voice, “I’m back—”

Walking behind this person, she saw the content on the computer screen clearly. Typing for ages, yet writing nothing much, just half a page of theory.

Feeling the warm breath on her neck, Fu Bei paused, responding lukewarmly.

“Have you eaten?” Qiao Xi asked thick-skinned, kicking off her shoes in a few moves, moving her hand to circle Fu Bei’s waist, leaning closer, pressing against the side of Fu Bei’s face, almost kissing.

Fu Bei put down the work in her hands but didn’t move the computer away, replying ambiguously, “Ate.”

Qiao Xi knew she was in the wrong. Anyone would be unhappy about such a thing. She completely lowered her face, shamelessly pulling one of Fu Bei’s hands to place on her lower back, squeezing into the other’s embrace. “How was school today? Meetings or classes? And how did the new students perform?”

Quite skilled at softening and coaxing, docile as anything now.

Fu Bei’s expression softened considerably at once. Glancing at her subtly, she put the computer on the coffee table. “No class or meeting today; came back at six.”

“Tired?” Qiao Xi asked, turning on the air conditioner in passing. Soon, warm hot air blew over.

“Not tired.”

Fu Bei’s hands were a bit cold. Feeling it, she hurried to warm them in her embrace, saying with concern, “Hands so cold, yet not wearing more. Coming home without turning on the air conditioner, sitting on the sofa all the time; don’t you know to cover yourself with a blanket?”

Words seemed very attentive, but the concern revealed was real. Her temper had improved a lot these days, only occasionally being proud. Fu Bei actually fell for this, fine after a few sentences, not really putting on airs. Lowering her eyes to look, she asked, “Where did you eat?”

“That Cantonese restaurant near the company, Li Ji, know it?” Qiao Xi answered truthfully.

“Mmh.”

“That side is closer.”

Fu Bei asked, “You chose the place?”

Qiao Xi nodded.

Thinking Fu Bei would say something else, unexpectedly, this person just said lightly, “So fond of Cantonese food; eating this every time.”

Qiao Xi preferred light flavors, loving Cantonese food since childhood. Even dating Fu Bei, she often chose Cantonese food. Feeling Fu Bei no longer holding back, she smiled, kissing Fu Bei’s chin. “Then next time let’s eat something else; going to the university town area is fine too.”

Fu Bei didn’t express anything, but was satisfied with this proactive kiss. She was a person with strong desires; usually, she initiated first, and Qiao Xi sometimes couldn’t let go. This time was different.

Catching this person’s change, Qiao Xi understood immediately. Leaning in to kiss again—first the chin, then moving to the side of the face, earlobe, slowly downwards…

Fu Bei’s breath hitched obviously, but she made no move, neither responding nor stopping, hand hovering behind Qiao Xi’s waist without really touching. Qiao Xi boldly straddled her lap, asking fawningly, “Angry?”

After speaking, she looked up to kiss the corner of Fu Bei’s lips, circling the other’s shoulders.

Fu Bei looked straight at her. “No.”

“No my foot.” Qiao Xi said. “Clearly yes; looking unhappy all over your face.”

Saying this with a deliberately coquettish tone, pleasing the other party, actions not lagging behind either. Doing this, even if Fu Bei was angry, it vanished like smoke, let alone Qiao Xi’s next move.

Fu Bei was gradually moved, expression changing, pinching Qiao Xi’s chin, forcing her to face herself. The two looked at each other, ambiguous affection flowing slowly in the air, mixed with the hot air blown by the conditioner, endlessly permeating and wrapping.

“Don’t be angry…” Qiao Xi said slowly, grabbing Fu Bei’s hand, placing it by her parting red lips…

…

White paper on the coffee table scattered everywhere; the pen rolled far away.

The two returned to the room from the living room, still without turning on the light. From the window, one could see the brilliant street in the distance. Lights of thousands of homes appeared even brighter in the dark night. But because the lights weren’t on, the scene here couldn’t be seen from outside, nor would anyone notice.

Qiao Xi supported herself with her hands behind her back on the wardrobe, lifting her slender white neck. She couldn’t see the appearance in front of her clearly, only tightening her palms, wanting to grab something in the void but catching nothing. She finally closed her eyes, only the other’s uneven breathing by her ear.

“Qiao Xi—” Fu Bei called softly.

Catching her breath, she responded.

Fu Bei sealed her lips, melting all words into this intimacy.