And there was such a good thing?
That was the first thought that flashed through Shen An’s mind after hearing Chen Nannan’s words.
His sense of responsibility wasn’t as strong as she imagined. Compared to an average boy, his sense of duty and shame had been tempered a thousand times over, adaptable and flexible as needed.
Kissing her required no responsibility—any boy hearing that would feel at least a flicker of delight at first.
After all, responsibility was fundamentally a constraint, and human nature selfishly yearned for freedom.
But most would swiftly replace that initial joy with disappointment, realizing their charm hadn’t been acknowledged.
Especially since this wasn’t some nightclub fling fueled by hormones. They had met properly, legitimately.
Yet Shen An had no such qualms.
He even felt a subtle sense of relief.
It wasn’t that he felt nothing for Chen Nannan, or that he didn’t like her at all; otherwise, he wouldn’t have invested so much effort in her.
It was just that, compared to the other girls who hadn’t fully entered the picture, Chen Nannan might become the first chain to bind him.
Through their growing interactions, Shen An had gradually realized the depth of Chen Nannan’s seriousness about relationships.
It starkly contrasted her gentle outward personality!
For clarity, consider this example: If Zhao Qingyu discovered him fooling around with others, he would still have plenty of room to maneuver, to keep stringing her along indefinitely.
Because Zhao Qingyu wouldn’t flip out easily.
And in fact, she had already noticed Shen An fooling around.
But if Chen Nannan found out—and by that, he meant concrete evidence—she would likely confront him outright and end it decisively.
If their relationship deepened to a certain point, Chen Nannan might not stop at just severing the relationship; she might sever Shen An from her life entirely.
Wasn’t that interesting? On the surface, Zhao Qingyu seemed the more possessive one, the type least tolerant of betrayal.
That was why Shen An saw her as a paper tiger.
She was far less decisive and cool-headed than she appeared. Beneath her icy exterior wrapped a fragile, soft-hearted girl.
Chen Nannan seemed mild and outgoing, the type for an amicable parting.
But in truth, her seriousness about love made her prone to extremes.
She was like a ticking time bomb, constantly reminding Shen An.
And now, even without discovering his fooling around or having evidence, she had veered into another extreme.
The extreme pursuit of “perfect love.”
Frankly, Shen An had encountered this type more than once.
Such girls’ attitudes toward love were hard for ordinary people to comprehend, and once arisen, they became the most intractable issues in a relationship.
They didn’t even involve cheating or material interests—purely mental quandaries could dismantle it all.
Because they sought “perfect love,” they tolerated no fluctuations, no blemishes, not even a glimpse of the other person falling short of expectations.
From Chen Nannan’s troubled, bitter tone, Shen An could sense that she did like him.
She didn’t dislike him; she just felt… he hadn’t shown the side she wanted.
Perhaps he was too eager, or she needed more patience…
Or maybe she was overly anxious, manufacturing her own worries.
In any case, Chen Nannan’s rejection boiled down to an irrefutable, timeless truth: “We’re not right for each other.”
No other reason—just a gut feeling that they weren’t.
She simply didn’t think he liked her that much. That was all.
So she didn’t blame Shen An at all. She felt it was her own problem.
She had accused him of being greedy, but upon second thought, she realized she was the truly greedy one.
Demanding that Shen An give her a perfect romance without the slightest flaw—wasn’t that the height of greed and excess?
Shen An didn’t feel discouraged in the least.
To touch the heart of someone as exacting about relationships as Chen Nannan was proof enough of his own charm.
Besides, just because they were suited to be friends now didn’t mean they would stay that way forever.
If anything, he’d moved too fast before, catching Chen Nannan off guard before she was fully prepared. That was why she’d always seemed so evasive.
Now they were back on track, returning to the stage where they could get to know each other as friends.
Shen An wouldn’t let go easily. He’d just pursue it in a different way.
Chen Nannan waited anxiously inside for Shen An’s response, bracing for his excitement, disappointment, or cold indifference.
But she waited and waited, and he never spoke.
Her heart sank lower and lower.
Sometimes… silence was harder to bear than words.
She realized her oversensitivity had hurt Shen An again. His thoughts… they were perfectly normal for any boy in love.
What boyfriend wouldn’t want to get intimate with his girlfriend?
Was it her own abnormality that had left him disheartened?
Feeling uneasy, Chen Nannan turned around cautiously. With trepidation and difficulty, she shifted her gaze to Shen An’s face.
She didn’t really dare look at him, afraid it might hurt him further.
But his silence made her suffer.
A massive wave of guilt was swallowing her whole.
She stole a glance. Shen An’s face was expressionless, his eyes vacant.
Chen Nannan’s heart clenched sharply.
She quickly grasped Shen An’s hand and whispered, “Pretend I didn’t say anything just now, okay?”
Was Shen An really expressionless?
Not at all.
His expression was calm, and he was deep in thought.
It was just that, under Chen Nannan’s overly sensitive mindset, it came across as the blank “hurt” of someone wounded.
Chen Nannan’s timid, uneasy voice pulled Shen An back to the present.
He looked at her. She was trembling like a flower battered by a storm.
Even so, she met his eyes with a gentle gaze, trying to make amends after the fact.
In that instant, Shen An knew exactly what to do.
Throw a tantrum? That would be childish. It wouldn’t solve anything and would only heighten Chen Nannan’s sensitivity, making it impossible to return to their normal relationship.
Pretend nothing had happened, going along with her words?
No, that wouldn’t do.
Shen An didn’t want to be tied down so soon.
Besides, Chen Nannan had been the one to call it unsuitable first. Though he wasn’t frustrated, he was a bit displeased.
Even if they pretended nothing happened, it would only delay the conflict.
Deep down, Chen Nannan didn’t accept it. Even if they tacitly ignored it now, the next explosion would be even more intense.
Shen An agreed with her view—they weren’t suited right now.
But when the time came that they were, the one craving intimacy might not be him.
He sighed and gripped her small hand tightly.
Chen Nannan let out a long breath and stood, pulling him up. “Let’s go eat. I’m hungry.”
She thought Shen An had chosen to let it slide.
It hurt a little, but… it was better than drowning in a vortex of guilt.
She didn’t want to lose Shen An completely either—this… “friend.”
But Shen An gently tugged her back, pulling Chen Nannan onto the bed beside him.
She plopped down with a thud, and unease flooded her heart again.
A gentle smile curved Shen An’s lips as he soothed her with his eyes. “So, is this what you really wanted to say deep down, Senior Sister?”
Chen Nannan turned her head away. “I didn’t say anything just now.”
“No, I heard it.”
Shen An shook his head firmly. “I heard it loud and clear.”
“Shen An…” Chen Nannan’s tone carried a plea. She didn’t want him to keep going.
“It’s okay, Senior Sister.”
Shen An reached over and ruffled her long hair, murmuring softly, “Honest frankness is the core soul of any relationship.”
“You bravely spoke your true feelings. That’s a good thing.”
“You…” Chen Nannan didn’t feel relieved. If anything, she grew more uneasy.
“Uh, your expression…” Shen An chuckled and pinched her cheek. “Are you feeling guilty?”
Chen Nannan nodded.
“No need.”
Shen An acted carefree, waving it off. “For two people to be together or not, both have to truly agree.”
“Since you don’t think it’s right, Senior Sister, I shouldn’t force you. I should try to understand you.”
“I thought about it, and yeah, it really doesn’t seem suitable.”
He hooked his finger with hers and said softly, “I was too eager, like some horny guy who’s never seen a woman. You need long-term patience, which might not be something I can give.”
“If I can’t meet your expectations, I have no right to demand anything from you.”
“No… it’s… it’s my problem.” Chen Nannan shook her head.
“I definitely have issues too.”
Shen An insisted. “It can’t just be your problem, Senior Sister. You’re great.”
This…
Chen Nannan pouted, her eyes reddening with moisture. “You’re great too.”
“Right, we’re both great. We’re just not suited.”
Shen An gave a slightly helpless smile. He shook her small hand vigorously, then pulled her into a hug. “Don’t hate it. Let me hug you one more time.”
Chen Nannan didn’t resist at all.
On the contrary, she hugged him tightly.
In her ear, she heard Shen An murmur, “Maybe it’s the last time I get to hug you.”
In that moment, she even felt a twinge of regret.
Because right now, Shen An was giving her the unspoken comfort and care she’d always wanted.
Had she… spoken too soon?
Truth be told, it hadn’t been that long.
Even counting from when they’d met, it was only a month.
Still, she didn’t feel relieved.
This in-between feeling, like a fishbone lodged in her throat, left Chen Nannan at a loss and bewildered.
Overly harsh when she should have been soft, overly soft when she should have been harsh.
Chen Nannan had no romantic experience. All her understanding of love came from the ideals formed since childhood, from her family, her parents.
She thought it should be this way. She needed it to be this way.
But once she actually experienced it, she realized it wasn’t.
So she felt uncomfortable and wanted to rebel.
Yet after rebelling, she gradually realized… maybe that initial ideal wasn’t what she wanted either.
She was starting to question her own notions of love.
The hug was brief, and it was probably the most proper embrace in all of Shen An and Chen Nannan’s time together.
He made no sneaky moves; his hands stayed perfectly behaved.
Chen Nannan, on the other hand, squeezed so hard he could barely breathe.
He patted her back and murmured, “Okay.”
Chen Nannan slowly released him, keeping her head down, still avoiding his eyes.
“Ha, why do you look so down?”
Shen An’s lips quirked up in a smile. “You must be hungry. Come on, let’s go eat.”
“Okay…”
Chen Nannan nodded obediently.
Shen An left her room without a hint of reluctance, respecting her privacy just as she’d hoped.
Chen Nannan stood dazed in her room for a moment before following him out.
She even forgot to close the door.
When she reached the living room, she saw Shen An lingering by the fridge.
“What are you looking for?” she asked.
“Oh~” Shen An turned. “Senior Sister, do you always eat takeout?”
“What’s wrong?”
“Ha~ I was planning to show off my skills today. My cooking’s pretty good.”
Shen An boasted. “But your fridge doesn’t have much for me to work with.”
Chen Nannan paused, then said softly, “Were you going to cook for me?”
“Mm-hmm.”
Shen An nodded with a smile.
“But since there’s nothing, let’s just eat out.”
“There’s a supermarket downstairs.”
Chen Nannan said suddenly.
Shen An blinked. Chen Nannan averted her eyes. “The complex has a supermarket. It has stuff.”
“Sure, then. Want to come with me to buy some, Senior Sister?”
Shen An asked gently.
“Sure. You’re cooking for me, right? I need to pick what I want to eat. What if you buy back stuff I don’t like?”
Chen Nannan forced a smile.
“Good point. Let’s go.”
Shen An smiled too.
They both tacitly shifted their relationship back to friends.
