Chapter 83
On this quiet night, a total of three gunshots were heard.
The scorching flames burned in the huge furnace, emitting a choking smell. Then the boiler room door was closed again, locking in all the things that had happened inside that were unknown to outsiders.
It was already late at night. After the few of them had dealt with the bodies and parked the cars, they returned to their respective rooms to rest. They were in no mood to do anything else.
The fire water pipe was connected to a faucet at the end. It was usually left in the corridor. Whoever wanted to use it would pull it into the house to get water, and then throw it back into the corridor after use.
Sang Lu was sniffing around in the room, throwing away the things that had been touched by others. Xia Weishuang didn’t know where she had gotten this habit, and let her be wanton in the living room.
When she was about to touch the things in her room, Xia Weishuang raised her hand to stop her. “There’s no need.”
It was just a potted plant whose leaves had been pinched by someone. Why should it be thrown away just because it had been touched by someone? The potted plant was not at fault.
Sang Lu was quite easy to talk to at this time. For such a not-so-important matter, she had always been very obedient to Xia Weishuang.
Besides, she had remembered something more important—Xia Weishuang, who was a human, had not eaten anything at night.
Sang Lu brought some food and placed it in front of Xia Weishuang. Xia Weishuang picked it up and brought it to her mouth, but she really couldn’t eat it.
Sang Lu was a little puzzled. “You’re not eating?”
The monster, who was always hungry when she saw Xia Weishuang, had too many things she couldn’t understand. Because Xia Weishuang had said she would teach her, she asked directly.
“Why?”
Xia Weishuang put down the food and did not answer directly, but asked her back, “When you’re killing people, what do you feel?”
Sang Lu was confused and said, “What feeling? Ah—I will fulfill Shuangshuang’s request, and Shuangshuang will love me. I’m very happy.”
“Besides today,” Xia Weishuang said. “What about before? When you wanted to kill a human, what did you feel?”
Sang Lu said honestly, “I don’t remember.”
Xia Weishuang asked again, “To you, is there a difference between killing a person and killing a zombie?”
Sang Lu said, “There is.”
Xia Weishuang looked up slightly and waited seriously for Sang Lu’s answer.
Sang Lu replied, “Zombies can be eaten. Most humans can’t.”
This was the reason why her killing behavior was mostly aimed at zombies and not humans. The situations where Sang Lu had slaughtered humans were basically only related to herself. Xia Weishuang once again clearly realized this. She understood that in essence, humans and zombies were not very different to Sang Lu.
The act of killing itself could not cause a change in Sang Lu’s emotions. Only when it was related to herself would she have emotions.
This kind of thing, to her, was probably like humans killing chickens and pigs… no, most humans, even if they ate animals, did not like to see the scene of animals being killed, and they did not dare to do it themselves. When they saw them struggling in their death throes and letting out miserable howls, many people would feel uncomfortable and unable to bear it.
Even, Sang Lu could not be regarded as a human who cut melons and vegetables. A human who could not receive the signals of plants would also know how to appreciate the beauty of plants and would not bear to destroy the prosperous flower branches.
Sang Lu suddenly remembered something and happily took out two round crystals from her pocket and stuffed them into Xia Weishuang’s hands, as if she were giving candy to her beloved little girl.
“For you. This is better than the others.”
Xia Weishuang looked down and felt a little strange. This crystal was different from the crystals of ordinary zombies, but Sang Lu didn’t seem to have gone to fight mutated beasts or anything recently, so where did these come from?
Before she could ask, Sang Lu took the initiative to confess, “From the espers. The side effects are small. Ah, among humans, there are a few that are worth eating.”
Xia Weishuang held the two crystals, and the scene of them being dug out of a living human’s head couldn’t help but flash before her eyes. She suddenly felt a little disgusted.
Sang Lu looked at the frowning Xia Weishuang in confusion, not understanding why she would dislike this.
Xia Weishuang put the two crystals on the table, feeling as if her palm had been burned. She said weakly, “Don’t just kill espers and eat them—no, don’t kill espers and eat them.”
The word “just” was too vague. For Sang Lu, she should just directly limit the scope.
Sang Lu was a little disappointed and let out a “hmm” while propping her cheek on her hand.
Xia Weishuang said, “Your previous question, I can’t give you an answer that you can understand now. I don’t eat, and the reason I don’t want to touch these two crystals now is the same.”
Sang Lu said, “Why? I want to know.”
Even if I can’t understand, I still want to know why.
Xia Weishuang was silent for a while, then stood up and asked Sang Lu to bring her the water pipe.
She put the pipe on the sink, and Xia Weishuang turned on the faucet to wash her hands. The water flow was small, and she washed very carefully, rubbing every finger.
“People are very complicated. Even if I tell you the answer, it’s just my own thoughts. I can’t represent everyone.”
Sang Lu said directly, “I only care about Shuangshuang’s thoughts.”
Xia Weishuang was hit by her undisguised and aggressive words, and was filled with a complicated taste. In the darkness, she glanced at Sang Lu.
Sometimes, would life be easier if emotions were simpler?
She said, “Because we are of the same race. When there is no deep hatred, to take the other party’s life with one’s own hands, even if the reason is just, even if this act is shared with a companion, the heart will still feel bad.”
Xia Weishuang turned off the faucet, looked down at her wet hands, and said softly, “I’m very afraid that one day, the weight of life will become lighter and lighter to me, and I will be lost in the pleasure of controlling others, and mistakenly think that I am the truth that can judge everything.”
“I hope that day will never come.”
Xia Weishuang pulled the faucet back, leaned against the bathroom door, and asked Sang Lu if she could understand this answer.
Sang Lu drew a circle with her head, as if she understood, but not completely.
She grabbed the water pipe and looked at Xia Weishuang. “If it’s uncomfortable, don’t think about it.”
Xia Weishuang couldn’t help but laugh. “Sang Lu, if a person’s heart can be 100% controlled by themselves, then that person is not a person, but a robot.”
Emotion is not a program that can be changed at will, and turned on and off as needed.
Xia Weishuang retreated into the bathroom, connected the shower head to the water pipe, and after turning it on, water sprayed down from above.
Sang Lu wanted to follow her in. Xia Weishuang hugged her shoulders and said, “Stay.”
She leaned against the cool tiles, and the water sprayed down on her from above, soaking her. Xia Weishuang lowered her head and pinched her fingers. Her long eyelashes could not hold the water droplets, and the water droplets dripped down in strings.
Sang Lu looked at her through the glass door. The light was very dim, but her night vision was far superior to that of ordinary people.
Xia Weishuang raised her head, wiped the water from her face, and suddenly smiled and asked, “Do you want to eat me?”
Sang Lu pressed against the glass door and looked faintly at Xia Weishuang inside. When she was reminded of this, she suddenly felt extremely hungry.
Xia Weishuang said again, “You don’t want to eat me.”
Sang Lu slowly nodded, her two hands on the door, her whole person sinister and terrifying, like a female ghost in red.
But Xia Weishuang was not very afraid of her anymore. It didn’t matter what she did to her. She was only afraid of implicating others.
“Is this very comfortable for you?”
Sang Lu shook her head.
Xia Weishuang raised her hand and brushed her wet, long hair behind her shoulders. The light-colored shirt was soaked and clung to her body. She pursed her thin lips and tilted her head up, and small streams flowed down her throat.
Xia Weishuang used Sang Lu’s own words to respond to her, “If it’s uncomfortable, don’t think about it.”
Sang Lu slowly slid down the door, and her sharp nails scraped against the glass, making a pitiful and piercing sound.
