The dean led Shen Jianqing into her office. It was a small room, with an entire wall given over to display cabinets filled with neatly arranged trophies, certificates of merit, and honorary awards.
A single sweep of the eye was enough for Shen Jianqing to spot a crystal trophy engraved with Qin Yue’s name.
It had been awarded for first prize in a physics competition.
Presented by: Xida Affiliated High School, the best high school in Jiangping.
Shen Jianqing was surprised. “Qin Yue went to Xida Affiliated High School??”
The dean walked over, pride written all over her face. “Yes. A-Yue has been a good student since she was little. So many certificates and awards that there was never enough room to display them all. I agonized for ages before picking out a few important ones to put on show. The rest are locked in the cabinet.”
Shen Jianqing furrowed her brow and searched through the display case behind the clear glass for certificates bearing Qin Yue’s name.
There were eight in total, and without exception, every single one was a first place.
Yet in the lab, she’d plainly told Cai Wen’ge that she didn’t go to university because she couldn’t keep up academically.
Was that a lie too?
And that night at her apartment, Qin Yue had said she couldn’t play the piano, only to turn around and fill a cheap electronic keyboard with a sound so unique and endlessly emotional.
Even her evasive answer when Shen Jianqing had unknowingly mentioned “parents” last night.
All of it was lies.
In their meager interactions, it seemed Qin Yue hadn’t spoken more than a few truthful words to her.
Yet Shen Jianqing felt none of the uncontrollable irritation from last night. Instead, she was burning to know why Qin Yue did this, to uncover the secret she kept hidden, to satisfy the prowling curiosity in her chest.
Shen Jianqing turned to ask the dean, who was brewing tea by the desk: “Qin Yue’s grades were so good. Why didn’t she go to university?”
The dean set down the kettle, her voice catching. “That’s my fault.”
“A-Yue has a brilliant mind. If she’d taken the competition exams normally, she would have earned a guaranteed university admission. But just before her exams, I was suddenly diagnosed with a pituitary tumor. It was large enough to require craniotomy, but my platelet count was lower than average and my clotting function was poor, so the hospital didn’t dare to propose a treatment plan lightly. I thought it was fine. We could start with conservative treatment and consider surgery after A-Yue finished her exams, but within days the symptoms became obvious.” The dean placed the tea in front of Shen Jianqing, her tone heavy. “A-Yue is smart. She could be fooled once or twice, but before long she saw through it. She dragged me through several hospitals, and she actually found a surgeon brave enough to operate. Unfortunately, there were complications during the surgery. I spent half a month in the ICU, and when I woke up, I heard she’d skipped the competition because she was worried about me.”
The dean’s tears began to fall as she spoke. “A-Yue has always been sickly, especially before she turned eight. Come winter, she was like she’d been steeped in a pot of medicine, couldn’t even step outside. Several of us teachers used to worry whether she’d survive each winter. She made it through that one, but what about the next?
“Fortunately, she eventually built herself back up a bit. Aside from being physically frail, A-Yue was no different from any other child.
“But she was always afraid of winter, and my surgery just happened to fall in winter.”
Shen Jianqing’s breathing grew heavy. “Qin Yue got sick that winter too?”
“Yes.” The dean took the tissue Shen Jianqing held out and wiped her tears. “A-Yue was practically abandoned at the institute the day she was born. She doesn’t say it, but she remembers every kindness shown to her, especially mine.
“I doted on her and favored her when she was little. She remembers it all.
“A sentimental child like that has strong opinions and doesn’t listen to reason. None of the teachers could stop her. She just stood outside the ICU keeping me company for half a month.
“Think about it. Jiangping’s winters are all howling wind and heavy snow. There wasn’t even a place to lie down outside the ICU. How could she have endured it?”
The dean let out a heavy sigh, her voice trembling badly. “That one bout of exhaustion set her back for over half a year. She missed the gaokao entirely.”
Shen Jianqing gripped the teacup, unaware of the burn in her palm. “She never took it again?”
The dean said: “No. I was so angry I didn’t speak to her for a long time over it.”
“Why not?”
“To earn money. To take care of me.”
The dean’s emotions were running too high. It took a while before she could continue. “The craniotomy cost a fortune, and my recovery was poor. For over a year I could barely see and needed someone by my side. But I’d come out of the welfare institute myself. I had no family, never married, no children.
“And A-Yue? Young as she was, she was solid at heart. She never forgot how I’d taken her to doctors all over as a child, staying up all night to care for her. Without a word, she went out to work and earn money to buy my medicine.
“If it were anyone else, gritting their teeth, they could probably manage both. And A-Yue had a strong foundation. Even if she didn’t go to school and just studied at home, she should have been able to score well.”
“But her body couldn’t handle doing two things at once,” Shen Jianqing said.
The dean glanced at her and tacitly agreed. “Once, in a fit of fury, I hit her and told her to go back to school. She just stood there obediently. When I calmed down, she crouched in front of me, holding my knee, and said, ‘Dean, I can make a good life without going to university. Give me a few years.'”
“What was I supposed to do with a child like that?” The dean was angry, helpless, and touched all at once. “I had no choice but to let her have her way.”
Shen Jianqing was submerged in the shock of the dean’s words. It took her a while before she said: “At least it proves she was worth raising.”
The dean blinked, then finally smiled. “Yes. I’ve spent my whole life in this institute, and A-Yue is the first one as stubborn as this.”
Shen Jianqing nodded and offered some comfort: “Things are better now. Qin Yue’s welding skills are among the best at the factory.”
The dean looked up at the trophies and certificates in the display cabinet, eyes glistening again. “When she left, she was still months away from being an adult. Her heart, lungs, and stomach were all weak. It was one cold and cough after another, or her stomach acting up whenever something upset her. Her hands and feet were always ice cold. Her personality wasn’t outgoing. Tell me, who would hire someone like that? She must have suffered so much to get where she is today on her own, yet she never tells us a single thing.”
Shen Jianqing tightened her grip on the cup. She couldn’t imagine it either.
After a moment’s hesitation, Shen Jianqing couldn’t help asking: “What exactly is wrong with Qin Yue’s body?”
The dean said: “Nothing seriously wrong with any one part, but every part is weaker than a healthy child’s. Put simply, A-Yue just has a frail constitution. She needs careful nurturing.”
Without a specific diagnosis, that was the hardest kind to manage.
Shen Jianqing thought heavily.
She had previously attributed Qin Yue’s pallor to work stress. If only she’d known…
Even if she had known earlier, she realized she probably wouldn’t have handled it better. She’d been reckless enough to blow up at Qin Yue over a couple of lies and leave her alone in the shop.
What was the difference between her and the person who had abandoned Qin Yue?
Shen Jianqing’s heart lurched. She asked the dean in a low voice: “Was Qin Yue abandoned here because of her health?”
The dean shook her head. “Exactly the opposite.”
Shen Jianqing didn’t understand. “What do you mean?”
The dean said: “A-Yue was placed at the gate on the thirteenth night after she was born. The only thing on her was a slip of paper with her name and birth date. That night happened to be the worst blizzard Jiangping had seen in years. Every sound was swallowed up, including a baby’s cries.”
Shen Jianqing was stunned. “She was out in the snow all night?!”
The dean’s voice was thick with guilt. “I didn’t find her until the next morning when I came to work. She was down to her last breath. The fact that she’s grown up safely until now is a blessing.”
Shen Jianqing’s brows knitted tightly. She truly couldn’t see anything blessed about it.
Qin Yue was smart and beautiful, loyal and warmhearted. She could have been someone dazzling, with an enviable job and a bright future.
And what had it all become?
To give birth and not raise a child was a disgrace to humanity.
Didn’t the person who threw Qin Yue away feel any guilt?
Hmph. Some people had no conscience and still lived perfectly well.
“By the way, may I ask your surname?” The dean suddenly spoke, breaking Shen Jianqing’s train of thought.
Shen Jianqing reined in her anger and said: “My surname is Shen. Shen Jianqing. Please just call me Little Shen. I don’t deserve the ‘you.'”
The dean accepted graciously. “Judging by how you’re dressed, you don’t look like a colleague from A-Yue’s factory. What do you do? How do you know our A-Yue?”
Shen Jianqing glossed over the sensitive parts and answered: “I’m a teacher at Jiangping University. The new campus is right next to Qin Yue’s workplace. We often send boards to their factory for processing, and I’ve asked her to help with welding before. We got to know each other that way.”
The dean nodded and said sincerely: “That’s wonderful work. A-Yue is lucky to know you.”
Shen Jianqing felt utterly ashamed. The real nature of her relationship with Qin Yue hardly warranted the word “lucky.”
After a moment’s thought, Shen Jianqing said with polite restraint: “It’s my honor to know her.”
The dean smiled and began sharing stories from Qin Yue’s childhood.
As the sun sank westward, the dean pushed open the window, letting the vast, fading dusk filter in, and said hesitantly: “Little Shen, forgive my presumption, but might I ask a favor?”
Shen Jianqing held the still-warm teacup and smiled. “Please go ahead.”
Stepping out of the dean’s office, freed from the shelter of walls and roof, Shen Jianqing’s field of vision brightened all at once.
She stood in the corridor for a moment and suddenly remembered the two students who had come out with her. It was well past the agreed-upon hour. She pulled her phone from her bag, intending to call them and explain.
When she saw the new WeChat notification on screen, Shen Jianqing’s gaze trembled.
The lab where they’d done the appraisal that day had a rule: once on the testing floor, phones had to be kept in airplane mode or turned off so communication signals wouldn’t affect the measurements.
Shen Jianqing always used airplane mode.
Later, she’d paid for the students’ meal on the department card, so she hadn’t needed her phone and forgot to take it out of airplane mode.
Now that she was finally back online and saw the WeChat message Qin Yue had sent at ten o’clock, she paused, then followed the notification in.
Seven hours later, the chubby little cat was still pressing its head against the wall in self-reflection: ears drooping, paws clenched, every line of its little back radiating pathetic misery, remarkably similar to the way someone had stood just a small step away from her last night, not daring to come closer.
Then it peeked around the wall and wiggled its butt, acting cute.
The adorable row of little cats couldn’t have been more different from the impression Qin Yue gave off, but for some reason, Shen Jianqing just wanted to connect them in her mind.
After all, only a cute person would wear themselves out watching a fish swim and fall asleep by the pool.
Shen Jianqing imagined Qin Yue at three or four years old, and the corners of her mouth curled up involuntarily. Then, thinking of the present Qin Yue, her expression suddenly grew heavy.
Qin Yue wasn’t a cat. The biggest difference between her and this soft, adorable cartoon kitten was that the kitten was loved by everyone, while she had received so little favoritism since childhood that she hadn’t even had a normal life.
“Many winters when she couldn’t go outside, A-Yue would sit by this desk in front of the electric heater, dozing off, or just gaze at the sky outside, envying the children who could run in the snow and feel the sun.”
The dean’s words replayed in Shen Jianqing’s mind, and her heart was a tangle of emotions.
No complaints, no anger, no self-pity.
Qin Yue had fought her way out of a losing start through sheer tenacity, from unwanted to the point where someone was practically begging for her help. Everything about her was enough to break your heart, yet she refused to say a word.
It was her nature, and it was her upbringing. It was plain to see from the way she had given up her education without hesitation to care for the only dean who had ever favored her.
But without an education, she had to put in multiples more effort to keep her promise to the dean: to make a good life in a few years.
Shen Jianqing exhaled long and slow. She wanted to tug on Qin Yue’s ears.
Being this stubborn meant plenty of chances to get hurt down the road.
After a moment’s silence, Shen Jianqing opened the keyboard to reply to Qin Yue.
She typed a line, deleted it, typed it again.
Five or six minutes passed, and the screen was still blank.
Shen Jianqing rubbed her forehead in frustration, switched out of WeChat, and called her students.
“I’ve got something to handle. Take a cab home on your own.”
“Remember to keep the receipts so I can reimburse you.”
The brief call ended. Shen Jianqing put her phone away and, from memory, found her way to the window where Qin Yue should be.
It was easy to find.
But the bustle inside had already dispersed. The large classroom now held only Qin Yue, asleep at her desk.
The desk was right by the window, its sash flung open. The setting sun had shed its scorching heat and poured gently over Qin Yue.
Shen Jianqing bent down and leaned on the windowsill, one arm propping her up while the other reached out. With a gentle motion, she brushed aside the hair that had fallen across Qin Yue’s cheek, then traced her beautiful brows and eyes with the soft pad of her finger, sliding slowly down along her pert nose bridge, and tapped her slightly parted lips. “Qin Yue. Master Qin. Little Cat Qin. Heh.” Shen Jianqing was amused by the last incongruous nickname. She lifted her fingers from Qin Yue’s lips and tugged her ear, saying: “We’re done facing the wall. Let me take you out to sunbathe.”
