Chapter 3: Bottom

Ding Sishu was slurping her noodles. At her cousin’s words, she bit down and snapped the strands.

“Isn’t this ‘import-ed’?” Chili oil glistened at the corner of her mouth, and she even looked a little shy.

Her cousin rolled her eyes and shoved Ding Sishu aside with her hip. “Go make me a cup of noodles. I’ll take a look for you.”

“You got it.” Ding Sishu downed a gulp of soup and got up.

If there was one thing He He appreciated about this cousin, it was exactly this. A few days ago during the move, He He had expected to be dealing with it for ages. But in just two trips, her cousin had hauled every single thing in the rental over here. More useful than any man.

These last few days, her little cousin had also tidied up the house. When He He came home from overtime and collapsed onto her bed, she spotted the blanket folded into a perfect military square. Neat and crisp — that enlistment sure hadn’t been wasted.

Skimming job listings online, He He lit a cigarette. When she finished her noodles, she passed the butt to Ding Sishu. Ding Sishu rubbed her hands together and took a drag off the cigarette butt. “Sis, these are some good smokes.”

“Obviously.” He He slurped a mouthful of noodles. “Got them from a celebrity.”

“Oh, right — the one you mentioned? The female star who filmed that anti-smoking PSA a while back?”

“Yeah.” He He eyed the laptop screen and clicked the mouse. She read through Ding Sishu’s resume, then turned to look at her. “Cousin, you spent five years abroad. Why didn’t you get an African university degree?”

“There is no African university.”

“No, I mean — didn’t you want to buff up your credentials?” Coming back to China, she could’ve passed as a “sea turtle” returnee.

“The times are different now. It’s not a planned economy. In a market economy, it’s all about ability. Sure, veterans get priority, but that’s mostly relative to state-owned enterprises. Sounds nice on paper. But these days, state enterprises and civil service positions basically all require a bachelor’s degree.”

Ding Sishu nodded. “Sis, are you saying I should further my studies?”

“Something like that.” He He pulled a few red bills from her wallet. “On Old Street, the second shop — the smaller one. Go up to the second floor. Five hundred yuan. Any African university you want, they can make it for you.”

“What?”

Ding Sishu took the red bills with both hands and gave a sincere confession. “You’re awesome, sis.”

“Don’t be so sarcastic.” He He said. “Tomorrow you’re coming with me to the set. Help carry some stuff — at least you’ll earn your boxed lunch.”

“Sure!” Ding Sishu said, pulling at her now-soft stomach. “If I don’t move around soon, I’ll lose all my muscle.”

They chatted a few more minutes, then her cousin went to bed. Ding Sishu played some games for a while, swiped two of her cousin’s cigarettes, and slipped into the bedroom.

Ding Sishu was fairly tall. Sitting on the bed, her long legs reached the floor. Cigarette dangling from her lips, she picked up the hand mirror from the bedside table. The bite mark on her neck had faded quite a bit. She’d been bitten hard — it had taken this long just to fade this much.

She touched the mark and thought back to that night. The woman had seemed a bit taller than her. Probably about the same, actually — the woman had been wearing high heels.

The woman had held an ice cube against her neck.

Whiskey ice. That whole night had been drenched in drunkenness. Ding Sishu had been drunk, and the woman had been plenty buzzed too. Ding Sishu wondered if the woman had also gone back to China.

Before falling asleep, Ding Sishu touched her wallet.

Of course she kept thinking about it. That woman — she’d ended up eighty yuan in the hole because of her.

Early the next morning, Ding Sishu left with her cousin. Her cousin managed over a dozen artists, all newly signed rookies. She was a veteran at the company and they trusted her completely.

Once they got to the set, her cousin gave a few instructions and was off running around. She didn’t come back until evening — and found Ding Sishu squatting by the roadside.

Her long limbs folded up, the girl was crouched on the curb eating a boxed lunch. He He rubbed her chin. Forget two years ago — as recently as the start of this year, her little cousin had been the pride of their family. He He had seen the pictures from her cousin’s military days. Heroic and dashing, with chevrons on her shoulders.

While He He watched, Ding Sishu looked up mid-chew. She brightened at the sight of her cousin and waved.

He He tapped out two cigarettes from the pack and walked over. Seeing the pack in her cousin’s hand, Ding Sishu felt a bit sheepish — she’d swiped two yesterday. Had they been caught that quickly?

“Busy day?” He He took out two cigarettes, put one back, and tossed the pack to Ding Sishu. “There’s a meeting later. Come sit in.”

“Awesome.” Ding Sishu stuffed the pack into her pocket and flashed her cousin a big, sweetly naive grin.

The meeting was a company-wide routine. About halfway through, her cousin introduced Ding Sishu. The managers exchanged glances. Finally, one raised a hand. “Why not ask Tiantian? He mentioned looking for a bodyguard a while back.”

“Really?” Her cousin’s eyes went wide. Tiantian seemed to be someone of some standing. “Why didn’t anyone tell me Big Star Nian needed bodyguards?”

“She just switched the previous one out.” The manager said.

The meeting hadn’t even finished before her cousin was typing away on her phone. The second it ended, she made a ten-minute call, laughing so hard her whole body shook. Ding Sishu looked over; her cousin winked back at her.

The feeling was… how to describe it… it had come to this after all.

“Shushu.” After hanging up, her cousin slung an arm around Ding Sishu’s shoulder. “You’ve hit the jackpot. You know who just booked you?”

“…” A thick “sordid deal” atmosphere hung in the air. Ding Sishu really wanted to ask whether, besides being a manager, her cousin had picked up some other little “side business.” “Tiantian?”

Her cousin flashed her teeth and gave a thumbs up.

“Sis.” Ding Sishu squeezed her eyes shut, assuming her most “fearless” expression. “As long as you don’t tell Mom and Dad, I’ll do anything.”

“This is a good thing.”

“Sis, don’t underestimate my parents’ blood pressure. They might look strong, but one spike and they’re done for.”

“Look at you. Your chest is nothing to write home about, but your imagination’s running wild.” Her cousin said.

“…” If she weren’t broke, Ding Sishu would have snapped long ago. First her cousin had joked about her career; now she was joking about her chest. A woman’s chest was not an appropriate topic for casual mockery. The dignity of the 36B could only take so much.

“Want to know how much your new boss is paying?” Her cousin held up two fingers. “Base salary.”

After hearing the number, Ding Sishu let out a breath. Her 36B deflated slightly. She decided her 36B could tolerate it — for now. Birds die for food; people couldn’t just live on cup noodles forever.

“Who’s Ding Sishu?” A deep, booming voice. Ding Sishu didn’t react at first.

She looked at the WeChat profile picture, then at the hulking man in front of her.

“Hi, I’m Tiantian.” The hulking man was a full head taller than Ding Sishu. He extended his hand and shook her arm with hearty enthusiasm. “What you chatted with me about last night was really fun.”

“…” Ding Sishu felt betrayed by the internet.

No surprises there. Last night, the flirty Ding Sishu had been showing off in front of Tiantian. Her cousin had given her Tiantian’s WeChat, and she’d asked if the person was legit. Her cousin hadn’t said anything — she’d just gestured at her own chest and given Ding Sishu a thumbs up.

We always want what we lack. The 36B Ding Sishu’s fate was lacking in chest.

Last night, when Tiantian asked what he should wear, Ding Sishu had said something low-cut. And indeed, the big man showed up in a low-necked top. Staring at the man’s muscular, bouncing pecs, Ding Sishu felt dizzy.

“People always say people online and in person are different. You seem kind of shy in person.” The big man said.

Ding Sishu silently wiped a tear from her heart. She’d been trying very hard to erase last night’s memories. Could she be blamed? What kind of muscle-man uses a big-chested cute girl as his WeChat profile picture? Looking at that picture last night, she’d sunk three full seconds into a “long-distance romance.”

“Didn’t you say when we met, you wouldn’t let me off easy?” The big man looked bashful, his pecs flexing.

“…” Bro. I’ll never flirt online again. Please let me off.

Despite all his muscle, when the big man acted coy, it was lethal. That little whine he let out — never mind her bones going soft, Ding Sishu felt her skeleton collapse entirely.

Big Man Tiantian was also a manager — a more senior one than her cousin. He currently managed just one female star. Her name was Nian Qiao, twenty-seven years old. Nian Qiao had debuted at fourteen and became a teen idol at seventeen. Even Ding Sishu — who didn’t follow celebrities — knew of Nian Qiao before she left the country. Ding Sishu did have idols, but they were all foreign. When it came to domestic stars, she didn’t know many.

“Knock ’em dead, girl.” The big man extended his little fist and punched Ding Sishu’s shoulder.

After the big man left, Ding Sishu silently massaged her shoulder. She looked at the training class in front of her — a bodyguard training course. Even though Ding Sishu had been selected, she wouldn’t start work immediately. According to Tiantian, she had to undergo systematic training.

“Hey, looks like you’re pretty close with Tiantian?” As soon as the big man left, a female bodyguard struck up a conversation.

The female bodyguard leaned in and muttered, “Weird. Doesn’t Tiantian have a thing against women?”

…It was like she was implying Ding Sishu wasn’t a woman.

QAQ How could this happen?

Being seen as a potential hookup by a gay man was genuinely upsetting for Ding Sishu, okay?

After a few days of training, the female bodyguards opened up more. “Actually, we all applied for Miss Nian’s bodyguard position back then.”

“You know why.” The female bodyguards said. “We figured Tiantian would pick a man.”

“…To be honest, I don’t think I’m that manly.”

The female bodyguards laughed. “Look at you, so modest.”

“…” QAQ?

They were joking, of course. Ding Sishu’s outward appearance was still fairly feminine — she was just straightforward by nature.

“Cousin, you really don’t look like a bottom.” After a few days together, her cousin had hit the nail on the head.

Ding Sishu protested, but her cousin just waved it off. “Fine, fine. You’re the bottom.”

After her cousin left, Ding Sishu stood there counting on her fingers. The more she thought about it, the more wrong it felt.