You Must Be Good 19

Chapter 19

◎A butterfly about to break from its cocoon.◎

All of this felt like an absurd dream to Qiao Xiaoxiao.

The villagers always loved to gossip, saying she was ill-fated and had cursed her father to an early death, and had also caused Nuonuo to become mute. Some even pointed fingers, saying she was weak-willed, getting beaten black and blue without knowing to run away. Anyone else would have fought back or fled long ago.

But who knew that from the age of five, her father’s fists and feet had become the most familiar form of “love” she knew? When she was ten, it was her uncle who led her out of the cold, damp cowshed and gave her a roof over her head.

Perhaps she really should have run away.

But her sister’s tear-filled eyes, her uncle’s furrowed brow as he puffed on his pipe, and—the time she ran into the deep mountains at the age of eight and was almost eaten by wolves, the time she ran away in the dead of winter at twelve and nearly had to have her limbs amputated from frostbite… these memories were like chains, binding her tightly to this land.

She had long since bowed her head to fate.

During a class meeting at No. 3 High School, Song Yang asked the students to talk about their dreams. Listening to her peers talk animatedly about becoming astronauts and scientists, Qiao Xiaoxiao only buried her head lower. Those sparkling dreams were like stars in the sky to her—visible, but forever out of reach.

When the teacher called on Qiao Xiaoxiao, she slowly stood up, her thin shoulders trembling slightly. The murmurs in the classroom made her clutch the hem of her school uniform, her nails almost digging into the flesh of her palms.

“I…” her voice was as soft as a falling leaf, “want a home of my own.”

The sunlight from outside the window slanted across her thin back, casting a long, slender shadow on the floor.

“It doesn’t have to be big…” her gaze fell on the worn tips of her shoes, “thirty or forty square meters is enough.” At this, she suddenly looked up, a faint light flashing in her eyes. “It would be even better if there was a small balcony that gets a lot of sun.”

She loved the feeling of the sun on her skin, so warm, so gentle.

A burst of laughter erupted in the classroom. A boy in the back row exaggeratedly slapped his desk. “Is that even a dream? My bathroom is bigger than that!”

Her words made the students roar with laughter, but the look in Song Yang’s eyes as she looked at her became complicated. On Qiao Xiaoxiao’s face, all she saw was self-loathing and caution. Her so-called dream was something her classmates, wearing the same school uniform, already had within their grasp. At that moment, Song Yang vaguely understood why Xiaoxiao had been so keen on “doing business” before.

The day she left the small village, Nuonuo clung to Qiao Xiaoxiao’s leg, crying and snotty. She hadn’t seen her mother for several days, and now her sister was leaving too. It was as if her life was ending.

Qiao Xiaoxiao held back her tears, lowered her head, and hugged her sister tightly, whispering in her ear, “Sister… Sister is finding a school for you. Don’t worry, be good.”

Because of Nuonuo’s condition, ordinary schools wouldn’t accept her. But Qiao Xiaoxiao had looked at the special schools. They were either prohibitively expensive or had poor facilities, and the children sitting inside were more like “prisoners” than students, with no freedom, constantly being watched.

Feeling her sister’s tears fall on her face, ticklish and cool, Nuonuo quickly wiped them away with her small hands. She looked up at her sister, signing with her hands, her mouth letting out a hoarse “wu wu” sound.

—Sister, Nuonuo will be good. I won’t cry. You have to study hard. Nuonuo is cheering for you!

She was so young, yet she knew what a hellish life her sister was living.

Nuonuo tried so hard to protect her sister. She would even kneel before her mother, begging her not to hit her sister. But every time, Huang Sulan would push her away forcefully or pinch her. “You little brat, did I raise you to speak up for an outsider? Remember, the reason Mommy hates her so much is because of you! It’s because of her that you became mute! You’ll be like this for the rest of your life!”

These words didn’t fill Nuonuo’s heart with hatred, but with pain and self-blame.

She was so small and couldn’t speak. She buried everything in her heart.

Before she left.

Qiao Xiaoxiao took out three hundred yuan from the milk powder can and secretly gave it to Nuonuo. She lowered her voice and instructed, “Don’t spend it recklessly. If anything happens at home, go to the small store and call me right away, okay?”

Nuonuo nodded vigorously, her small hands clutching the three hundred yuan tightly. She signed with her hands.

—Sister, I’ve finished self-studying all the books you left for me. When I’m done, can I come to the city to find you?

Qiao Xiaoxiao’s nose tingled, and tears almost fell. She hugged her sister tightly, almost embedding her into her embrace.

As the sun set, the shadow of the locust tree stretched long on the ground. Chu Xinrou leaned against the mottled tree trunk, her gaze passing through the falling locust blossoms, resting quietly on Qiao Xiaoxiao in the distance.

Yang Feitang was looking down, fiddling with the wildflowers in her hand, her fingertips gently stroking the petals. The flower tucked behind her ear made her profile look particularly bright and beautiful. She suddenly looked up. “Didn’t you already find a good school for Nuonuo?” Yang Feitang tilted her head, the petals trembling slightly with her movement. “Why don’t you tell her?”

The wind rustled through the treetops. Chu Xinrou lowered her lashes, the dappled light and shadow moving across her face. “It’s because you don’t understand the sensitive and delicate hearts of girls that you’re so miserable.”

Yang Feitang’s face turned red, and she snapped, “We’re talking about Xiaoxiao, why are you bringing me into this?”

Chu Xinrou shook her head and patiently explained to the “straight-laced woman” before her, “Do you really think she can accept help from others with a clear conscience?”

“If she really could, she wouldn’t be studying day and night, wouldn’t be racking her brains for every penny, and wouldn’t…” she paused, her throat tightening slightly, “wouldn’t push herself to this extent.”

A string of locust leaves spun down between them. Chu Xinrou bent down to pick it up and squinted at the sun. “Who in this world is born to love hardship? It’s just that they have no choice.”

“Ah, that’s true,” Yang Feitang sighed. “Coming here this time and seeing all this, I feel that our Xiaoxiao has really had it tough. It’s a wonder she didn’t turn into a pervert in such an environment.”

Chu Xinrou glared at her. Yang Feitang shrugged and put on a pitiful look. “Ah, it’s really ‘only seeing the new person’s smile, not the old person’s tears.’ It’s only been a few days, and you won’t even let me say a word.”

It wasn’t just that she wouldn’t let her say a word; she was protecting Qiao Xiaoxiao with all her heart.

When Chu Xinrou led Qiao Xiaoxiao out of Wuliu Village, Qiao Xiaoxiao clutched the worn-out strap of her backpack, her knuckles slightly white. Inside was the money she had saved up by working from dawn till dusk these past few days, of which there was now very little left. But strangely, the suffocating and urgent feeling that had lingered in her chest for years was now replaced by a heavy warmth.

As they walked, a crack appeared in the dark clouds, letting through a ray of clear light. Chu Xinrou turned to look at the small, thin girl who was a head shorter than her and gently patted her hand.

She wanted to reassure her.

Qiao Xiaoxiao opened her mouth, but in the end, she just squeezed that hand back even tighter.

In the distance, the last dark cloud was being blown away by the wind, revealing the entire blue sky.

This return, for Qiao Xiaoxiao, was like a rebirth. She felt as if her feet were finally on the ground.

She was like a butterfly about to break from its cocoon.

The days back at No. 3 High School, every step she took was exceptionally steady. She no longer needed to divert her attention to deal with the trivial malice that tore at her. All her energy could be used for two things: studying desperately and making money desperately.

In the 5 a.m. morning light, her figure could always be seen buried in her books. During breaks, at the end of the hallway, her bent back was like a fully drawn bow. She had to repay Chu Xinrou, and even more, she had to earn a future for Nuonuo. These two thoughts were like two flames, burning ceaselessly in her eyes day and night.

In the days before the placement test, Qiao Xiaoxiao’s progress was astonishingly fast. Every time Song Yang passed by the classroom, she could see her biting her pen and frowning as she solved problems, the hair on her forehead stuck to her temples with sweat, yet she was completely oblivious.

Mock exams were held every month. As the winter vacation approached, when Song Yang and the other teachers were chatting about the exam results in the office, her leg couldn’t help but shake with pride as she held her teacup. “So what if you’re in the advanced classes? I think our Xiaoxiao is no worse than yours.”

In the days after the results came out, the office was always filled with gasps of surprise. The teachers pushed up their reading glasses and repeatedly checked Qiao Xiaoxiao’s exam papers, finally concluding that she must have been too nervous during the placement test. “This child,” the math teacher shook his head and sighed, “it’s like she’s a different person.”

For Qiao Xiaoxiao, it wasn’t just the numbers on her report card that had changed.

She still remembered when the classes were first assigned, everyone was wearing all sorts of fashionable clothes, many of which were brands Qiao Xiaoxiao had never seen.

When the notice for the unified school uniform came down, Qiao Xiaoxiao felt an unprecedented sense of relief for the first time.

On the day the uniforms were distributed, she held the new blue and white uniform to her chest, the fabric still carrying the faint scent of cotton and linen. The morning sun streamed through the dormitory window. She meticulously tied her hair into a high ponytail in front of the mirror, revealing a forehead that had gradually become fair under Chu Xinrou’s careful care. The person in the mirror had clear eyes, her cheeks had a healthy blush, and even the ends of her hair seemed to dance with the golden light of the morning sun.

Qiao Xiaoxiao stared for a long time, even pinching her own cheek to make sure she wasn’t dreaming.

“So beautiful,” Chu Xinrou walked over and helped her smooth out the wrinkles on her collar with a smile. Qiao Xiaoxiao lowered her head and smiled, her fingertips gently stroking the school emblem embroidered on the uniform.

Chu Xinrou saw the dark circles under her eyes and reminded her, “Don’t get too tired.”

She felt that Xiaoxiao’s schedule was even tighter than an adult’s.

Qiao Xiaoxiao was no longer as secretive in front of Chu Xinrou as before. Her eyes lit up. “Jiejie, I went to our Fumin Street recently. I saw someone selling celebrity posters, 4 yuan each.”

At that time, they were incredibly popular in the streets and alleys.

Chu Xinrou smiled and looked at her gently. “What are your plans?”

Qiao Xiaoxiao said, “I saw online that you can get them wholesale for 500 sheets, and the cost is only one yuan per sheet.”

Chu Xinrou said, “Are you going to sell them on Fumin Street too?”

Qiao Xiaoxiao shook her head. The incident of competing with the janitor had taught her a big lesson. “I’ve looked. The garden in the adjacent district, although the foot traffic isn’t as heavy, has more young people, so it’s more suitable, and there’s no competition there. It’s a good spot.”

In fact, because of the past failure of selling campus cards, Qiao Xiaoxiao had also taken the risk factors into account. If they really didn’t sell well, she was prepared to use her connections at school.

Chu Xinrou’s lips curved. “Boss Qiao, are you tired?”

Being called that, Qiao Xiaoxiao’s face turned a little red. She pressed her lips together. “It’s okay.”

Chu Xinrou was confident in her, but she still couldn’t help but remind her, “If there are too many things, you have to learn to prioritize, understand?”

“Yes!”

During the morning run, the neat rows of uniformed students lined up on the sports field. No one would point at her old clothes anymore, and no one would notice the faded white sneakers on her feet. The wind lifted her tied-up ponytail, and also the increasingly bright light in her eyes.

—The gifts of fate are often hidden in the deepest scars.

The hardships that had once tormented Qiao Xiaoxiao were now blooming with light in unexpected places.

In physical education class, not to mention the high jump and long jump, just the 800-meter and 1000-meter runs, which made the students tremble, were met with groans of despair.

The living conditions of every household had gradually improved. Unlike before, when children couldn’t even get enough to eat, they now had little bellies and were a bit lazy.

Originally, Qiao Xiaoxiao had an English flashcard in her pocket and was prepared to just go through the motions for the 800-meter run. But when the PE teacher, Lu Chen, took out a bag of prizes to motivate the students—the notebook covers gleamed enticingly in the sun, and the metal clips of the fountain pens shone brightly.

Qiao Xiaoxiao’s pupils suddenly contracted. She was ready to prioritize. She immediately put the English card in her pocket.

The legs that had crossed mountains for a living all those years, the endurance built from running through the streets and alleys to collect scraps in the cold winter, were now boiling in her veins!

After only the first lap, a few girls from Class 4 rubbed their eyes and asked in disbelief, “Wait… what was that that just ran past?”

【Author’s Note】

Chu Xinrou is like a great mountain, always surrounding and protecting her.