A Promise in a Thought 102

Chapter 102

Song Muqing felt as if she were experiencing pain for the first time. On the way to the hospital, she had blamed herself and regretted it countless times.

But she also understood that she had always been in pain. Every day and every night after being abandoned by Lin Chuwan, this pain had followed her like a maggot attached to a bone. But today, it was as if she had tasted all the pain of her life, because she had created this day with her own hands.

If it weren’t for her constantly not letting go of Lin Chuwan, she wouldn’t have been murmuring about giving back what she owed her before she had fallen unconscious.

She held Lin Chuwan and quickly entered the hospital, not caring about the bloodstains on her face and clothes. She managed to calm herself and handed her over to the doctor to be pushed into the emergency room. She herself sat at the entrance of the emergency room, a mess, her heart and eyes filled with the image of Lin Chuwan lying in her arms with a face full of blood just now.

Her hands were clasped over her mouth and nose, her tears falling between her fingers, silent but tense.

After Uncle Wei had finished the procedures, he hurried over and told her, “Miss Song, the procedures are done. I’ve notified the madam. She should be here soon.”

Hearing this, Song Muqing lowered her head slightly and said in a hoarse voice, “Okay. Uncle Wei, you should sit down and rest.”

Uncle Wei frowned with worry and sighed.

Lin Chuwan’s examination results came out. She had fallen unconscious due to a violent impact. The wound on her forehead had been stitched several times, her right hand was dislocated, and her right leg was broken. When she was pushed into the ward, Song Muqing had completely lost her usual cold self-control and stayed by the bedside, not leaving for a single step.

This was the scene Mother Lin saw when she arrived. Song Muqing’s face and clothes were stained with blood, but it was as if she didn’t even know she was a mess. She sat by the bedside, holding Lin Chuwan’s hand, and did not move for a long time.

Lin Chuwan was still unconscious. The blood on her face had been cleaned, her face was pale, and a gauze was on her forehead.

“What happened? How did she get hurt like this?” Mother Lin was both nervous and heartbroken. She went to the other side of the bed to look at her daughter carefully.

Song Muqing squeezed Lin Chuwan’s hand tightly, looking at her pale face, and she shook her head, her voice hoarse. “Auntie, it’s my fault. It’s all because of me.”

If it weren’t for her, Lin Chuwan would not have gone out with her today. If it weren’t for her, Lin Chuwan would still be at home, chatting with her mother. If it weren’t for her, Lin Chuwan would not be lying here.

“What on earth happened?” Mother Lin asked anxiously. “What about you? Are you hurt anywhere? Why is there still blood on you?”

Song Muqing sobbed, pressed the back of Lin Chuwan’s hand to her lips, and cried silently, unable to say another word. How was she supposed to tell Mother Lin the source of all this tonight? To reveal their entanglement completely?

But at this point, did she still have the right to confess their past?

The driver, Uncle Wei, couldn’t bear to watch on the side. He held back his grief and took a few steps forward to explain to Mother Lin, “Madam, the young lady fell down the stairs. The blood on Miss Song is the young lady’s.”

Mother Lin gasped in panic and quickly checked the other parts of Lin Chuwan’s body. Only after confirming that there were no other external injuries did she let out a sigh of relief. Before she could recover, she looked at the unconscious Lin Chuwan, and the corners of her eyes turned a little red.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with our family. Why do my children always have to suffer?”

Song Muqing’s heart skipped a beat. She bit her lip tightly, and just as she was about to speak, she felt Lin Chuwan’s hand squeeze hers. She quickly stood up and wiped away her tears. “Xiao Wan? Are you awake?”

Uncle Wei and Mother Lin also moved closer. Just then, Lin Chuwan’s phone rang. Song Muqing leaned over to look, and after seeing the name on it, she was slightly taken aback, and then she answered it.

“Sister Chuwan, I have something to discuss with you. Are you free tomorrow?”

Song Muqing looked at Lin Chuwan, who had just moved her finger, took a deep breath, and said in a deep voice to Bo Muyu on the other end of the line, “Xiao Wan is in the hospital.”

“Which hospital? Tell me the room number.”

Bo Muyu immediately became serious, noted down the information Song Muqing had given her, and since it was not yet late, she drove out.

She was looking for Lin Chuwan to tell her about a decision. She was planning to go out for a walk during the Spring Festival to relax and untie all the knots that had been in her heart these past few days. She wanted to clearly and explicitly make herself accept the ending of this relationship, not to be immersed in it anymore, and not to hope for anything anymore.

A few days ago, she had felt that Lin Chuwan was not in a good state, so she had thought of asking her if she wanted to go together. It would be good to have a companion and someone to talk to. Who would have thought that the person who answered the phone would be Song Muqing? This had never happened before.

When she found the ward and knocked on the door, and Mother Lin opened it for her, the first thing she saw was her sad face. On the bed inside, the already-awake Lin Chuwan was leaning against the raised headboard, her face completely colorless, her gaze on the window outside as placid as a wisp of light smoke.

Song Muqing was standing by the bed at this time, on the phone. Bo Muyu heard a few whispers, “Check the surveillance. No matter if she slipped or was pushed by someone, I must have an explanation for this matter.”

Mother Lin welcomed Bo Muyu in, and she quickly walked to the bedside. “Sister Chuwan!”

Hearing the voice, Lin Chuwan was taken aback for a moment, turned her head, and a smile finally appeared on her pale face, her voice thin and weak. “Xiaoyu, why are you here?”

“I was just calling you to talk about something,” Bo Muyu said, sitting by the bed and holding her hand with worry, and then she glanced at Song Muqing, who was standing by the window with her back to them. “It was Senior Song who answered the phone. She told me you were in an accident.”

Lin Chuwan’s gaze shifted, and she saw Song Muqing’s tall, thin back, and her thoughts were suddenly in a jumble. When she had woken up just now, she had seen Song Muqing by the bedside, with her blood on her body and face, but she had been guarding her like this, the heartache and guilt in her eyes so obvious.

When she saw her wake up, Song Muqing’s eyes had instantly lit up, and the unconcealable concern and affection had pierced her heart, both sweet and sour.

She was tired. She didn’t want to be entangled like this anymore. She had really thought about repaying the debt she owed Song Muqing, and she had been thinking so until she had fallen unconscious just now. But after such a heart-wrenching pain, she was powerless to untie the dead knot between them anymore.

She suddenly felt a deep sorrow, averted her gaze, and looked at Bo Muyu. “I’m fine. Don’t worry. What did you want to talk to me about tonight?”

Bo Muyu shook her head. “You’re not in a good state now. Let’s not talk about those things. You should get some good rest. I’ll stay here with you for a bit and go back later.”

Lin Chuwan smiled and nodded. “Okay. You can talk to me.” After she finished, she looked up and reached out with her uninjured left hand to take the hand of her mother, who had approached. “Mom can chat with us too. You and Xiaoyu can leave together later. You don’t have to stay here with me.”

Mother Lin pulled up a chair and sat down, nodding and sighing. “Then let Muqing stay here with you. Your hands and feet are not convenient. Tomorrow, Uncle Wei and I will come and pick you up to go home.”

Lin Chuwan bit her lip and looked at the person by the window. That person had finished her call at some point and was now looking over with a deep gaze. She was unwilling to look any more and nodded at her mother.

Song Muqing walked over, her voice still a little hoarse. “Do you want something to eat?”

“Yes, you should eat something. You got hurt not long after you went out tonight,” Mother Lin asked along.

The image of Song Muqing’s loss of composure just now reappeared in Lin Chuwan’s eyes, and her current state was as if in a dream. How good it would be if they could go back to the beginning. But they couldn’t. Every time Song Muqing got close, she would think of the person she had held in her heart for so long, who wanted her to hurt. Only when she hurt would they end, would they be able to break it off.

If only she could go back to that year. If she could do it all over again, she would not wait until she had to make a choice. She would not let that choice reappear.

Thinking of this, she met Bo Muyu’s equally concerned gaze, and the next moment, she said to her mother, “Okay, I’m a little hungry too.”

Just as Song Muqing was about to speak, she was stopped by Mother Lin’s wave of her hand. “I’ll go and buy some food. Xiaoyu and Muqing, you two can keep Xiao Wan company.”

After she finished, she stood up and left. When she opened the ward door, she paused for a moment, a multitude of emotions in her eyes, and finally, she closed the door and went out.

As soon as Mother Lin left, Lin Chuwan said to Bo Muyu, “Xiaoyu, do you remember what I told you before?”

“What?” Bo Muyu couldn’t remember for a moment.

Lin Chuwan’s gaze turned to Song Muqing’s direction, but it was as if she were not looking at her. Her gaze was desolate and sorrowful, but it also had an indescribable placidness, as if she no longer hoped for anything.

“I told you that if one day you have someone you want to cherish, no matter what, don’t hide your feelings. Your feelings for her, your desire to be with her, don’t hide any of it from her. Because you don’t know when you won’t be able to say it anymore. When you’re sure, when you’re certain, you must tell her.”

As she spoke, the sourness in her heart gradually made her voice hoarse.

“You didn’t understand when I told you these things back then. Now I believe you can. By the time you really reach the day when you can’t say it anymore, everything will be too late. You can’t go back.”

“Xiao Wan…” Song Muqing gritted her teeth, her heart a mixture of feelings.

Bo Muyu looked at her, and then at Song Muqing’s unprecedented hesitant expression. She always felt that there was something between the two of them. But she couldn’t think too deeply about it now. Her mind was filled with what Lin Chuwan was saying to her now.

Lin Chuwan was unwilling to look at Song Muqing and said to Bo Muyu in a warm voice, “Never wait until you can’t say it anymore to regret it. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

Bo Muyu’s face was as calm as water, a torrent of emotions in her heart. She remembered. At that time, she hadn’t been able to understand the meaning of Lin Chuwan’s words, nor did she understand her own feelings. She only felt that Jiang Chenyin was the person she wanted to cherish, because she was completely open with her.

Later, she had faced her own feelings, and Jiang Chenyin had also known about them. She had planned to completely bury this feeling, but she had not even said the words to clearly express her feelings. She didn’t even know how Jiang Chenyin had found out. She didn’t even have the chance to prepare to express her feelings. The day she had confessed was actually the day of their parting.

By the time she had fulfilled her decision to completely give up, she might never be able to say it again in this lifetime.

She bit her lip, and bloodshot veins appeared in her eyes, her eyelashes a little wet.

“If you need to think it over, and you have things to deal with, then go,” Lin Chuwan said, seeing her expression, and let out a leisurely smile, her eyes full of understanding.

“Sister Chuwan…” Bo Muyu took a deep breath. “Thank you. I’m leaving now.”

Lin Chuwan nodded, her smile fading, and for a moment, she was in a daze. It was as if she could see the her of that year, full of worries, having to make a choice.

After saying goodbye to Song Muqing, Bo Muyu left the ward and the hospital. The cold wind blew on her face, but her emotions were in a turmoil.

It was impossible for her and Jiang Chenyin to talk about their matter face to face. She had no chance to speak. By the time she had considered how to express herself, she might not dare to say it.

But there was a voice in her heart, clamoring for her to say it openly and honestly. This was the first time, and also the only time.

On this late winter night, Jiang Chenyin did not go anywhere. After dealing with some business in the study for a while, she went down to the kitchen to get a can of beer. She had maintained this habit for the past few months. The house was empty, and when her heart was heavy, she would do this.

It had been a long time. This house seemed to have been empty for a long time, from the day Bo Muyu had left. This feeling had been with her.

She pulled open the tab of the can and drank the iced beer in the winter without a change in her expression.

If it were Bo Muyu who had gone out for a social engagement today, she would probably have brought back a cake. Jiang Chenyin let out a low laugh, stroked the can, and felt that she might not have bought a cake back. After being a screenwriting supervisor for so long, she looked like an adult.

She thought of that day when she had followed behind Bo Muyu, and she was even more lost in thought.

Suddenly, there was a loud sound of a door closing outside, and then the sound of footsteps, from slow to fast, approaching her.

She was taken aback for a moment, and subconsciously thought, why is this child running so fast?

Just as she put down the can and was about to straighten up from leaning against the cabinet, the cold air that rushed to her made her heart tremble, as if something had filled her entire heart.

“Auntie Yin…” Bo Muyu’s voice was deep as she called her, right by her ear, very, very close. “I’m sorry. I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I have to be far, far away from you in the future. I can’t be by your side… but I haven’t told you that I like you yet…”

Jiang Chenyin’s body was held very tightly. The warmth in her embrace carried the cold from outside, but it also carried a warmth that satisfied her.

She couldn’t speak, her heart ached so much that she was afraid this moment was an illusion. She was afraid that if she moved, it would disappear, afraid that in the next second, she would still be all alone here.

Bo Muyu tried hard to suppress her sobs, her tears falling on Jiang Chenyin’s neck, her voice trembling violently. “I don’t know when I started to like you. By the time I found out, it was already too late. I’m sorry. I thought about getting a little more, but I don’t dare to now…”

The humble words in her voice were like a sharp blade, mercilessly stabbing into Jiang Chenyin’s heart, making her raised hand stop in mid-air.

Bo Muyu tightened her embrace greedily and reluctantly, her lips moving incessantly, and she sniffled and continued, “I won’t be coming here again in the future. You can rest assured… this is the last time. I will work hard. I will remember your words. You don’t have to worry about me.”

Jiang Chenyin’s hands were trembling, and the sourness in her heart made her unable to stop her tears.

Bo Muyu’s face was already streaked with tears, but she tried her best to lift the corners of her lips, revealing her slightly childish small canine teeth. “If you can, don’t hate me.”

She let go of Jiang Chenyin, her vision already blurry, unable to see her face clearly. This was good too. She didn’t want to see her cold expression. This was the last time, the last time they would be so close.

She had fulfilled her wish to be completely honest with Jiang Chenyin, and she had also confessed. She had no regrets.

She bit her lip, hugged Jiang Chenyin tightly again, and then stuffed the keys to this place into her hand, and ran out as quickly as she had come in.

There was a muffled clap of thunder in the night sky, and a torrential rain began to fall in an instant. Bo Muyu ran into the rain. Her tears merged with the rain, and the sobs she had finally released were also masked by the thunder.

This was the only time she had honestly confessed the feelings in her heart. She had no hope, and she did not look back. She did not see that not long after she had run out the door, a person had chased after her and run out of the house.